Here’s where I get stuck in coming back to God. It’s a little like the catch-22 moral dilemna that made HAL nuts in the 2001 Space Odessey movie…
God wants us to live moral lives at all times, yes? Even when it’s not easy or convenient. We look back and admire the old martyrs who wouldn’t compromise on their beliefs and convictions, not even when threatened torture or promised rewards. They knew what was right, and no threat or temptation could sway them.
But then here’s this God who’s threatened to kill and torture me, just as the Romans threatened the early Christians, unless I swear my allegiance to Him. And to me, any Being who demands absolute obediance under threat of torture is ALWAYS wrong, God or not. He makes an immoral demand of me.
It seems a no-win. I stay true to Goodness, and he slays and punishes me. Or I give in to the fear of torture (or temptation of reward) and can never forgive myself for selling out my integrity and Goodness. It seems He gives a contradictory command… to be and do Good, and yet demands that I praise a Being who threatens to kill and torture anyone who doesn’t forsake that sense of Good to swear their allegiance to Him.
How do you reconcile that?
Understand it this way:
God exists; you are a created being.
You are a being who exists in a particular way, i.e., according to a particular mode of being. So you are not simply some kind of vague entity but a human person. Given that you sign your post “Marie” I am guessing you are a female person, which entails an even more particularized mode of being.
This mode of being is nonnegotiable – you are simply stuck being a person.
Now, goods arise out of a thing’s mode of being. Knives exist to cut things, so a good knife is one that cuts well (i.e., that is sharp) and a bad knife is one that cuts poorly. To be good is to be according to your mode of being.
So to be a good human is to be according to the human mode of being.
Now the human mode of being lends itself naturally to consciousness, reason, and will – so goodness for a human being involves CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSING to live as a human being ought to.
(This is the very reductive principle on which natural law is based).
Part of your nature as a human being is that you are created, as I said earlier: you were created by God, and are dependent on Him for your continued existence. This means you owe Him a debt of gratitude.
It does not matter whether or not God even wants your gratitude: the facts of the situation simply demand it. Your nature itself demands it. Because of this, it is GOOD that you render Him the gratitude which He is due.
Now, I said a moment ago that the goodness of a thing is existence in accordance with its mode of being. So what does that mean goodness in general is? Goodness must be simply being – the standard by which all good is measured is being, pure being, pure actuality.
But God IS pure being, pure actuality. Hence God IS goodness. (See the first two of the Five Ways for the reason why).
And because God is goodness, He wants what is good for you – and that means He wants you to worship Him: because it is good for you to do it.
Follow?
I said a moment ago that God is goodness. (Actually, God simply is whatever property he can be said to possess, because, being pure actuality, there is nothing about Him which He cannot literally be said to be – so God is not merely loving, for instance, he is love itself; not merely just but justice itself; and so on).
So whatever God commands is always good.
This does not mean that a thing is good merely because God commands it – God Himself has a nature, too. He cannot create anything such that He is not its creator, for instance. Therefore everything volitional He creates has a duty to worship Him. Therefore He can never command anything NOT to worship Him.
It simply means that whatever God tells you to do must be good, as a matter of metaphysical necessity, since He cannot command evil.
So whatever God tells you to do, do it.
The problem you are running into is imaging that God is Himself a moral agent. He isn’t. God is not subject to moral law: He
is moral law.
Consider an example: God, being our creator and the being who sustains us in existence, is within his rights to kill us at any time (since He is under no obligation to keep us alive). It is right and proper for Him to do so.
If He tells you to kill someone else, He is simply delegating this authority to you. And you must therefore act on it.
You may not kill on your own: such would be contrary to your nature. But you may kill whomever He commands you to kill, because He is the author of your nature and may grant exceptions from it.
If you imagine that God is somehow subordinate to human nature, such that what is bad for you is necessarily bad for Him, then you are improperly elevating human nature above the divine nature and failing to respond to God with the deference due Him. This is a bad thing.
Hope this helps.