Issues with Children during Coronavirus

[NevermoreLenore]

most of the people dying from Covid are older or have pre-existing conditions.

As a person with cancer and one who deeply respects the wisdom and wit of my elders, I take offence to this–are not older people still people worthy of protecting? Is my life worth less because I’ve been fighting cancer (and surviving btw despite the odds)? Ask my husband and kids if it’s no big deal for me to die because ‘preexisting conditions’.

Many are overweight too,

So? And? Overweight people are still people and contrary to popular American opinion, have equal value to a thin person.

but the government doesn’t bug overweight people to lose weight, which they most definitely should.

So let’s get this straight: the government ‘most definitely should’ ‘bug overweight people to lose weight’ because…reasons. But same government is

is taking too much control.

…to protect its most vulnerable members from a deadly–yes, deadly–virus?

I disagree with all the world’s economies being thrown into tumult due to a threat that largely affects older people.

Okay then, all older people, this threat to your life should remain unmitigated because economies. Your time is closer to the end that mine (supposedly) so take one for the team and let us carry on without the inconvenience of watching out for you.

I’m in a higher risk category, having liver disease, and I’m not worried. . . .

Great. Don’t be worried. And whilst I am worried on my own behalf, it pales to the worry I have for my kids, one of whom is currently undergoing treatment for cancer. A lot of bad cancers in my family–it’s genetic, preexisting, so…what? We’re more disposable? My daughter’s life is just as worthy as her healthy peers.

What offers protection is asking . . . someone . . . how they feel in the morning.

No, what offers protection is washing your hands, social distancing, and wearing a mask. I’m claustrophobic and find the masks highly uncomfortable. But even if my family and I were perfectly healthy, donning a mask during a pandemic is the smallest act of charity to protect older and, yes, even overweight people.

 

[thelibrarian]

If social distancing is enacted, masks are not necessary in some places. If the family sits together, and other pews are roped off and the church is sanitized after every mass, depending on what county or state the church is in, they COULD be properly following guidelines.

I would decide what the actual issue is – is it having an ongoing power struggle with your ex or is it truly COVID if the only place they are going with their mother, really, is to church? It may be a little of both. Don’t fall into the trap of letting your kids “Tattle” to create more strife.

My spot was a Covid Hotspot, but the people getting sick were in nursing homes or other places where they are unable to leave or take their own precautions, were going to big parties with no precautions, and brought it to their household etc. The people who were only going to the grocery store, were washing their hands before and after, etc, did typically not get it.

 

[JulianN]

Also, most of the people dying from Covid are older or have pre-existing conditions.

And therefore we shouldn’t try everything in our power to make sure those people are protected?

 

[Lara]

But not much is within our power, JulianN! That’s my point. We cannot just hunker down in our homes for three to five years trying to save people while thousands die from the effects of doing this: economic, psychological (suicide), loneliness. I know one lady who is 95 and in a nursing home who hasn’t been able to see her family now for 7 months. This is nutty!
You can put your faith in a mask if you like, but if I were near you with a known case of Covid, you would want me out of the room in a heartbeat. There is no way you would feel safe just because I’m wearing a mask. That’s my point. No place is safe outside of God.

 

[Lara]

You are putting far too much faith in these things (washing hands, social distancing, wearing a mask).

The government, if it is to have control on things, should control the right things. The first thing they should have done is disband nursing homes. This is where the spread has been the greatest, yet nobody seems to help these seniors. Also, they should be actively promoting weight loss as a way to mitigate the effects of the virus. Also, people in high risk categories, such as you, should be given the money and resources to be able to stay home. But others should be working and not receiving government funds as they are in Canada here. Healthy children should be in school, not suffering through online schooling and losing their mental health to boot.

My mother is 87 so I want her to live as much as anyone. I love elderly people but we can’t support them if people aren’t working and are on the dole. Our children will be in so much debt that eventually, other countries will have no trouble taking us over.

With all due respect, there are many conditions besides Covid which should hold our interest.

 

[Miketdobbs]

If social distancing is enacted, masks are not necessary in some places. If the family sits together, and other pews are roped off and the church is sanitized after every mass, depending on what county or state the church is in, they COULD be properly following guidelines.

I do not disagree that proper practices can take away the necessity for masks. This being said, in my region where I live, masks are mandatory in any public place (including churches.) I am trying to teach my kids prudence and good judgment. Not only am I up against a co parent who teaches them something different, but the Church that my children go to is the only church… in my entire diocese… that does not follow the mask mandate. So my oldest daughter (11 years old)… thinks that her views, of the virus being overblown/fake news (her words) are backed by the church.

I would decide what the actual issue is – is it having an ongoing power struggle with your ex or is it truly COVID

The issue is about trying to follow the protocol of the local bishop who is trying to make the most prudential decisions that he can. The issue is me trying to teach my children that though they may never get sick from it, others will. The issue is that even if my children never have any symptoms of the virus, they could spread it to their immunocompromised little cousin or their sickly grandfather.

Don’t fall into the trap of letting your kids “Tattle” to create more strife.

I have been separated for 10 years. I have gone to court on 2 occasions to try to prevent my children from moving across the country with her. If I was going to “tattle” on her, I would’ve already done that and not posted my concerns on the Catholic message board that I use daily.

Can you understand my position here? I try explaining to my daughter why its prudent to follow church mandates and canons (which gives the church authority to make adjustments during times liks this) I am trying to get them to understand and respect the wisdom of honest scientists and their health guidelines so long as they are not over burdensome to her and her responses sound something like “well mom says…and my church says… and they think its a nefarious overblown communistic plot”. Can you see how this could be a struggle for me as a parent?

 

[Miketdobbs]

One of the issues with nursing homes is that they are virus hotspots and care home/ nursing home workers are severely underpaid and vulnerable themselves to contracting illnesses and bringing it home to their families.

 

[Lara]

Your choices are:

1. communicate effectively with your ex-wife.
2. communicate effectively with your daughter. There is some merit to teaching your daughter to follow authority if you trust authority. I don’t in this case, but I would say avoid tickets and jail sentences. That’s the only reason I wear the mask. I can barely breathe in it, and feel sick after wearing it for over an hour. (But nobody cares about the sickness I feel, I can assure you.)
3. don’t communicate to either and let them do as they wish. This would be my choice. I’d focus on other things for sure.

 

[QContinuum]

Same here. It’s all very fine to say 22-year-olds mostly don’t die of it, but if infected, they spread it to at-risk members of the community,

Quite true. To say nothing about the fact we have only 9 months of history on this virus, which is indeed why it is called, “novel.” Medical literature is increasingly showing that even mild cases can result in long term heart and kidney damage. Dismissing cases among 20-somethings because they don’t expire of the virus is incredibly short sighted. Can you imagine the fallout from a whole generation of young people having increased risks of stoke and heart attacks before they hit 30?

The mind boggles.

 

[NevermoreLenore]

Can you understand my position here? I try explaining to my daughter why its prudent to follow church mandates and canons (which gives the church authority to make adjustments during times liks this) I am trying to get them to understand and respect the wisdom of honest scientists and their health guidelines so long as they are not over burdensome to her and her responses sound something like “well mom says…and my church says… and they think its a nefarious overblown communistic plot”. Can you see how this could be a struggle for me as a parent?

I really don’t envy your situation. I’m so sorry your ex wife refuses to coparent so as to provide united parental instruction. That must be incredibly confusing to your daughter. I don’t think that pursuing discussions with your ex will have any productive or positive effect, an May in fact cause her to double down on her dismissive attitudes and practices. What you can do is provide consistency when your daughter is with you and maintain the principles which underlie your stance on COVID–obedience and respect to authority (the Church, the government, and you as her parent) with an emphasis on the Christian virtue of charity and loving others as Jesus does by protecting the vulnerable.

May God bless your efforts and touch your daughter’s heart that she understands the lessons you’re trying to impart. Even if it takes some time, hopefully your consistency and steadfastness of living the faith will impact her life significantly. The impact a father has upon a daughter is significant and I applaud the seriousness with which you view your parental role. I, too, had a father (now gone twelve years) who lived his faith and provided a consistent example of steadfast faith, perseverance in great suffering, and Christian charity. His life of faith was a beacon and an anchor that still impacts me today and informs how I now parent my own children.