It should be quiet in church before Mass begins and after Mass is over

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In my home parish in Ireland it is always silent before Mass. I was brought up to genuflect, kneel down and greet Jesus in the tabernacle and to pray to Him until Mass began.
However in my London parish, people feel free to have a good old chat with their neighbour and catch up on their social lives before and after Mass. They seem to have no recognition of the Real Presence, and I’ve noticed many people who don’t even pray after receiving Communion, but sit up and read the weekly newsletter instead. A** nun once said to me that she thinks that people don’t truly believe in the Real Presence or they would behave differently and I think she is right.** There are a lot of people going through the motions and think just following the form of the religion is going to guarantee them a place in heaven. Maybe our clergy should be making quite clear to them how they should be behaving and why?
I’ve said this before: If we really believed in the Real Presence, then as soon as the priest had said the words, the rubrics would be out the window, and we’d all be on our faces begging for mercy.
 
Must be a modern disease present in only certain churches. All the ones I’ve visited were so quiet (both before and during mass) that you could literally hear a pin drop. And when that pin drops, it echoes off the old stone walls!
 
I’ve said this before: If we really believed in the Real Presence, then as soon as the priest had said the words, the rubrics would be out the window, and we’d all be on our faces begging for mercy.
I truly believe in the Real Presence. However, my human mind cannot fully comprehend it. Do not assume that because I’m not on my face begging for mercy, that I’m not doing so kneeling in my pew. What is in my heart cannot be seen fully by human eyes.

So, are you saying you don’t believe in the Real Presence? Or are you saying that you are on your face on the floor at Mass?
 
We have a set-up as you describe. It’s like a giant amphitheater. The noise is huge from the narthex…often disrupting the Mass. In addition we have a very large immersion cruciform font in the center of it. Making it a fairly useless space for anything else.
When we pipe the sound out into the Narthex, the effect is deafening. Sounds good, but seldom works unless you have double sets of doors. The ushers like to keep the doors open…so all that noise is clearly heard in the nave. We’ve tried to change the mind-set…but people see it as a “friendly” issue…not a conducive to Catholic prayer one. 😦
Oh my gosh,ours is similar and not conducive at all. I’ve struggled with it a lot over the past year or so. It seems like the ‘traditional’ style churches without a narthex that I have attended are much quieter than those with a narthex. My husband is an usher, and tries to keep the doors closed, but others keep opening them.

One Sunday we tried praying in the Adoration Chapel across the street before Mass, but the prayerful silence that we acquired in doing so was quite disrupted by the navigation of the narthex. Another time, the ‘silence’ even in the Adoration Chapel was not there, for a group/family came in and prayed quite loudly, with great disregard to the others in the Chapel.

I personally think people are afraid of silence. Afraid of what they might hear. They have to block out the conscience, the voice of God. I know that before I returned to the Church, my TV or radio were always on; after returning, I have spent more time in silence and quiet, than ever. Not necessarily in prayer, but just quiet.

Be still my heart and mind, so that I might hear Your Voice.

Thanks be to God for having granted me a Grace and skill that I have lacked my entire life: I am becoming more able to block out some distractions better than I used to, at Mass. Not all, however, just some.
 
"people are afraid of silence".

YES.
This is it. They are afraid of prayer. What do I say? Am I doing it right? What if God tells me something hard? What if God wants me to do something? What if what if what if.
Yes. People are afraid of silence. We spend a lot of time in our culture filling up space, filling up time, filling our heads. We are more connected to each other than ever before, but very disconnected from God.
 
I said yes but I would like total silence coming in. I like to come to mass 30 mins early for some quiet reflective time as well as to get good seats (if you don’t come early you don’t get a good seat). I just like quiet for a bit before mass, but after mass I am usually quiet leaving but I don’t mind too much since it is usually people going home. However some people do like to stay afterwards for a bit and I can understand why silence is wanted. I think we should remain respectful to others and socialize outside and not inside
 
Before, yes. I think that’s appropriate and helps get the mind focused on prayer. After Mass, no. Mass is a celebration, not a funeral (well, unless it actually is a funeral). We should be leaving with joy.
 
After Mass, no. Mass is a celebration, not a funeral (well, unless it actually is a funeral). We should be leaving with joy.
“With joy” does not require being boisterous. Some of the moments of greatest joy in my life have included silent weeping. When I first held each of my kids, I didn’t jump up and call to people down the hall. I sat in silent awe while my heart nearly burst with joy. If the nurses had sat there and clapped for the doctor’s performance or called across the room about going and getting a beer after the game I might have throttled them.

Would any here really walk into an adoration chapel and talk to each other about the big BBQ while someone is there praying? In a world filled with noise is it really too much to ask that we have quiet to be with the Lord. Christ is present in the tabernacle just as much as the adoration chapel so why should we treat the nave any differently then the chapel?

I don’t mind quiet conversation, but rarely is the “joyful conversation” I hear leaving about God.
 
I couldn’t vote because of some of the comments made before mine. I do think that beforehand, there should be what I call a “reverent quietude” - meaning not absolutely silence due to perhaps a rosary group praying or maybe the organ playing a soft prelude or a choir singing a prayerful prelude.

After mass, I don’t have a problem with people being a little more talkative, especially when the postlude is playing a joyous piece of music. I see it from where I stand as a cantor and there is often so much joy or at least a happiness in people’s faces. At the parishes where I regularly work, most of the congregation will stay until the last verse of the recessional hymn is sung. I think that people want to have some sort of “fellowship”. Most of the time, they will take it outside if it is a nice day. That said, I’ve been in churches where people have been particularly loud and boisterous and it is just too much for inside of a church. It also encourages my children to be particularly loud and I’m trying so hard to teach them that we are “in God’s house” and need to be respectful of His home.
 
I don’t understand this? Why do we need to clap for the choir at all?

…(snip)…
We don’t… and I say this as a church musician who as worked in church music, mainly in Catholic churches, for almost my entire life. I know I can say this for myself and most of my colleagues who I work with and know and have discussed at different time. (I can’t speak for those I know personally or work with). While the sentiment is appreciated, we DON’T want any kind of special outward consideration or applause. We are there for the mass and to help with the prayer. We aren’t there for our own benefit or adulation. It takes away from what just happened at the mass and puts focus on the earthly rather than the Divine.

For me, it’s embarrassing. It brings unwanted attention. It makes me feel uncomfortable. I have a hard enough time dealing with individual compliments after mass or during the week if I run into people doing regular errands. I can handle those because their are more private. Whenever there is applause, those, all I want to do is either duck down so that no one can see me in the choir loft or hide behind the music stand. Fortunately, the congregations at the places where I normally work are typically “quiet” congregants and while we do receive very good feedback given to the priest or to us directly, they usually know well enough not to clap after mass. When it does happen is after a major holiday where we have many more visitors.
 
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