Ive been feeling animosity lately from church members,

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pwlj_christ87

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I dont know what it is , but , im a sinner, and im coming through the grace of God to acknowledge that , im trying not to be so high and mighty, i try to go to confession and I do twice a week, but lately i feel like ive been getting animosity from church members, sometimes it bothers me tremendously, sometimes, i feel like because im not in a family, because im single, perhaps im not so “striaght arrow”, that i dont belong in such a conservative church, and i know this is the main reason why my classmates and freinds my age, age 28-33 dont go to church becuase they feel this way too, well, i know what the sacrament is like i know i need it, and i cant be bothered going forward to church, i hate to complain too, and i dont want to church hop
 
the church is supposed to set you straight make you get on your way, i feel disrespected by clergy im sorry,
 
Would you be willing to be more specific?

PM me if you want.
 
Do you think you might be picking up on their concern that you might be scrupulous? I go to confession once a week and even then I think my confessor thinks I’m scrupulous, and I do probably border on it myself. He’s not disrespectful, and he’ll say to me that if I feel drawn by the spirit to confess something that I should, but he also will counsel me to not be so hard on myself which I guess I could misinterpret except I know it’s coming from a place of love.
 
AKDee said:
Do you think you might be picking up on their concern that you might be scrupulous? I go to confession once a week and even then I think my confessor thinks I’m scrupulous, and I do probably border on it myself. He’s not disrespectful, and he’ll say to me that if I feel drawn by the spirit to confess something that I should, but he also will counsel me to not be so hard on myself which I guess I could misinterpret except I know it’s coming from a place of love.
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If you think you are scrupulous, I think you really need to meet with a priest outside of Confession.
 
pwlj_christ87 said:
I dont know what it is , but , im a sinner, and im coming through the grace of God to acknowledge that , im trying not to be so high and mighty, i try to go to confession and I do twice a week, but lately i feel like ive been getting animosity from church members, sometimes it bothers me tremendously, sometimes, i feel like because im not in a family, because im single, perhaps im not so “striaght arrow”, that i dont belong in such a conservative church, and i know this is the main reason why my classmates and freinds my age, age 28-33 dont go to church becuase they feel this way too, well, i know what the sacrament is like i know i need it, and i cant be bothered going forward to church, i hate to complain too, and i dont want to church hop
Click to expand...
without going into specifics I will say I understand where you are coming from. I am 63 and feel that way. I go because I like to hear the words Blessed Are Those Called to the Supper of the Lamb. I need grace and blessings, but I feel very restricted and unhappy if I find myself trying to conform to the other way people are in church. I am divorced. And there is a lot of gossip-which I do not like. do you have a spiritual director?
 
No one should go to church looking for
the acceptance of others,
we go to worship God.

And when you make it to Heaven
and realise that it was these, same people,
that prayed very hard for you to make it, then what?

Everyone of them has concerns, fears and longings just as you do.
Open your heart to them, calm down and pray for those who concern you.
It will be alright.

:tiphat:
 
SuperLuigi said:
If you think you are scrupulous, I think you really need to meet with a priest outside of Confession.
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I am sorry if this is a hijacking of the thread, but I have no idea what the word “scrupulous” means in this context. In normal secular usage, to be scrupulous means to be be careful in your dealings with your obligations, to be extremely honest and exacting. But that is certainly not what is being meant here.

To the OP: I am sorry that you are not being welcomed into your local church with warmth and love. We are all sinners, and the Lord wants you to return to the fold. Perhaps you can speak to someone at the church’s office about what you are experiencing. If you speak with one of the lay personnel, maybe even one of the ushers at the services you like to attend, perhaps someone can introduce you to some of the congregants, and perhaps just being introduced to a few of the members might make you feel less of a stranger and might help you feel more welcome.

I am sure that there are plenty of opportunities to get involved, to get to meet some of the other church members, and to become part of the parish community.

I hope you find yourself more at ease, and more welcome.
 
I don’t know man. This is pretty open. Do you have a specific? Something to help a guy to know how deep this flows?
 
thanks for all the comments of concern they are appreciated, i guess i can and should delve into more detail, i perhaps have been scrupulous, but my main negation of feelings come from the fact that i feel certain clergy look down upon me, as in there may be a look of disgust at key moments , i sometimes feel dragged into going to mass because im the only one my age going, i look around the pews and see families and sometimes say why do i bother, that being said, i have tasted the glory of gods goodness in a severe manner and i wont stop going to mass,

for example

i went to confession, and in cnfession, it feels likei cant even say what ive done wrnog, because i get this look like im crazy from the priest, and hes like “Oh boy you really gotta get out there” whell, if i was out there i probably wouldnt be sitting in the confessional,

i was handed the holy eucharist the other day by the same priest and he gave it to me in a manner like here go away , i try to smile all the time and be nice but it bothers me to know im a good person and others look down on you

it might be a european difference
 
I’m sorry this is happening. I believe it’s important for all people in a parish to be welcoming to one another because there is a risk there of alienating someone from the Church- and in effect, from God- and there’s that saying about the millstone and the sea that applies there, I think.

My suggestion is this: Make an appointment outside of Confession to speak with the priest, ideally the one you confess to if there is more than one priest. Tell him what you told us and ssk him what’s going on.
 
Purgatory_Pete said:
No one should go to church looking for
the acceptance of others,
we go to worship God.

And when you make it to Heaven
and realise that it was these, same people,
that prayed very hard for you to make it, then what?

Everyone of them has concerns, fears and longings just as you do.
Open your heart to them, calm down and pray for those who concern you.
It will be alright.

:tiphat:
Click to expand...
Beautifully said, and I agree.
Peace be yours.
 
pwlj_christ87 said:
thanks for all the comments of concern they are appreciated, i guess i can and should delve into more detail, i perhaps have been scrupulous, but my main negation of feelings come from the fact that i feel certain clergy look down upon me, as in there may be a look of disgust at key moments , i sometimes feel dragged into going to mass because im the only one my age going, i look around the pews and see families and sometimes say why do i bother, that being said, i have tasted the glory of gods goodness in a severe manner and i wont stop going to mass,

for example

i went to confession, and in cnfession, it feels likei cant even say what ive done wrnog, because i get this look like im crazy from the priest, and hes like “Oh boy you really gotta get out there” whell, if i was out there i probably wouldnt be sitting in the confessional,

i was handed the holy eucharist the other day by the same priest and he gave it to me in a manner like here go away , i try to smile all the time and be nice but it bothers me to know im a good person and others look down on you

it might be a european difference
Click to expand...
Did it ever occur to you that you might just be paranoid? Everything you said is your impression of what other people think of you. Unless they actually said something to you, how do you know that they feel this way?

Every face has a story behind it. You are not alone. Do what you know is right and go to confession and Mass as you should. Trust me, no one else is concerned about what you are thinking, anymore than you should be concerned about what they are thinking.
 
you guys are probably right, today i had the chance to confess to him, and he seems liek a concerned pastor that is loving so it was my false accusations against him possibly, he is very stern but im also stubborn so when i reflected irealized i should actually take his advvise, open up to others, change my life, etc. sometimes im not used to harsh stern words
 
pwlj_christ87 said:
you guys are probably right, today i had the chance to confess to him, and he seems liek a concerned pastor that is loving so it was my false accusations against him possibly, he is very stern but im also stubborn so when i reflected irealized i should actually take his advvise, open up to others, change my life, etc. sometimes im not used to harsh stern words
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[SIGN]“Spare the rod, spoil the child”![/SIGN]
A harsh word is usually out of Love and concern for you. 👍

come to think of it my wife must be really, really concerned for me. 😉

These beautiful people love you and show it the best they can,
accept their love (in all its forms) and let it gently nourish
the seeds within. Today it has sprouted into a healthy seedling,
be patient little oak, you will get there, God willing, and you will be mighty.
:tiphat:
 
29 October 2015
Pope Francis homily at the Santa Marta residence
Vatican Radio:

God can only love and not condemn

What you are experiencing is not from God. not from God. Put on armor , pray for protection, receive the sacraments …that is from God.

A prayer esp after receiving Jesus in the Eucharist

Anima Christi

Soul of Christ, sanctify me.
Body of Christ, save me.
Blood of Christ, inebriate me.
Water from the side of Christ, wash me.
Passion of Christ, strengthen me.
O Good Jesus, hear me.
Within Thy wounds hide me.
Suffer me not to be separated from thee.
From the malignant enemy defend me.
In the hour of my death call me.
And bid me come unto Thee,
That with all Thy saints,
I may praise thee
Forever and ever.
Amen.

God Bless, peace and good~
 
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