Jealousy within a Friendship

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CRATUS

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How can I not fear? My buddy and I applied for the same job once. I got it and she did not. We are in the similar situation again. I got in, she may not. I am afraid she will lash out at again. For the most part, she is kind person but she can be manipulative, lash out on others, and always place blame on others. After every argument, I tend to apologize. I am not effective at communicating myself, she uses this to her advantage. Somehow I become the perpetrator and I end up apologizing. Sometimes I feel like our friendship is not real - if the only way we can get along if she always has to be right. A lot of things have happened in the past. I know she does not get into this job, she will turn into a little monster. I hate being afraid of my friend or scared of my own success. Another thing, she does that truly irritates me, she is very honest person but a lot of which she corrects me on, she is a hypocrite about.
 
Just pray for her, always wish her the best in life and start to mingle with different people whom you feel at peace and comfortable with.
 
Time to find some new friends who don’t feel threatened by your success.
 
I had a ‘friend’ like that in college. She saw other people’s success as her own personal failure. I felt much better once that friendship ended. I recommend you do the same thing. Some people are toxic.
 
Oh dear…I had a boss like that once.
She is still holding court, and has destroyed countless lives.
Don’t get caught in THAT vortex!
Move on. If you get the job, congrats. If you don’t seek employment somewhere this person is NOT applying.

When you get a job in a new place, try hard to make new friends. New acquaintances, join a club, join a ministry at church. Anything to get out there and broaden your horizons.

Life’s too short to spend it worrying about someone who does not worry about YOU at all.

Peace.
 
If an employer chooses to hire you, it’s because you are what they need. It’s the employer’s choice, not yours. You have no control on who the employer hires. This friend of yours has some egodrama going on. Don’t buy into it. Don’t let anyone steal your peace of mind.
 
Mayita30 said:
Just pray for her, always wish her the best in life and start to mingle with different people whom you feel at peace and comfortable with.
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👍 I agree. Broaden your circle of friends and pray for her.
 
CRATUS said:
How can I not fear? My buddy and I applied for the same job once. I got it and she did not. We are in the similar situation again. I got in, she may not. I am afraid she will lash out at again. For the most part, she is kind person but she can be manipulative, lash out on others, and always place blame on others. After every argument, I tend to apologize. I am not effective at communicating myself, she uses this to her advantage. Somehow I become the perpetrator and I end up apologizing. Sometimes I feel like our friendship is not real - if the only way we can get along if she always has to be right. A lot of things have happened in the past. I know she does not get into this job, she will turn into a little monster. I hate being afraid of my friend or scared of my own success. Another thing, she does that truly irritates me, she is very honest person but a lot of which she corrects me on, she is a hypocrite about.
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Doesn’t sound like a true friend if you have to be scared of your friends reaction everytime you both apply for the same thing…im assuming if your friend was chosen and you weren’t you would be happy for your friend right?..well if your friend cant be happy for you when something good happens to you then something is wrong with your friendship…your friend should say congratulations and be happy for you…not lash out in jealousy…and you should not have to apologize for arguments your friend starts especially if you didn’t say anything that needs apologizing for…you sound almost like you give in way too easy to this friend…dont live like that…next time it happens walk away, if your friend doesn’t contact you with an apology then you have seen her true colours and know she isn’t a true friend to you after all
 
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