Join us--wear a head covering to Mass Oct 2

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A simple thing to wear a hat, scarf, veil, mantila, or my personal preference - a babushka! Wore one every day to school, sometimes it would be soaking wet when I arrived at Mass we all attended before school. So it took 40 years for the headcovering to go from absolutely being noticed if you weren’t, to being noticed if you do. Just another example in the ride downhill practicing our Faith. I am going to start covering my head again, it was a sign of reverence and respect that should never have been discouraged. Perhaps someone will wonder about it enough to feel a little reverence and respect at Mass and then zero in on WHO we are showing it to!
 
Well, who knows? I just might.

If I do wear a head covering, it will be because I’ve chosen to attend the Latin Mass downtown where ladies in head coverings are actually a pretty common sight. However, if I attend my home parish, or another nearby Novus Ordo parish, I will likely not wear a head covering.

Description of my head covering:

In 1980, I made a pilgrimage to Fatima, Portugal. On the trip I bought an absolutely BEAUTIFUL deep blue turquoise lace mantilla.

Which is exactly why I would feel more comfortable wearing it to the Latin Mass where I could blend in instead of the Novus Ordo Mass where I would stand out. Because simply put, I know myself and my motives. I love costumes, and used to dress up as various Star Trek characters at science fiction conventions. So if I were to wear my mantilla to a church where I’d get noticed for being different, I’d likely end up distracting myself from the Mass. However, at the Latin Mass where I’d be one among many and therefore nothing special, I feel I’d be able to enjoy the mantilla experience without the same temptation to vanity that I’d have where I’d be way more unique.

To those who wish to wear headcoverings on Oct. 2, hey, go for it! To those who don’t, hey, that’s fine too! Only each individual knows whether a headcovering will be for her personally a help or a hindrance.

~~ the phoenix
 
the phoenix
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I would feel more comfortable wearing it to the Latin Mass where I could blend in instead of the Novus Ordo Mass where I would stand out. Because simply put, I know myself and my motives.
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Ditto. Coverting from Orthodoxy, wearing one to an Eastern Rite Church is something I don’t even think about (other than kissing the veil as i put it on – as a sacramental). Don’t wear one any more when I go Western – too much of a distraction. The scowls I received from a number of priests while going back to my seat after Communion at a Chrism Mass in the Western church was enough to make me think twice about it. I now no longer wear the veil when visiting in the West. . . except on VERY formal occasions (i.e. Mass at the local western parish the day John Paul the Great passed – I didn’t care if it was a distraction, it seemed like an appropriate token of respect) or when I know there will be many others doing it (i.e. on First Saturdays at the Western parish that observes them in this area). Don’t know if I’m a coward. . . or . . .
 
Khoria,

Do the Eastern Catholics usually wear a head covering? Does it depend on the parish or which ritual church?
 
I don’t ordinarily wear a head covering, but maybe I will on Oct 2. If anyone asks, I’ll just say “Today is National Wear a Head Covering Day.” I don’t have a mantilla, so if I do wear a cover, it will be a wide-brimmed straw hat with a band of “flowers” made from shells. 🙂

I frankly don’t understand why other women give women who cover their heads a hard time. I just don’t get it. Maybe I’m missing the “mean catty woman” gene or something. I occasionally see women wearing a hat or a mantilla to Mass, and it has never occurred to me to think that they were trying to show off or be holier-than-thou. I always assumed it was just something they were called to do, and not that they were trying to pass judgement on anyone else.

Crazy Internet Junkies Society
Carrier of the Angelic Sparkles Sprinkle Bag
 
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CarolAnnSFO:
I
I frankly don’t understand why other women give women who cover their heads a hard time. I just don’t get it. Maybe I’m missing the “mean catty woman” gene or something. I occasionally see women wearing a hat or a mantilla to Mass, and it has never occurred to me to think that they were trying to show off or be holier-than-thou. I always assumed it was just something they were called to do, and not that they were trying to pass judgement on anyone else.
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I’m with you, Carol Ann. I have thought about it a lot since reading these threads and discovering how uncharitable women can be to each other. How I see it is that wearing a veil is no different that being called to other Church practices that are no longer mandatory.

Like fasting on Fridays, and abstaining from meat every Friday of the year. Another practice that some people still impose on themselves is the fast before Communion. Church law requires only a 1 hour fast, but many people still fast from the midnight before. None of these practices are required, but they are still acceptable and permitted by the Church. Except women don’t get openly criticized for following them.

The common misconception I have seen from those who oppose the wearing of the veil is that they think the women are disobeying the magisterium of the Church and trying to impose their way on other women.

I think the real difference between how women treat others who are called to these practices is that one can still follow the old Church teachings on fasting and abstaining without drawing attention to themselves, but put on a veil and suddenly you have become noticeable! To some women, this is the ultimate taboo - another woman drawing attention to herself! The outward sign of the veil makes these kind of women feel threatened and insecure. So they become hostile and attack. They think the veiled woman is openly stating that she is holier than others, simply because she is wearing something visible.
 
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paramedicgirl:
I’m with you, Carol Ann. I have thought about it a lot since reading these threads and discovering how uncharitable women can be to each other. How I see it is that wearing a veil is no different that being called to other Church practices that are no longer mandatory.

Like fasting on Fridays, and abstaining from meat every Friday of the year. Another practice that some people still impose on themselves is the fast before Communion. Church law requires only a 1 hour fast, but many people still fast from the midnight before. None of these practices are required, but they are still acceptable and permitted by the Church. Except women don’t get openly criticized for following them.

The common misconception I have seen from those who oppose the wearing of the veil is that they think the women are disobeying the magisterium of the Church and trying to impose their way on other women.

I think the real difference between how women treat others who are called to these practices is that one can still follow the old Church teachings on fasting and abstaining without drawing attention to themselves, but put on a veil and suddenly you have become noticeable! To some women, this is the ultimate taboo - another woman drawing attention to herself! The outward sign of the veil makes these kind of women feel threatened and insecure. So they become hostile and attack. They think the veiled woman is openly stating that she is holier than others, simply because she is wearing something visible.
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Oh, paramedicgirl, you have SO got it! You have put it all precisely into perspective. I couldn’t have said it better and I couldn’t add anything to it. Those other forms of optional ‘piety’ don’t show like the veil does, so there’s no reason to attack.

And CarolAnnSFO? I have no doubt that you are missing the ‘mean gene.’ I’ve never heard you say anything that was mean or divisive on this forum. You always seem to say good things about everyone. Bless you.

I’m anxious to see if anyone in my Parish wears some form of headcovering on October 2nd. If they do, I’ll suspect they are a CAF junkie. Dare I ask???
 
newsong said:
Poorly disguised boasting?

I’m curious about the proliferation of topics in which the poster announces that he or she performs such-and-such pious action or habit, and then asks all of us what we think about it. ie. “I pray this many times a day, I lower my head when I see liturgical abuses, I wear a mantilla,” etc.

Obviously, there’s nothing wrong with any of these practices. Why, then, create a post announcing your habit? Do you really want feedback or do you want us all to know that you are, for all appearances, a very holy person? If you believe that what you’re doing is right, then keep doing it; no one’s opinions should stop you. If you believe it might be ostentatious or uncharitable, then don’t do it. Regardless, if it’s not an obvious ethical matter, then it’s simply between you and God and it doesn’t require, to paraphrase the Gospels, a trumpet announcement in the streets.

Some topics are just “curiosity” polls and some involve real discussions where a question of moral conduct is debated, and I don’t refer to either of these. But quite a few topics are formulated in a way that doesn’t invite discussion at all, but seems to involve mere spiritual boasting.

Please believe I intend to attack no one. Really. And I don’t mean to appoint myself supervisor of post-appropriateness. But I’m just so puzzled by these topics. Any thoughts? Have I misunderstood them completely? :confused:
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Hey, newsong,

I’m flattered that you’d quote my post from a different thread “Poorly disguised posting”, but it’s probably a good idea to cite cut and paste jobs. Thanks! (That way you won’t get flamed if someone disagrees with it!)
 
What a wonderful idea! It takes a great amount of courage to have your head covered in Church! It is a shame that we have to feel embarrassed and criticised for doing such a beautiful act. It’s not like in our wear a head covering we are telling every woman she should too.
One more thing, it’s interesting that men have kept to their part by not wearing a hat in Churc, whereas we needed both options… :rolleyes:
 
I don’t mean to be a fish swimming outside of the school but this is one step I simply can’t make …at this time anyway. My hemlines have come down…way down…and my necklines have come way up…way up…and I have eliminated much of my bright colors and loudly printed fabrics and I always wear soft-quiet soled shoes but I cannot picture myself wearing a headcovering in church.

I need some real inspiration to go that far.
 
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contemplative:
I don’t mean to be a fish swimming outside of the school but this is one step I simply can’t make …at this time anyway. My hemlines have come down…way down…and my necklines have come way up…way up…and I have eliminated much of my bright colors and loudly printed fabrics and I always wear soft-quiet soled shoes but I cannot picture myself wearing a headcovering in church.

I need some real inspiration to go that far.
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No push here, but have you considered a wide headband?
 
Helen HansenPye:
I will be covered on 2 October.
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So here’s a running count to date:
Forest-Pine
grotto
cargopilot’s wife
Brenda V.
netmil(name removed by moderator)
BlestOne
athanasiusrc’s wife and daughters
Lorrie
Detroit Sue
tadly’s wife
Helen HansenPye

Maybe
snow_white
paramedicgirl
CarolAnnSFO
the phoenix
rayne89
RosaryLady
 
netmil(name removed by moderator):
No push here, but have you considered a wide headband?
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:rotfl:
I have a wide peach colored headband I use when I give myself a facial mask. I don’t think that will do. Do you have more inspiring suggestions or thoughts?
 
Where are women allowed to wear hats according to hat etiquette? Also, is a regular summer straw hat something that can be used as a headcovering at a TLM?

I was raised to take off any hat the instant I entered a church or a number of other places, so I’m stumped. When can women wear them, exactly? Do they ever have to take them off?
 
Forest-Pine, have you found something yet? I read through the post today and saw that you were still having trouble finding something inexpensive and you don’t want a Mantilla or Chapel Veil. Have you checked out your local Target, Wal-Mart or similar store in their accessories department for a simple scarf? I know that both Target and Wal-Marts have scarfs that can be worn as a scarf or head covering.

Don’t remember who suggested bobby pins and/or clippy barretts but I have the kind of hair that is very slippery and even these don’t stay in my hair 🙂 I can remember my mom putting multiple bobby pins in my hair with the chapel veil that it seemed there were more pins than veil and it would still slip right on off my head! LIke I said, I made some corcheted scarves that work really well - haven’t worn one since I moved to my new house so don’t even know if I can find one. Have to start looking though or make a new one!

For those who are crafty enough the one I designed was just a half granny square with a border and ties crocheted on. Really simple and if I can find one and I can figure out how to get a picture on here I will have my husband (the techno guy here) help me post it.

Brenda V.
 
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Pug:
Where are women allowed to wear hats according to hat etiquette? Also, is a regular summer straw hat something that can be used as a headcovering at a TLM?

I was raised to take off any hat the instant I entered a church or a number of other places, so I’m stumped. When can women wear them, exactly? Do they ever have to take them off?
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Men can wear a hat in public places but must remove them indoors. Synagogues are an exception. Here is a doozy: Hotel lobbies are considered public so a man can wear his hat. Elevators are considered residences and a man must remove his hat if a woman is present. Hotel halls are considered public and a man can doff his hat again. The hotel room is a residence and he again takes it off.

Women can wear hats anywhere but in a home. If a home is being used as a house of worship for a wedding or baptism, women can wear them inside there as well. The reason women can wear them when men cannot is presumably because women’s hats are more ornate and require too much work to take off and put on. If a woman wears a man’s style hat like a ballcap then men’s rules apply.

I don’t know about the cultural norms for TLMs, but theologically a straw hat would be sound. I’d keep in mind style more than material. You don’t want to look like you are going to a hoe down, but there are plenty of straw hats (some in this thread even) that I think would be fine.
 
Firstly, Khoria Anna, hail and well met! Thank you for sharing your experience. I know where you’re coming from! * friendly nod of introduction *

Now then. This thread is reminding me of stories. 🙂

For example, CarolAnnSFO’s mention of a “wide-brimmed straw hat with a band of ‘flowers’ made from shells” … (which sounds beautiful, btw) … reminds me of the time I wore an old-fashioned Easter bonnet to Mass one Easter Sunday. At the time, I had a Victorian-type floral print dress, and an INCREDIBLY HUGE wide-brimmed straw hat with a single maroon ribbon around the brim. The hat was actually a Revolutionary War era style that I’d bought from a vendor selling them on a blanket outside Old Fort Niagara at a historical re-enactment of the Siege Battle of 1759.

I’d always wanted to live the song "In your Easter Bonnet … " so wearing the straw hat to church was a must to celebrate the holiday. One or two family members thought I was being outlandishly silly or showy, but I held my ground because this was going to be FUN. 🙂 The only fear I had was that the hat was so humungously large, that the poor person stuck sitting behind me wouldn’t be able to see past it. However, on the way out the door after Mass, I was complimented on the hat by a friendly elderly couple who thought it was cute to see a young woman look so old-fashioned.

Then, Forest Pine’s mention of the rule that the only place women must not wear a hat is inside a home. Well, that certainly explains my uncle’s questioning of why I was wearing my favorite brown outdoors adventuring hat to the dinner table at grampa’s house. Actually, I wore it as an ice-breaker. It certainly worked! Uncle Bill, who’s a good-natured sort after all, gave me a jokingly stunned look before plunging in with “Who are you, Indiana Jones? You DO realize he was named after a DOG, don’t you?” 😃

At this time, I’m leaning more towards going to the Latin Mass and wearing the deep turquoise lace mantilla. The only reason I wouldn’t be able to is, it depends on which weekend in October my parents drive down from the Buffalo, NY area to visit me in Ohio. Dad’s in a wheelchair, so for convenience sake in getting to Mass, if they’re my guests that weekend, we’re going to end up at the Novus Ordo Mass just down the street from me instead of making a 35 - 40 minute drive downtown. My guess though is that I should be footloose and fancy free on October 2nd, since no concrete travel plans were made.

~~ the phoenix
 
Brenda V.:
Forest-Pine, have you found something yet? I read through the post today and saw that you were still having trouble finding something inexpensive and you don’t want a Mantilla or Chapel Veil. Have you checked out your local Target, Wal-Mart or similar store in their accessories department for a simple scarf? I know that both Target and Wal-Marts have scarfs that can be worn as a scarf or head covering.

Don’t remember who suggested bobby pins and/or clippy barretts but I have the kind of hair that is very slippery and even these don’t stay in my hair 🙂 I can remember my mom putting multiple bobby pins in my hair with the chapel veil that it seemed there were more pins than veil and it would still slip right on off my head! LIke I said, I made some corcheted scarves that work really well - haven’t worn one since I moved to my new house so don’t even know if I can find one. Have to start looking though or make a new one!

For those who are crafty enough the one I designed was just a half granny square with a border and ties crocheted on. Really simple and if I can find one and I can figure out how to get a picture on here I will have my husband (the techno guy here) help me post it.

Brenda V.
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No. Still searching. I have several scarves but would prefer a hat. I haven’t had a chance to go looking but plan to during the week. I checked Target’s website–doesn’t look too good. Maybe a dept store? I dunno. I despise shopping…
 
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