Joined a new parish--now I might want to change?

[rciadan]

I see both points. I think in OP’s situation, if she were considering to send her children to a Protestant church for some sort of entertainment, etc, but however, she is talking about ANOTHER Catholic Church, nothing is wrong, IMHO, for her to want to travel another 10 minutes so that she feels more fit in and more fed in comparsion to her other parish. Yes, this is Protestant thinking, I’ve been a Protestant Bouncer for years, seeking the right place and yes, to be honest, if I had two different Catholic Parishes to choose from, I too would seek out the one that most fits the needs of my family.

But I do see you point. And it just may have been God’s will for whatevergirl to end up at the other Parish…never know.

I should have been clearer. I was referring to the concept that it is our “responsibility” to go where we feel most fed. I go to more than one parish, though I am registered at my local one. I praise God that our Catholic family encompasses more than just those that attend Mass at this one particular address! This is something we have that the Protestants don’t! My point is: if you are considering changing your registration, make sure you have discerned it to be God’s will and not just because you “feel” better at the other. It may be that God wants you to get involved and help to enliven the parish you are presently at. It may be that you are called to fight the abuses that may be occurring where you are. Emotions alone are not a good enough reason to switch,IMHO.
The Protestant thinking I was referring to is going from parish to parish looking for what YOU are going to get from going to Church. We go to Church to GIVE, not to GET. This is dangerous because: what happens when you go to all the local parishes and you “feel” you are not getting what you want? Do you go next to the Calvary Chapel where they have "contemorary worship services with entertainments and lively music? What about when your kids tell you they want to go to the Pentecostal Church where it is exciting? If you have “shopped around” looking for a parish based on nothing other than if you feel “fed”, what do you say to them?
The Saints never went anywhere based on emotional decisions and they went to Mass whether they “felt fed” or not. They prayed and asked God to show them where to go to serve, not where to go to be served.
We are to emulate them: *not the Protestants who keep looking for what Church will **give *them.

 

[mamacita]

**Hey Whatevergirl!!

Just wanted to say that our pastor is the same way after Mass!! My DS (9) will go up to him and say ‘hi’ to just get a wave back as he is looking the other way and talking to the ‘older’ people. It is kinda disturbing because my DS looks up to him. He also is very sarcastic, but in a way it is kind of funny at times.

However, the associate priest is awesome!!  He knows my son by name and always stops and says 'hi' to US before we even get a chance to approach him!!  He is so kind, he is the one that delivered dinner to our door when my kids were sick and DH was living out of town.     We wouldn't change parishes over the pastor though because we really feel like a part of the community at our parish.

Our DS is not returning to school there and the pastor actually stopped my DH last weekend when he was leaving Adoration and asked him about why we are not returning, so in a way, he does care, but he just gets so many hellos after Mass I guess that he doesn’t take the time to stop and smell the roses, he runs off pretty quickly after saying hello to a few parishioners which is disappointing in my opinion.

Basically, if I were you, I wouldn’t change parishes, especially if you like the women in your women’s group. **

 

[whatevergirl]

thanks for your post, mamacita…I can see I’m not alone in feeling this way! I don’t mean to appear petty…I just think to how myself sometimes-- Christ Himself had time to heal people…certainly a priest should pay attention to who is taking the time to stop and say hello to him. But…But…he wrote back to me today…in an email…he is taking requests for weekday mass times to accomdate the parish, and he wrote me back rather quickly. Maybe I’ll just email him from now on.

I really like to grow close to our parish priests…it’s what keeps us guided, as well as the Holy Spirit.

 

[whatevergirl]

…and the associate priests are also very attentive. I don’t need attention…lol…I sound like a baby. I just would like to know I’m not a ‘number’, you know?

My husband was a bit miffed that he won’t come to bless our home–that he directs the blessings of homes to the associate priests…my dh said…‘is he too good for this now?’ Yikes–we are a tough group to please. We need to work on patience, I think.

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

My husband was a bit miffed that he won’t come to bless our home–that he directs the blessings of homes to the associate priests…my dh said…‘is he too good for this now?’ Yikes–we are a tough group to please. We need to work on patience, I think.

I think being a pastor has to be one of the hardest jobs there is. There may be things they love to do that really fulfill them as priests, but they have so much other work that only the pastor can handle that they can’t fit in the “fun” things.

 

[whatevergirl]

I think being a pastor has to be one of the hardest jobs there is. There may be things they love to do that really fulfill them as priests, but they have so much other work that only the pastor can handle that they can’t fit in the “fun” things.

i agree…my husband is a tough nut to crack sometimes…but he’ll have to accept it. I explain to him that priests are stretched very thin these days.

 

[Sr_Sally]

Technically this is still true. Each parish has a boundry (like a school district) and ALL the people who live within that boundry belong to that parish (even the non-Catholics).

That said, I do think that people are more ‘loose’ about it now–especially since people seem to move more and certainly people who are converting into the faith. If I converted because of the influence of a particular friend, I would be likely to want to join their parish even if it wasn’t my home parish.

In my area, we have many Catholic churches–I have 4 within a ten-minute drive of my house. We do not belong to the parish whose border we live within, simply because we know more people at the parish we do belong to. As reverts/converts a built-in support structure was important to us.

To the OP, I don’t think that your reasons are necessarily shallow. The priest’s personality when greeting him after Mass would not weigh with me too strongly, but the reverence of the Mass and the orthodoxy of the homilies and CCD teaching would matter a great deal. Also I would consider things like Mass times, CCD schedules, youth group programs, etc also before making a final decision.

Is this true?

When I was growing up, my parents said we were assigned a parish according to where we lived. There were lines, like school districts, and we belonged, according to the diocese, in a particular parish.

I remember her being very snippy when some friends left our church for another parish because they liked the priest. She said they were being like Protestants, just following the preacher who made them feel good, and that Catholics didn’t do that, but submitted to the authority of the Church and attended where they were told.

That may have been a regional thing, or something that is no longer done, or maybe she was just wrong about it, I don’t know. But I am often surprised when I read here than people “shop” for a particular type of parish or switch parishes freely, That was a big NO-NO where I grew up.