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I’ll start by saying Joseph certainly was quite a bit older than Mary. She was no older than about 16- the upper marrying age for Jewish girls at that time. Jewish men always got married at an older age. In your version of the story, though, in order for Joseph to have had time to be married, have at least six kids, and watch them all grow up to the point where they were on their own during the trip to Bethlehem and flight to Egypt, he must have been at least 55 or 60 years old. Your version of the story puts Mary in the care of a guy who’s older than her own father by plenty. How is that helpful? I know Joseph was older than Mary, but not THAT much older.Hey Mike,
Can you address the stuff I offered in my post and in the link to my reasons for accepting the Perpetual Virginity of the Blessed Virgin?
To this, I will point out that during Jesus’ years of ministry prior to His death, Mary is frequently listed along with Jesus’ brothers (and sisters, mentioned once). When she would go places, she would be “there with” them. Was she just hanging out with them? Or were they taking care of her in Jesus’ absence? I would say the latter. This continues after Jesus’ death, too.If Jesus had been the eldest among children then the others would have been responsible for taking care of their mother. This was not true of step children, who would not have had that responsibility.
Jesus’ siblings did not believe He was the Son of God until after His resurrection. It makes perfect sense for family members who believed him guilty and false to behave differently than family members who believed him innocent and truthful.If she had other kids they would’ve been there too [at the cross].
If Jesus’ claims were not true- which is exactly what his younger siblings believed- Jesus, in their eyes, would be guilty of something not just “virtually criminal,” but blasphemy punishable by death. It was pretty uncommon for a younger sibling to disrespect an elder, but it’s also not every day that your older brother claims to be God’s Son.Also, it was virtually criminal for a younger sibling to mock or rebuke the first born son
Let’s focus in on Jesus’ request to John in John 19:26-27.
Notice how Jesus talks to his mother first. If His primary intention was to give His mother into the care of John at his home, He probably would have talked to John first. As it is, He talks to His mother first. He gives her a son. There’s no way you can truly replace Jesus, but that was the idea behind the gesture. After that, Jesus told John to behold “thy mother.”
Then it says “And from that hour,” John took her to his own. You probably assume that means he took her home, but this cannot possibly be. It says “from that hour.” John’s home was a day and a half journey from that place, and we know both he and Mary stuck around at least until the Resurrection. So John did not take her home from that hour. Maybe you believe he did after that, but you surely can’t suggest that he did this “from that hour.” He did do something from that hour, though. He accepted her as his own mother, and she did the same in regarding him as her son. This does not necessarily mean John eventually took her exclusively into his care. There is no evidence that he did, and there is pretty good evidence that he did not.
The common Catholic complaint looks like this: “If Mary had other kids, wouldn’t they be really mad about Mary being given to the exclusive care of John?” Well, she wasn’t given to the exclusive care of John. I’ve already demonstrated that what he did “from that hour” could not entail taking her home, and I’ve suggested that Jesus’ request was neither intended nor understood to entail John exclusively taking over the responsibilities of caring for Mary. Acts 1 shows he did not.
Those present were Peter, John, James and Andrew…They all joined together constantly in prayer, along with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers.
First notice that John is listed among the disciples as usual and without a companionate link to Mary. Then Mary the mother of Jesus is named, once again listed with Jesus’ brothers. Just like in Matthew 12:46 and 13:55, Mark 3:31, Luke 8:19, and John 2:12, to name a few. If Jesus’ intention was to give Mary to the exclusive care of John, how do you account for the fact that there is no evidence of this actually happening and there is evidence that Mary continues to be with Jesus’ brothers just like during His ministry?
Did Mary and John misunderstand Jesus? Did they ignore Him? Or…here’s another option you should really consider…Perhaps you are the one who misunderstood Jesus. You thought He was giving Mary into the exclusive care of John, and you probably even thought John took her home. From that hour…yeah right. If by from that hour you mean after the resurrection, wait another forty days till the ascension, and THEN start on the day and a half trip…there are some pretty difficult interpretive requirements if you choose to go that route, my friend.
Anyway, here’s my contention: Mary and John did not misunderstand Jesus, and He did not mean to give Mary into John’s exclusive care. You misunderstood Jesus and they did not. Mary did indeed take John unto her as a son, and he took her as his mother. But he did not take her into his exclusive care, as we can see from Acts 1. And when all the disciples, including John, got together with Mary and Jesus’ brothers who were still with her, there was no tension because the imagined faux pas is truly only a product of your misunderstanding.