Just a rant

[lovedance4ever]

No one needs to respond to this, I just need to get it out.

I’m a sophomore in college. I have no friends, and have been bullied and used for as long as I can remember.

I feel like my only purpose in life is to be beat up on by others. “Don’t worry, sweetie, things will get better,” is just bull that your loved ones try to feed you…because it does not get better, it gets worse. I guess I’m repulsive. I guess there is absolutely nothing about me that can intrigue people. I guess the only worth I have is the temporary help I can provide for others.

I’m sick of being alone all of the time. On the weekends, I entertain myself by doing homework and wasting time online. No one EVER invites me to do anything, and when I do the inviting, I’m blown off. Why I keep going back for punishment, I’ll never know.

The worst part of it all is that I can find no comfort at church. I sing in our choir, where I experience quite a bit of bullying. I have wanted to leave our parish and find another one for a while, but my mom presses for me to stay because she likes the music. I’m stuck, alone, and cannot even find comfort in a place where I should feel welcomed and safe.

Why is it that “Christians” aren’t even Christian? Why is it that I have met Sikhs who were compassionate, when all of my so-called Christian “friends” were not? What is the world coming to? Are good people becoming extinct? I am not perfect by any means, but I believe I have a lot to offer in a friendship. Maybe I am meant to be alone, because things sure as hell are not getting any better.

There. Glad to have gotten that off my chest. Sorry to have wasted a space on here with this post.

 

[EasterJoy]

You aren’t sounding like somebody I’d be in a hurry to go to coffee with, let’s just say that.
Your post inspires fear: fear that this person will take me the wrong way, fear that this person is going to think I’m bullying her if I don’t avoid all conflict with her, fear that she is going to expect me alone to fulfill all her emotional needs. As a prospective friend, you don’t sound like someone I’d want to push around. To the contrary, you sound really high maintenance. (Did you take that as honest feedback, or did you take that as a put-down? Remember: I’m not telling you what you are. I’m telling you what fears came up in me as I imagined meeting someone who talks as you are talking. I’d be inching my way towards the door…) As it is, though, I can be honest with you, because you posted on an anonymous forum. Your rant was anonymous, my reply is anonymous, and we can both take what we want from this, leave the rest and good riddance to it.

The first thing I’m going to say is this, then: If you get advice that doesn’t help, move on to other ideas. It is no put-down to try something and decide that it doesn’t fit you. If anything in this doesn’t fit you, keep moving until you find someone who can help you.

If you’re in school, there is probably somewhere you can go for free counselling. Try that. Also, try prayer. After all, discouragement is literally when you get dis-couraged: you lose your belief that you can succeed. Prayer is a good source of courage.

I think that the counsellor may help you learn how to assert yourself without being aggressive. IOW, there is a lot of real estate between letting people manipulate you to do whatever they want you to do and being aggressive about what you expect from them. If you’ve only lived on one end or the other, you probably need some help in finding the happy middle ground, where you can be comfortable around others and they can be comfortable around you. It is out there, and you can find it.

If you just keep doing whatever it is you have been doing, you’re likely to keep getting the same result, you are right about that. If you don’t find a way to change your attitude, it is not going to get better. If you give off a vibe half as threatening as what you posted, you’re going to drive people away. If your problem is something totally different than what came across in your “just a rant”, then you’re still probably going to keep getting the same thing if you keep doing the same thing. It doesn’t have to be that way, but success requires that you not dwell on what is wrong, but decide what you want and figure out how to get it. That is up to you…including going out and getting whatever help you need to get what you’re looking for.

Get some courage, get some help, and you can turn things around. Get with it, because you’re right: Things won’t start changing until you do.

 

[lovedance4ever]

You aren’t sounding like somebody I’d be in a hurry to go to coffee with, let’s just say that.
Your post inspires fear: fear that this person will take me the wrong way, fear that this person is going to think I’m bullying her if I don’t avoid all conflict with her, fear that she is going to expect me alone to fulfill all her emotional needs. As a prospective friend, you don’t sound like someone I’d want to push around. To the contrary, you sound really high maintenance. (Did you take that as honest feedback, or did you take that as a put-down? Remember: I’m not telling you what you are. I’m telling you what fears came up in me as I imagined meeting someone who talks as you are talking. I’d be inching my way towards the door…) As it is, though, I can be honest with you, because you posted on an anonymous forum. Your rant was anonymous, my reply is anonymous, and we can both take what we want from this, leave the rest and good riddance to it.

The first thing I’m going to say is this, then: If you get advice that doesn’t help, move on to other ideas. It is no put-down to try something and decide that it doesn’t fit you. If anything in this doesn’t fit you, keep moving until you find someone who can help you.

If you’re in school, there is probably somewhere you can go for free counselling. Try that. Also, try prayer. After all, discouragement is literally when you get dis-couraged: you lose your belief that you can succeed. Prayer is a good source of courage.

I think that the counsellor may help you learn how to assert yourself without being aggressive. IOW, there is a lot of real estate between letting people manipulate you to do whatever they want you to do and being aggressive about what you expect from them. If you’ve only lived on one end or the other, you probably need some help in finding the happy middle ground, where you can be comfortable around others and they can be comfortable around you. It is out there, and you can find it.

If you just keep doing whatever it is you have been doing, you’re likely to keep getting the same result, you are right about that. If you don’t find a way to change your attitude, it is not going to get better. If you give off a vibe half as threatening as what you posted, you’re going to drive people away. If your problem is something totally different than what came across in your “just a rant”, then you’re still probably going to keep getting the same thing if you keep doing the same thing. It doesn’t have to be that way, but success requires that you not dwell on what is wrong, but decide what you want and figure out how to get it. That is up to you…including going out and getting whatever help you need to get what you’re looking for.

Get some courage, get some help, and you can turn things around. Get with it, because you’re right: Things won’t start changing until you do.

I believe I referred to this as a rant. I was venting.

Venting: “A means of escape or release from confinement; an outlet: to give vent to one’s anger.”

In other words, I was releasing emotion that is otherwise kept hidden. Ask anyone who knows me, and they will tell you that I am happy person.

This was a post by someone who is in a great deal of emotional pain, and to respond by stating that you would be afraid to have coffee with me does not help. Actually, my feelings do not manifest themselves in my physical appearance, making me look like an intimidating person; they manifest themselves as bitten-down fingernails, a fibromyalgia flare-up, and many tears, if you want to know.

I do not know why I even bothered asking for help on here. How is being judged this way any different from attending my church?

 

[WoundedIcon]

You aren’t sounding like somebody I’d be in a hurry to go to coffee with, let’s just say that.
Your post inspires fear: fear that this person will take me the wrong way, fear that this person is going to think I’m bullying her if I don’t avoid all conflict with her, fear that she is going to expect me alone to fulfill all her emotional needs. As a prospective friend, you don’t sound like someone I’d want to push around. To the contrary, you sound really high maintenance. (Did you take that as honest feedback, or did you take that as a put-down? Remember: I’m not telling you what you are. I’m telling you what fears came up in me as I imagined meeting someone who talks as you are talking. I’d be inching my way towards the door…) As it is, though, I can be honest with you, because you posted on an anonymous forum. Your rant was anonymous, my reply is anonymous, and we can both take what we want from this, leave the rest and good riddance to it.

The first thing I’m going to say is this, then: If you get advice that doesn’t help, move on to other ideas. It is no put-down to try something and decide that it doesn’t fit you. If anything in this doesn’t fit you, keep moving until you find someone who can help you.

If you’re in school, there is probably somewhere you can go for free counselling. Try that. Also, try prayer. After all, discouragement is literally when you get dis-couraged: you lose your belief that you can succeed. Prayer is a good source of courage.

I think that the counsellor may help you learn how to assert yourself without being aggressive. IOW, there is a lot of real estate between letting people manipulate you to do whatever they want you to do and being aggressive about what you expect from them. If you’ve only lived on one end or the other, you probably need some help in finding the happy middle ground, where you can be comfortable around others and they can be comfortable around you. It is out there, and you can find it.

If you just keep doing whatever it is you have been doing, you’re likely to keep getting the same result, you are right about that. If you don’t find a way to change your attitude, it is not going to get better. If you give off a vibe half as threatening as what you posted, you’re going to drive people away. If your problem is something totally different than what came across in your “just a rant”, then you’re still probably going to keep getting the same thing if you keep doing the same thing. It doesn’t have to be that way, but success requires that you not dwell on what is wrong, but decide what you want and figure out how to get it. That is up to you…including going out and getting whatever help you need to get what you’re looking for.

Get some courage, get some help, and you can turn things around. Get with it, because you’re right: Things won’t start changing until you do.

Wow. Just wow. You basically just rubbed lovedance4ever’s face in it. I’m sorry they had to hear that. That was basically victim blaming and gas-lighting. That rant was tame. They hardly sound like the anti-social needy misanthropist of a loser you’re making them out to be. They’re just bitter that they’ve been mistreated.

 

[WoundedIcon]

I believe I referred to this as a rant. I was venting.

Venting: “A means of escape or release from confinement; an outlet: to give vent to one’s anger.”

In other words, I was releasing emotion that is otherwise kept hidden. Ask anyone who knows me, and they will tell you that I am happy person.

This was a post by someone who is in a great deal of emotional pain, and to respond by stating that you would be afraid to have coffee with me does not help. Actually, my feelings do not manifest themselves in my physical appearance, making me look like an intimidating person; they manifest themselves as bitten-down fingernails, a fibromyalgia flare-up, and many tears, if you want to know.

I do not know why I even bothered asking for help on here. How is being judged this way any different from attending my church?

Churches have become social clubs where the bourgeoisie play normality police. Especially western ones. Why else would the sacrifice of the Mass turn into a warm fuzzy sentimental celebration of themselves as a community?

Ha, now you have me ranting!

 

[ChibiViolet]

I will pray for you. I also suggest that you pray yourself and you will most likely become happy no matter how people treat you. You can fill up some of that time spent “wasted on the internet” talking to God–maybe just telling Him how you feel and offering your suffering to Him to heal, or better yet, to help a good cause. When I’m in pain, I offer it to God in reparation for and to prevent sins against the Eucharist and whatever other cause He would wish me to offer it for Him.

God created you to love you and so you could love Him. What others think of you has nothing to do with your purpose.

 

[lovedance4ever]

Churches have become social clubs where the bourgeoisie play normality police. Especially western ones. Why else would the sacrifice of the Mass turn into a warm fuzzy sentimental celebration of themselves as a community?

Ha, now you have me ranting!

haha, I know what you are saying! I am actually talking about what goes on outside of Mass, because I also agree that socializing in church is inappropriate. My choir meets for practice, and that is when I experience a lot of it. It is just an unhappy environment, I do not know how else to put it.

Thank you for your post, as well as your defense of my little rant. It truly has been very difficult lately. These feelings aways come up when my birthday approaches (as it is now), and I am reminded of how I don’t have anyone to invite anywhere. Silly, I know. But that’s how I feel.

 

[EasterJoy]

I believe I referred to this as a rant. I was venting.

Venting: “A means of escape or release from confinement; an outlet: to give vent to one’s anger.”

In other words, I was releasing emotion that is otherwise kept hidden. Ask anyone who knows me, and they will tell you that I am happy person.

This was a post by someone who is in a great deal of emotional pain, and to respond by stating that you would be afraid to have coffee with me does not help. Actually, my feelings do not manifest themselves in my physical appearance, making me look like an intimidating person; they manifest themselves as bitten-down fingernails, a fibromyalgia flare-up, and many tears, if you want to know.

I do not know why I even bothered asking for help on here. How is being judged this way any different from attending my church?

Internet Forum: A Web site that provides an online exchange of information between people about a particular topic. It provides a venue for questions and answers and may be monitored to keep the content appropriate. Also called a “discussion board” or “discussion group”…

IOW, if you want to vent to the world without giving an opportunity for any responses to be posted that you don’t like, you’re going to have to indulge yourself with a blog of your own.

Is that really what you want?

You’re lying about your emotional state to everyone you know so that when they treat you like garbage you let them go on thinking you’re happy as a clam about it, and that makes you…what? Don’t let me judge you. You tell me. Is that honest? Is that treating yourself the way you’d treat anyone else? Would you let someone you love treat herself that way? Are these mind-readers who are bullying you?

The person telling me that you are a happy person who counts to me is you, not anyone who “knows” you…and do not be so sure that you’ve mowed down your fingernails to the nib without anyone noticing that you’re not the happiest person in the world. The rest of us are not necessarily as stupid as you think.

The truth is, you don’t think anyone knows you or that anyone likes you, and if that isn’t the truth, then you are not venting, you are making up lies right and left in order to throw yourself a big self-pity party and inviting everyone else to watch but not to touch the cake. If that satisfies you, then start your own blog and vent away, rant away, and beat your breast over how judged you are, but don’t expect anything to change.

If you are telling the truth about wanting things to change, though, the change needs to come from you. If you don’t want to do that, then no, things aren’t going to change, whether you vent or not. That would be a shame.

Get the whole world to understand precisely how miserable you are and what will you be? Still Miserable!! Quit defending the status quo that has you miserable. Dare to believe that you can be happy and dare to believe your own sense that it will not drop in your lap and that you don’t know what change to make. You need help, but you can do this, and in the end it will be you that accomplishes it. Do it!! Really!! Do it!!

Go see a counsellor and be willing to believe what the counsellor tells you. You might be depressed, you might be carrying around some false beliefs about what people around you are thinking, you might be any number of things. Get help, and keep at it. Your life can be better than this, but you have to take courage and you have to dare to go for it.

Otherwise, well, go ahead and vent. Just please don’t do a bait-and-switch by posting something like you did on a family life discussion forum.

 

[Delaine75]

My heart goes out to you. I completely understand the rant. I am praying for you. I cannot begin to say why people treat you so badly because I don’ t know you personally, but I know that no one deserves to be treated badly, or bullied or made to feel inferior for any reason. There are still good people out there, but sometimes you have to look a bit harder to find them among all the “bad” people. You are worthy of having good and genuine friends, you are worthy of being treated good, and you are worthy of having a good life. Hold your head up, keep your heart open and know that God has not given up on you so you shouldn’t give up, either!

 

[EasterJoy]

Wow. Just wow. You basically just rubbed lovedance4ever’s face in it. I’m sorry they had to hear that. That was basically victim blaming and gas-lighting. That rant was tame. They hardly sound like the anti-social needy misanthropist of a loser you’re making them out to be. They’re just bitter that they’ve been mistreated.

Ah. So if someone gets on here with a bitter rant, we’re supposed to say, “there, there, Sweetie, things will get better”…oh, wait, her mom does that, and where did it get her? She gets accused of feeding our dear OP “bull”. OP made it clear how she feels about “there, there”. OK, think I, she just had it. She wants to hear it straight.

I made the unfortunate mistake of believing her lament that she had had it up to here with well-meaning “there theres” and assurances that things would just get better on their own, but then I find that telling her that she needs to change nets me the same treatment as ol’ Mom. Are you telling me that what she really wants is for someone to say, “You’re right to blame everyone else because those people out there are why you’re unhappy. Bitterness and blame are appropriate!! You’re unhappy because of everyone else, and you are powerless to change it, and so let’s all sit in ashes and grieve that the rest of your life will inevitably go the same way.” Oh, and let’s not forget to have a game of pin the blame on the “the bourgeoisie” who like to “play normality police.”

*"To what shall I compare this generation? It is like children who sit in marketplaces and call to one another, ‘We played the flute for you, but you did not dance, we sang a dirge but you did not mourn.’ *Matt. 11:16-17

She said she didn’t want “there, there.” I told her she was entirely free to take what I said or leave it, and I stand by that. She can do what she wants with it, take it or leave it. May she be happy with whatever she chooses, and I mean that. Now I’m done.

 

[Regina_Love]

Well I would take you out to lunch if I could lovedance. I have felt just as you do now. I often didn’t fit in with my highschool & college friends. I was “too good” for them because I wasn’t into drugs, and sleeping around. Didn’t get invited to many parties. Of course that may have something to do with the fact that if some one got wasted, I messed with them. One guy, I painted his toe nails red. Another guy I shaved half of his leg. Then there was the felt pen art… Ha ha!

It can be an incredibly lonely time in life. I joined a new church & it was great. They had a bible study. We shared & got to know each other more deeply, not just superficial. I also sang at mass. We had a huge college aged youth group, 40-60 people. It turned out to be the best time of my life. We pledged to not date each other, just be friends, and learn about God. We did this for 2 years. Then I started dating a good Catholic man from the group. We’ve been married 27 years.

I will pray for you to meet some genuine friends. The world was blessed the day you were born! Happy Birthday Sister… :whacky:

 

[cmscms]

Well… I wouldn’t discredit the temporal help you can give others. Perhaps to you it is a boring choir but to some it may be awesome help

I can relate to church groups being unchristian. My mom is always saying ‘there was a judas among the 12 apostles’. However, I think in my life the ratio wasn’t 1 to 12 but more like 11 to 12

I had trouble making friends in school as well. I started to go to the gym alone and now, nothing drives me nuts more than going to the gym with someone. I am more of a loner and have come to realize I can actually do a lot of enjoyable things on my own.

Also, not everyone is courageous. As much as I know how you feel, and I hate going through it, I can’t help but think if I was in your choir, you might feel like I am not friendly.

Let me give you an example. I actually after years of searching have found a good group of catholics to hang out with. I am just starting to get to know them better. However, there is this one girl ‘Linda’ who has a particular soft spot (I won’t give the details). Once when she was not around, I heard people say ‘Did you see the fit Linda threw when Joe pushed her buttons?’. I felt like she was being knocked unfairly since everyone knows her soft spot yet they poke it anyways. I have actually seen people talk about it when she was not in the room and say ‘If Linda her this she would flip out’. I personally though that was CRUEL and uncatholic. I have tried once when Linda was not around to point out ‘Linda has so many qualities and is so kind to us. If all she asks is not to poke her soft spot, why as Catholics can we not accommodate her’. Well…that just fell on deaf ears. So I gave up. I make sure I don’t poke Linda but others don’t

So my point is, for all I know, you are Linda. You don’t realize that even though others agree with you… the sad truth is, very few people have the courage to stand up for you when the whole group is against them. And because these people bring me more good than harm, I don’t want to cause any fights with them.

So… that still does not tell you how to handle people. But I do hope it shows you that secretly, perhaps some people do sympathyze with you

CM

 

[Mayita30]

Hi lovedance

I hope you are feeling better now. The world isn’t that bad really , there are just some days when we feel down and depressed that we think that the whole world is too much to bear. Whenever this happens to you please bear in mind that Jesus told us to take up our cross daily.

I am curious. Are you lonely because you haven’t found your soul mate yet?

Make the most out of your life. I too didn’t have friends when I was in college. It was sort of my personality a few years ago but due to experiences and over the years, my personality changed and that helped me gain friends.

 

[Julia_Mae]

No one needs to respond to this, I just need to get it out.

I’m a sophomore in college. I have no friends, and have been bullied and used for as long as I can remember.

I feel like my only purpose in life is to be beat up on by others

BTDT. So, you are in college but living at home? You are a sophmore, so you are at least 19. You are an adult. Go d find another Parish, maybe something close to campus.

Now, however it is that we get the low self-esteem that leads to bullying, or the lack of social graces that don’t allow us to deal with it, or whatever,** it can be changed**.

This is the most important thing to know. This isn’t some curse you have to live with for the rest of your life. My recommendation is counseling, and if you are on a standard campus, there should be counselors.

A therapist will help you figure out what can change and how to enter into conversations and be part of instead of apart from. But first, you have to stop being mad at everyone about it, because the only one who can fix this is you. But you can. Takes a while,. Takes practice. Takes change. Sometimes scary change, but… it’s definitely worth it.

BTW, I was 30 before it really did get a whole whole lot better. Like, normal almost. Best get started so it doesn’t take you so long.

 

[underacloud]

Lovedance4ever,

I think most of us have been in some sort of rut at some time in our lives. I know I have. There’s nothing wrong with having a rant and I hope it helps you collect your thoughts. Now, try to work out what you can do to begin to work out of that rut.

You could look at this inwardly or outwardly…

Inwardly…what is it you can do to make yourself more friendly?..do you do anything that makes you a target for bullies? etc…

Outwardly…is it your church that’s in a rut? would trying a new church, even a few new churches, be helpful?

Ask some of these questions of yourself and your situation and hopefully you’ll see a few possiblities open up. All the best.

 

[George_Stegmeir]

With all due respect for what the others have told you. it seems to me that you have to gain some independance and be an adult. You can’t do this by being tied to mom by her apron strings.
One of the great domestic problems we have today is that too many mothers don’t want to lose their “little angel”- even though he may be 27 years old! And then there are those who find not having the responsibilities of paying rent and having to do for themselves is too much to give up.
Like it or not, this type of behavior on the part of one or both usually results in a stilted personality.
As for feeling alone, don’t worry about it…at your age it is largely the result of raging hormones! If you will calm down, and pay attention to what’s really important at your stage in life, your studies, you will benefit much more than the college gadfly with a harem of girlfriends. If you meet someone, be friendly with them first. If there is any attraction on their part, it will show in time. Otherwise, don’t worry about it. You have to let nature take its cource, you can’t force these things.
The ugly fact of life is, that the harder you look for romance or an intimate relationship, the less likely it is that you will find it!
As for the bullying, have the gumption to stand up to those idiots! What can they do to you? Hit you? If they do, then you can have them expelled from the choir…or even call a cop and press charges. All you have to do is have the grit to stand up to them one time and it will end. If you just go along and be mousey, it will continue and grow with a vengance. You have to realize that all bullies, regardless of sex, are cowards at heart.

 

[sacred_words]

Been down that road before. It’s no fun to say the least.

When someone shows you who they are, believe 'em the first time. Maybe it’s time to find some new friends? Leave the choir if that’s what it takes. It isn’t up to you to fix the people making fun of you, the onus is on God to do that instead. To me it sounds like the reason why you keep going back is that on some level, you hope that things will improve. Experience has taught me that it seldom works that way. You can’t stop jerks from being jerks, there’s no other way around it. They’re everywhere, one just needs to learn to spot 'em before they cause major misery.

Does your mom know the extent of what’s going on? Tell her if she doesn’t already know, and maybe you and her could check out other parishes together. Just a suggestion.

 

[Nimzovik]

No one needs to respond to this, I just need to get it out.

I’m a sophomore in college. I have no friends, and have been bullied and used for as long as I can remember.

I feel like my only purpose in life is to be beat up on by others. “Don’t worry, sweetie, things will get better,” is just bull that your loved ones try to feed you…because it does not get better, it gets worse. I guess I’m repulsive. I guess there is absolutely nothing about me that can intrigue people. I guess the only worth I have is the temporary help I can provide for others.

I’m sick of being alone all of the time. On the weekends, I entertain myself by doing homework and wasting time online. No one EVER invites me to do anything, and when I do the inviting, I’m blown off. Why I keep going back for punishment, I’ll never know.

The worst part of it all is that I can find no comfort at church. I sing in our choir, where I experience quite a bit of bullying. I have wanted to leave our parish and find another one for a while, but my mom presses for me to stay because she likes the music. I’m stuck, alone, and cannot even find comfort in a place where I should feel welcomed and safe.

Why is it that “Christians” aren’t even Christian? Why is it that I have met Sikhs who were compassionate, when all of my so-called Christian “friends” were not? What is the world coming to? Are good people becoming extinct? I am not perfect by any means, but I believe I have a lot to offer in a friendship. Maybe I am meant to be alone, because things sure as hell are not getting any better.

There. Glad to have gotten that off my chest. Sorry to have wasted a space on here with this post.

Great rant. I can see yur frustration.

Yes it seems quite wrong for you to be experiencing what you are experiencing.
Wish I had more to say.

 

[onjac]

No one needs to respond to this, I just need to get it out.

I’m a sophomore in college. I have no friends, and have been bullied and used for as long as I can remember.

I feel like my only purpose in life is to be beat up on by others. “Don’t worry, sweetie, things will get better,” is just bull that your loved ones try to feed you…because it does not get better, it gets worse. I guess I’m repulsive. I guess there is absolutely nothing about me that can intrigue people. I guess the only worth I have is the temporary help I can provide for others.

I’m sick of being alone all of the time. On the weekends, I entertain myself by doing homework and wasting time online. No one EVER invites me to do anything, and when I do the inviting, I’m blown off. Why I keep going back for punishment, I’ll never know.

The worst part of it all is that I can find no comfort at church. I sing in our choir, where I experience quite a bit of bullying. I have wanted to leave our parish and find another one for a while, but my mom presses for me to stay because she likes the music. I’m stuck, alone, and cannot even find comfort in a place where I should feel welcomed and safe.

Why is it that “Christians” aren’t even Christian? Why is it that I have met Sikhs who were compassionate, when all of my so-called Christian “friends” were not? What is the world coming to? Are good people becoming extinct? I am not perfect by any means, but I believe I have a lot to offer in a friendship. Maybe I am meant to be alone, because things sure as hell are not getting any better.

There. Glad to have gotten that off my chest. Sorry to have wasted a space on here with this post.

I’ve skimmed down the comments and saw some advice about seeing a counselor. I’m not you but I don’t know if I would recommend the same.

I actually felt the same way at times at college. And at church. Some friends that I thought were good ended up disappointing me. And the friends I really liked didn’t stay long (e.g. graduated or moved). I can say that good people aren’t extinct. But people aren’t perfect. It’s terrible but the thing is, you really have to keep “putting yourself” out there and showing the world your ‘best’. There will be some people who will blow you off (for no good reason) but I have met wonderful people just by randomly saying ‘hi’ and asking for directions. There’s a bit of truth to that saying which goes like, it’s easier for something to come find you than for you to go after it yourself.

But hey, you can pm and chat with me if that’s some sort of a consolation. We can be friends on the CAF. (Yea, that’s true that it’s not real life but hey, I can always lend an ear to what you have to say).

 

[Cryptic1]

I’m trying to find a place in the bible where Jesus took someone down who had just opened up to Him. While some posters might think they’re being “truthful” by speaking out in a straightforward manner, the truth is that, if such statements do not come from a place of love or compassion, they are more harmful than helpful. While the “truth” can set many a person free, it is Jesus’ truth, not our version of the truth, that lifts a person and breaks their chains of bondage. So, even well meaning attempts to help others, if not motivated by empthy or compassion, are fruitless.

“Venting” is often misunderstood. Sometimes the person in question just wants “free expression” of their feelings without judgment. This is difficult for many people because most feel they have to “fix” the person, but it is in acknowledging and and hearing the person out where real change and transformation can begin to take place.

While I understand this forum is a place of “open dialogue” and communication, I hope we can continue to discuss our diverse issues without the need to “take others” prisoner.

Jesus Rocks