BUT, we may not know all that is going on with this particular lady. We can say her behavior was rude, but if there is a health or mental issue that caused that behavior, then we cannot draw the conclusion that she in fact did sin. And like you already pointed out, only God knows her heart.
Awesome — you are, for, sure “da man.”
I have to disagree. Pushing someone around because you have had the same seat for a gazillion years is in n way charitable or Christlike.
IMO, it’s likely you over-reacted. Most people do not claim to have issues with anger.
Who can possibly pretend that answering with frustration, with confrontation,
Yes. Ok. But I still dont see how I over-reacted then? Was eventually moving an over-reaction? Huh? What on earth are you talking about?
Please man. You keep using this kinda language. My reaction! What reaction? Standing up and telling her I was sitting praying and then eventually moving? Where are you pulling this supposed ‘reaction’ and ‘over-reaction’ from?
You attempted to “reason with her,” to “confront her.”
**Absolutely. **
Good bye then.
Yes. Very mixed bag.Newstheman, uncharitable behavior would flip most people’s wigs. I’ve experienced it myself.
It’s ugly, and has no place in a house of worship.
The only thing to do is to forgive and forget, even if this older woman resumes her bad behavior towards others. Remember that we are called to pray for our enemies. It is in their best interest, so that in the future, they may correct their errors and repent.
As far as people judging your response to her rudeness, you did share it with others, and it is a mixed bag here. Keep that in mind
Well… You are clearly not understanding and making a mountain out of a molehill.
She may have a kind of OCD like problem. By showing humility and meekness in church Christ surely smiles on you.Well! I had a very sad and somewhat bizarre experience today at Mass. Let me explain.
A few of us go to Church 40minutes before Mass starts in order to say the rosary before Mass. There are about 5 of us, and we sit near each other but not exactly right next to each other. Anyway, we were halfway through to rosary, I was kneeling down in the usual place in the same pew I have been sitting in for some months. All of a sudden, I get a tap on my shoulder.
“Move up”, says a lady in her sixties that I did recognize but I hadn’t seen her at Mass in a while.
So I thought to myself oh she obviously wants to get in - and even though this Church sits about 250 people and there are currently 5 people in it now and you can choose anywhere to sit - I move my legs as one does so she can get past and sit next to me or wherever. She then says to me, “No, move”. Now, unfortunately I am an extremely confrontational person, and I stand up to everyone in the face of anything - something I am working on however! Anyway, I stood up and I tried my best, I said, “Sorry, but I am sitting here and there are many other places to sit”. This lady then gave me a stern look, and in her best Headmistress voice said, “My boy, I have been sitting here for years, now move”. I took my stuff, and sat far away. I continued the rosary, but not in peace. I was… I don’t know. I was shocked and sad more than anything. Usually that kind of thing makes me angry, and to be honest, if I wasn’t in Church I would have ignored her and just sat back down in my place. But I moved. I just thought this was unbelievable. I mean… It was actually bizarre. And she did it so rudely and gave me such an evil look. I mean seriously, she could have chosen anywhere along the rest of the pew, and anywhere in the other 80 pews in Church!
What would you have done? I felt very bad, I felt awful in fact, because instead of just moving up I stood up and said that I was sitting there, when I should have immediately just moved up and saved myself and her the trouble and the unsettling of our spirits before Mass. It kinda made me angry though too.
You opened this thread of mountain-molehill.
If I did feel (I probably wouldn’t, but I can “step in your shoes”) that I wanted to make a point with her (rather than a scene with her, which is what almost happened, it seems), I would take that after-Mass opportunity or some other church social opportunity to take her aside – such as at a church pot-luck? (we have these sometimes). I would bring her a dessert plate as an excuse to start a pleasant conversation with her, introduce yourself, tell her how delighted you are that she is one of the many who come early to pray the rosary with others. After “killing her with kindness,” I would gently mention that you understand she “really likes that seat in that pew.” That will probably get her to respond. She’ll either reinforce that (maybe vehemently), or ignore it. She might even deny it, out of embarrassment. In any case, a gentle remark might help her to see that her behavior has a strong effect on others. People don’t always respond interiorly in the same way that their public face reveals. The incident was public. She had a public “face” to protect. Perhaps the best way to be a non-enabler is to do so after-the-fact in some way like this. Making her aware, plus praying for her, will probably be more effectual in the long run than “standing your ground.”Unfortunately, she is definitely not mentally ill. She socializes with her older friends after Mass before driving home (alone). Most likely she isn’t mentally ill I would guess based on that behaviour. Probably a bit old and set in her ways but I don’t think as far as mentally ill
, but at least being good-humored about it. We make jokes after Mass about each person having his or her “assigned seat.” I’ve seen that in adult classrooms as well. (I agree with the amused priest that another poster referred to.) I have a “thing” about not being crowded. More than “assignment,” I need space. (Hey, Jesus went “apart from the crowd” to pray. ) So when it’s not truly necessary to squeeze into a row (but we’re practically getting intimate with each other 
), I move quietly, without incident, to another pew, with a little more room.Ok, and now you have gone way beyond “what would I have done” and you are pushing your own agenda and your own brand of appropriate behaviour at Mass.