Kind of depressed

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brycehecht

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Hi everyone. I don’t know if this is the right place to post this but I could really use some advice. I am 16 and will be going off to college in a few years. My dad is really supportive of my educational aspirations, but my mom tells me things like “be a kid” or “act 15.” It really bothers me. I think she resents my aspirations because she doesn’t put a ton of emphasis on education. I have a very high GPA and want to become either a Psychiatrist or Psychologist. By nature, I am a very structured person but am definitely ok with having fun and going off my schedule occasionally. I feel like she is holding me back from achieving my dreams and I don’t know how to get through this. Yes, I pray about it. Should I sacrifice my educational opportunities, dreams, and structured personality to please my mother?
 
Nope.

Go to school and/or get a job.

She probably isn’t ready for you to grow up and be an adult yet. But when you do reach adulthood she probably won’t be encouraging you to act 15 anymore.
I think she just doesn’t want the college hunt to totally consume you. She wants you to enjoy your youth before you wake up and are graduating from high school and moving off to college.

Keep doing what you’re doing. Tell her you want to go to college and are looking forward to the journey.
 
I feel like she is holding me back from achieving my dreams and I don’t know how to get through this.
How exactly is she holidng you back from achieving your dreams? I don’t see anything in your post that would “hold you back” from anything.
Should I sacrifice my educational opportunities, dreams, and structured personality to please my mother?
Again, not seeing anything that would require you to cast yourself off a cliff, metaphorically speaking.

Are you perhaps being a little melodramatic?
 
If you have a dream, pursuit it. Chase it with all you have. If you don’t have a dream, life will show you where to go. Nobody should study because the parents say that you must be that or this. When you build your life it is your life that you build, not your parents. And what ever you may end up doing for a meal, as long as you do the best you can, and do it with pride, you will have the best work on earth.
 
I think you are doing wonderful! Especially for someone your age…I have two teenagers and one preteen and I wish they were ambitious like you, lol! They are very much into their X-Box and games 🤷…but I know how your mother feels. My oldest just left the nest, and I miss him so…I really didn’t want to let him go, but at almost 19 years of age, it was time 😉 Keep on your course…and may God bless all your endeavors! 👍
 
Bryce: Some of the most successful people in life knew what they want from a young age and went after it. You do not need your mom’s approval to pursue your goals. It would be nice but is not something you can expect or depend on. It would be good to have a conversation with her about this and specifically ask if she is willing to be supportive, and if not, at least not be negative.
 
Perhaps your mom is concerned because she loves you. She mayn’t want to see you slaving away over books and thinks that may be you could smile a bit more. Really she might be very happy that you have a definate plan in mind and you are doing your best to achieve it. Let her see every now and then you know how to party and party hard. Our Mars Bar adverts are about work rest and play. People who work hard often forget about resting and playing hard too. Finding comfort in routine is nothing to be ashamed off. Just make sure that the routine includes fun and rest and that way you will more likely to achieve your goal before drying up with it all. Your mom may be picking up on your down bits and just wants you to know there is fun to be had even for the most serious. It harder to find for serious people but important to find. 👍
 
Your mum is not holding you back from your dreams. You’re 15 years old for goodness sake. Today has enough worries for you, why worry about the 2 years that you have yet to see? Truthfully, no one knows what the future holds. Only God knows. And your mum, being far wiser than you are due to age, knows what she’s talking about when she tells you to act your age. Remember, Jesus said: “Blessed are your Father, Lord of Heaven and Earth, for revealing the mysteries of the Kingdom to mere children.” ** (Matt 11:25)

When you’re 50, you’d wish you’re 15 again! So live one day at a time! Don’t worry abour your future. Have faith!
 
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