Knights of Columbus

[Memaw]

That is your opinion, but you are not in my marriage.

It is indeed a betrayal because she is against it. To do it, behind her back or with her knowledge is betrayal.

I also fully believe that God is aware of the situation, if he wasn’t he wouldn’t be God, and sees the heart of the matter, rather than outside appearance which only humans see.

Yes, I’m sure God is aware of it and HE is also aware it is breaking one of HIS Commandments, no matter what you call it. Really your are betraying yourself and God. Why do we think we can do as we please and then try to put God on the spot by thinking he’s OK with it. God Bless, Memaw

 

[lonegreywolf20]

Yes, I’m sure God is aware of it and HE is also aware it is breaking one of HIS Commandments, no matter what you call it. Really your are betraying yourself and God. Why do we think we can do as we please and then try to put God on the spot by thinking he’s OK with it. God Bless, Memaw

I’m sorry, but I disagree with you. I am not betraying God and myself and I will not betray my wife. As I said above, that is final.

 

[1ke]

That is your opinion, but you are not in my marriage.

You are correct. That is why I said “if it were me”.

It is indeed a betrayal because she is against it. To do it, behind her back or with her knowledge is betrayal.

Her being against something does not mean it is a “betrayal” on your part to go forward. She does not share your religious beliefs, you do not share hers. It is a matter of difference, not betrayal, to practice your faith fully and she to practice hers fully.

I also fully believe that God is aware of the situation, if he wasn’t he wouldn’t be God, and sees the heart of the matter, rather than outside appearance which only humans see.

I agree God sees our heart.

I think sometimes we like to think that there is a big fence around ourselves called “invincible ignorance” when really it is “self delusion”. We delude ourselves that God’s law doesn’t really apply to us in “this” situation or “that” situation and we presume he’ll just overlook our obstinence.

That is also my opinion.

 

[lonegreywolf20]

Her being against something does not mean it is a “betrayal” on your part to go forward. She does not share your religious beliefs, you do not share hers. It is a matter of difference, not betrayal, to practice your faith fully and she to practice hers fully.

It is indeed betrayal, I am sorry that you do not see or understand this.

 

[Memaw]

I will not betray my wife by getting a radical sanation, that is final.

I have explained that my wife will follow me when she sees commitment to the church and change in me. Joining the KofC is part of that commitment.

When she does join me in the Catholic church, we will do the con-validation.

If you have your mind so strongly made up, then why are you here asking us??? Why in the world would your wife even object to a “Radical Sanation?” She doesn’t have to do a thing and it won’t change her situation one bit. She can still go on as before. It’s you it would help. Can’t she see that" Is she betraying you??. God Bless. Memaw

 

[lonegreywolf20]

If you have your mind so strongly made up, then why are you here asking us??? Why in the world would your wife even object to a “Radical Sanation?” She doesn’t have to do a thing and it won’t change her situation one bit. She can still go on as before. It’s you it would help. Can’t she see that" Is she betraying you??. God Bless. Memaw

She is not betraying me, and like 1ke I am sorry that you do not see or understand why it is a betrayal against my wife.

I wasn’t asking anything. All I did was post that the Knights of Columbus will indeed accept me as a member.

 

[Memaw]

She is not betraying me, and like 1ke I am sorry that you do not see or understand why it is a betrayal against my wife.

I wasn’t asking anything. All I did was post that the Knights of Columbus will indeed accept me as a member.

Originally Posted by lonegreywolf20
I’m curious, in your opinion, is it better that I betray my wife by doing the radical sanation?

LGW,
I do believe you asked this question!! God Bless, Memaw

 

[lonegreywolf20]

Originally Posted by lonegreywolf20
I’m curious, in your opinion, is it better that I betray my wife by doing the radical sanation?

LGW,
I do believe you asked this question!! God Bless, Memaw

My mistake, I thought when you asked “If you have your mind so strongly made up, then why are you here asking us???” you were speaking of the OP.

My intent was not to ask a question, but share in the fact that I will be a Knight.

 

[Memaw]

My mistake, I thought when you asked “If you have your mind so strongly made up, then why are you here asking us???” you were speaking of the OP.

My intent was not to ask a question, but share in the fact that I will be a Knight.

You did have a question mark at the end of that sentence! Why would you even share that fact with us knowing you would get some flack for it. I don’t think I would be to proud of the fact that I was in the choir if I couldn’t sing. I would feel a wee bit uncomfortable. God Bless, Memaw

 

[lonegreywolf20]

You did have a question mark at the end of that sentence! Why would you even share that fact with us knowing you would get some flack for it. I don’t think I would be to proud of the fact that I was in the choir if I couldn’t sing. I would feel a wee bit uncomfortable. God Bless, Memaw

I was speaking of the OP. Op=Original Post. Yes, I did ask a question is a subsequent post, but that was not the intent of the thread as I said to you already.

I shared because it is something that I am happy about, and I forgot that there are people so willing to give flak online instead of sharing in that happiness.

I am not going to be uncomfortable because I do not believe that I am doing anything wrong. I am honoring my marriage vows to honor my wife. To do a radical sanation would betray that honor because it’s not something that she wants done.

You can disagree with me all you want, as can anyone else. You are all entitled to your opinion, which I do not have to listen to and come from not understanding the dynamics of my marriage.

 

[lonegreywolf20]

I have asked for this thread to be closed.

As there is no further reason for it to be open.

 

[TheWarriorMonk]

I would like to thank you though 1ke for reminding me why I was warned against fellow shipping with other Catholics online.

All “online Catholics” aren’t the same. Some of “us” like to tell people how it is, whether they like to hear it or not.

Those on the internet are not close to my marriage as other people, Catholics or otherwise have no real understanding of the dynamics of my marriage and the fine details such as why something like radical sanation would be a betrayal to my wife.

Some of us know a lot more about convalidation than you know. My wife and I sucked it up and did it for the benefit of our children.

That warning came from my priest when I talked with him about my marriage and what was being said on the internet.

It is true that many people do not know what they are talking about on the Internet, especially when it comes to the details of sacraments.

I will not betray my wife by getting a radical sanation, that is final.

I have explained that my wife will follow me when she sees commitment to the church and change in me. Joining the KofC is part of that commitment.

When she does join me in the Catholic church, we will do the con-validation.

If you refuse to get a radical sanation, then it is your choice to live outside of the Church. Don’t waste your time with the KofC. You are making a decision that will keep you out of the KofC, and you have no right to force them to accept your living situation…and they won’t.

As far as being in the KofC will somehow change your wife’s opinion on your marriage and the Church, that’s simply nonsense…it won’t change anything. That’s not the way healthy relationships work.

 

[lonegreywolf20]

All “online Catholics” aren’t the same. Some of “us” like to tell people how it is, whether they like to hear it or not.

Some of us know a lot more about convalidation than you know. My wife and I sucked it up and did it for the benefit of our children.

It is true that many people do not know what they are talking about on the Internet, especially when it comes to the details of sacraments.

If you refuse to get a radical sanation, then it is your choice to live outside of the Church. Don’t waste your time with the KofC. You are making a decision that will keep you out of the KofC, and you have no right to force them to accept your living situation…and they won’t.

As far as being in the KofC will somehow change your wife’s opinion on your marriage and the Church, that’s simply nonsense…it won’t change anything. That’s not the way healthy relationships work.

See, that is where you are wrong. I wasn’t asking if they will accept me in this thread. I have been given an application by a district deputy. I explained my situation to him, I even told him of the answers I was given when I asked here about joining several weeks ago, saying they will never let me be a member. He let me know that they will indeed accept me and that I can be a member. I didn’t force anyone to do anything.

Going behind your spouse’s back to do something, such as radical sanation, is not how healthy relationships work. Yet, that is what people keep responding with. Doing it with a spouse’s knowledge, even though it would be against their wishes, is not how healthy relationships work.

I cannot believe that people are advocating that I do that. I cannot believe that people are so quick to tell me to mess up my marriage like that and yes, I am very sure that it will mess up my marriage.

I will not do it. What I will do is wait for my wife to make the decision to follow me in her own time or says to me to get the radical sanation.

Since the mods will not shut down this thread, even though I am asked them to, I will not respond to anymore posts.

 

[TheWarriorMonk]

Going behind your spouse’s back to do something, such as radical sanation, is not how healthy relationships work. Yet, that is what people keep responding with. Doing it with a spouse’s knowledge, even though it would be against their wishes, is not how healthy relationships work.

Do you refuse to allow you wife to practice her religion?

If so, why not?

She won’t allow you to practice your religion to its fullest. She is placing her own personal opinions on a matter over and above yours, and if you don’t like it, well apparently that doesn’t matter.

Is that a healthy relationship?

I cannot believe that people are advocating that I do that. I cannot believe that people are so quick to tell me to mess up my marriage like that and yes, I am very sure that it will mess up my marriage.

It’s messed up already.

I will not do it.

Then man up, accept the consequences of your actions, and stop complaining about it.