Lack of Fellowship before and after Mass?

[ElToro]

If you want “fellowship”, then work hard to help develop it. I attend the 2nd biggest Parish in our Diocese (our church is larger than the Cathedral), and we have a TON of fellowship opportunities each and every week.

We have them because the people work hard to develop them. They don’t try once and give up, they keep on trying until they get what is needed.

As an example, one man wanted to get a Men’s Book Club started. he was turned down 11 times, everyone said there would be no interest. So, one Sunday he stood up at Coffee and Doughnuts, and asked, "Is anyone interested in forming a Men’s Book Club?

There are now 17 regular members, who meet once a month in the Parish library.

You want fellowship, then YOU get busy and see to it that it happens. Instead of complaining, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

I appreciate your comments but there’s more to it than that. If I went and talked to my pastor and asked if it was OK to open the parish hall or teen center after Mass for coffee and snacks I suspect he would say “no.” And that’s OK because that can be changed.

What won’t change are the handful of people who then struggle to take control of such events (without any talent or real commitment) until they end up killing them because no one wants to be around these people. Maybe this is only at my parish?

You’re right though they too could be overcome with enough prayer and brute-form hard work. Sadly I would be more than willing to buy the coffee fixings and pick-up the doughnuts but never again will I waste my time with parish politics. That’s my excuse.

 

[ElToro]

Ah, I see. We have ours on weeknights. I suspect attendance would be poor on Sunday and that might be why it is during the week instead.

I think we too have a pretty diverse parish, but for the most part, **I don’t think Sunday is a day most folks have time to be at Church other than for Mass. ** We have a lot of meetings and activities going on on weeknights at Church and school (not really fellowship most of the time, though, but there is some of that, of course) and fellowship on Sunday just doesn’t happen much at our parish. Years ago, folks had time to stand around and talk. Now, we exchange pleasantries.

We only have donuts once a month or so. Actually, in thinking about it, it seems like it has been a few months since we’ve had a donut Sunday, but maybe I just missed it here and there. I served what I thought was the last time, but maybe I just missed. I’d been back home helping to take care of elderly parents and taking Mom to their Church while Dad was in rehab, so it could be I wasn’t around for it.

We do regularly have fish fries during Lent and there is a bit of fellowship then. I don’t know that we have much beyond that and the occasional donut Sunday, though.

Protestants seem too. Even in the “good old days” most Catholics rarely stuck around after Mass.

 

[ElToro]

I don’t know if any of you have been around Catholics – both clerics and laity when the wring their hands and ask the question “where is everyone?” Why doesn’t anyone come to Mass anymore?

Lack of fellowship is one reason.

 

[SwizzleStick]

Protestants seem too. Even in the “good old days” most Catholics rarely stuck around after Mass.

Okay. I wondered if this thread would eventually go there and again be about how much better Protestants do things than Catholics. From your other threads and posts, I get that you think that Protestants have much better music, much better preaching, much better services, much better fellowship, much better etc. This particular thread is focusing on fellowship.

From reading your other posts, you seem to really dislike the folks at your parish a lot and perhaps that is the crux of the problem. Maybe the answer for you is to investigate other Catholic parishes in your area (and abandon your practice of going to Protestant services in addition to going to Catholic Masses since that practice only seems to add to your discontent with your own parish) and perhaps you can find a Catholic parish more to your liking to attend?

I guess I agree that even in the “good old days” Catholics didn’t stick around all day after Mass. Sure, they had more time to talk and visit and hang around because the pace of life was less hectic back then, but then they went home to be with their families for Sunday dinner. Now, at our parish, we exchange pleasantries, say hello, talk a few minutes and sometimes stay for a donut and coffee and then go to be with our families either at home or elsewhere. We spend time at Church and school during the week. On Sunday, we go to Mass and then on to whatever the day holds.