Lack of Joy at Mass?

[Brendan_64]

In Catholic For Dummies and even the Catechism, it mentions how mass is obligated. I work Friday and Saturday nights every other week and If I were to become a Catholic, I don’t think I’d have enough energy to go to mass and if I did end up going, I’d be falling asleep or hating every minute of it, in other words, I would lack joy also.

If you work Friday and Saturday nights then how would that impact on going to a Sunday evening Mass? And then on every other weekend you would have no issues and could attend any Mass.

Christ willingly gave up his life for us on the cross and suffered scourging beforehand. I just can’t understand how anybody who truly believes in this would feel that it was just too much effort on their part to go to Mass on Sundays. Mass (for what is usually less than an hour) once a week on Sunday, that’s all we’re obligated. People can find time to go to the gym, or go to the pub, or go out for a meal, or play sport, or waste time on online message boards and social media, but they’re too busy to make the time for Mass on a Sunday?

 

[Blood_Angel]

Do you work Sundays also? If you do, you could go to early morning Mass, or Mass late in the evening.

I don’t work Sunday nights, no. I suppose I would find a parish that does the evening mass.

I know it may be hard, and I sometimes don’t want to go to Mass because I’m worn-out, but sometimes, we have to put up with just 40 minutes of it for Christ. You take take it as your Cross for Him. Believe me, it will all be worth it when you are nourished by the sacrament of the Eucharist.

That does makes sense!

 

[jilly4ski]

We have about 70 boys serve at our Sunday am Masses (OF) Masses. I was at the Sat 4:00pm Vigil Mass, and there were about 30 boys serving.

The EF Mass has about 15.

We do have a Sunday evening Mass, that one is the least attended (server wise), maybe only 6-8

Brendan, the High OF Latin Mass I sang at today had at least 20 altar boys. That is probably the most, but I know there are probably close to or more than 10 at all the other Masses, (I believe there are 4 on Sunday and one on Saturday.

But I wonder if the OP would find enough “Joy” at the High OF Latin Mass I attended today? The congregation does not sing at all except for the responses (et cum spiritu tuo, etc) and the Pater Noster. Instead the choir sang Mozart’s Mass in F-major, and the schola sang the Propers. The congregation is very quiet except for the crying babies. I did not stick around for the coffee and donuts (I had to get back to my husband and children) sponsored by the knights of Saint George. So I can’t comment on the fellowship, except that the Church has a K-12 school attached, so that helps with the number of people who know each other.

 

[jmr_1985]

After attending mass for about a year, I notice a lack of joy. Lot’s of folks not singing, and when we say “Thanks be to God” it’s in a tone I wouldn’t use to thank someone for a birthday gift.

When mass is done it’s like burnout time getting out of there - not much fellowship afterwards. Most folks are gone before the last song is done.

Is it just me?

I heard David Anders give a very good answer to this question. In Protestantism, salvation generally revolves around an intellectual faith in Our Lord. So, there is a huge emphasis on Bible Studies and other faith building activities. In Catholicism, Catholics come to the Parish to receive the sacraments. They come to Mass to receive Our Lord in the Eucharist. So, the view of why they are at Sunday Mass is really very different. This tends to confuse Protestants coming into the Church.

That being said, leaving early is something that many Priest cannot stand. From my experience, if the parish Priest will make it known that he is displeased about it, it starts to cut down on those leaving early.

After getting into RCIA, I’ve started meeting people and making friends. It’s taken longer that being a Protestant, but I also do appreciate not being jammed by the welcoming committee upon arrival for recruitment activities. I really liked that I could sit at Mass anonymously and pray while I discerned.

All that to say, why not check out a few other local Parishes and see what you think?

 

[Brendan]

Pardon me while I pick my jaw up off the floor. :bigyikes:

Here is a video from a few months ago

sdrv.ms/KSzdSN

 

[Brendan]

I don’t work Sunday nights, no. I suppose I would find a parish that does the evening mass.!

Here in Detroit, every Vicariate (Deanery) is required to have at least one Sunday pm Mass. Our parish is one of two in our Vicariate which does.

Our parish is very near a major hospital, and the 8:30pm Sunday Mass is regularly attended by hospital workers who work the late afternoon or night shifts.

So check with your diocese, hopefully, they will have a similar policy, and if not, check out parishes that are near hospitals or third shift manufacturing plants.

 

[Brendan]

But I wonder if the OP would find enough “Joy” at the High OF Latin Mass I attended today? The congregation does not sing at all except for the responses (et cum spiritu tuo, etc) and the Pater Noster. Instead the choir sang Mozart’s Mass in F-major, and the schola sang the Propers.

I know what you are saying. There have been a LOT of times in my life where I have experienced great joy, but very few of those have involved me breaking out in song.

Mostly, it is interior joy, like being in a quiet, majestic landscape, where any words would never suffice.

I feel that as well at Mass.

 

[Sarabande]

I would agree with this. You cannot know others reasons for not singing, doing the responses in a low tone, and leaving directly after Mass.

I find in general, New Englanders are more sober in their Mass participation. Everything is done in a low tone, and with slow dignity. This can make for a very nice Mass, of course, when the parish is trying to be hip, cool, and “with it” it can make for a very sad looking Mass. But I cannot fault them for the Church culture the grew up in, or prefer.

Midwesterners tend to be more “charismatic” and their Church culture often reflects that. I think it comes from the more protestant culture in the area.

Lots of people go out for a family brunch right after Mass, or others have to rush out and start their Sunday dinner. Others have to rush out and can’t stay long for fellowship because of their children.

Illness, poor sing voice, or poor music selection, might all be reasons people don’t sing.

I agree with this and KrazyCat as well as many of the other responses. People’s cultures will also have them act differently, such as what Jilly4ski described. I’m half Filipina, so whenever I’ve attended my relatives’ Filipino parish, they tend to have more of an outward participation at mass as well as “fellowship” afterwards. You can see what they are experiencing internally. Filipinos tend to love to sing as well, since it is part of our culture, so you will experience more people singing at the masses. I can’t go to a Filipino family party without being part of Karaoke and dancing, for instance.

I think it is important to not try to guess what is going on in people’s minds and hearts while we are mass. Even though a part of my culture is Filipina and I enjoy that aspect of my culture, I am naturally an introvert and the way I usually express pure joy is not what some people would expect. My joy is often internal. I might have a little smile, as my face naturally smiles, but other than that, I think some people may assume that I lack joy. I love being at mass, even when I’m stressed out with my children or worried about a difficult piece of music I’m singing with a choir. Just because my face isn’t “beaming” or I’m not jumping up and down with joy doesn’t mean that I’m not experiencing joy. For me, acting like that isn’t who I am and would be phony if I did that at mass. I’m much more joyfully internal when in church. I will sing, though, unless I really just need to listen to the music and focus on it in that way… or if I’m sick.

The nice thing about all of the parishes I regularly sing at is that most people stay until the last verse of the hymn. Some masses are better sung and have more “outward” participation, but I know that for even the many of the people I know who attend the more “inward” masses, they do like being there.

 

[Sarabande]

Brendan, the High OF Latin Mass I sang at today had at least 20 altar boys. That is probably the most, but I know there are probably close to or more than 10 at all the other Masses, (I believe there are 4 on Sunday and one on Saturday.

But I wonder if the OP would find enough “Joy” at the High OF Latin Mass I attended today? The congregation does not sing at all except for the responses (et cum spiritu tuo, etc) and the Pater Noster. Instead the choir sang Mozart’s Mass in F-major, and the schola sang the Propers. The congregation is very quiet except for the crying babies. I did not stick around for the coffee and donuts (I had to get back to my husband and children) sponsored by the knights of Saint George. So I can’t comment on the fellowship, except that the Church has a K-12 school attached, so that helps with the number of people who know each other.

I think if the OP changes how he/she understands how joy can be expressed in various ways, he/she might be able to find it there.

BTW - So happy that you have been a part of that parish! Mass in F-major!!! Yay! I’m like you, especially if my husband and kids couldn’t make it to mass. I’m rushing out the door so that I can get back in time for my husband to attend mass in our nearby parish.

 

[Sarabande]

I know what you are saying. There have been a LOT of times in my life where I have experienced great joy, but very few of those have involved me breaking out in song.

Mostly, it is interior joy, like being in a quiet, majestic landscape, where any words would never suffice.

I feel that as well at Mass.

So true!

 

[jilly4ski]

I think if the OP changes how he/she understands how joy can be expressed in various ways, he/she might be able to find it there.

BTW - So happy that you have been a part of that parish! Mass in F-major!!! Yay! I’m like you, especially if my husband and kids couldn’t make it to mass. I’m rushing out the door so that I can get back in time for my husband to attend mass in our nearby parish.

Yes, we sing a new master work every Sunday. Next Sunday is Gounod’s Saint Cecilia Mass, I am so excited!!! I am always super impressed with the soloists. They come in and sing a the Mass for that day always wonderfully. The orchestra too, they show up and the music is just on their stand and they play it. (Of course most of the musicians and soloists have been doing these pieces for several years, it always just poor me who has only sang the piece of music maybe twice before LOL). We all showed up for a funeral on Saturday and sang Mozart’s Requiem for the funeral of the deacon at the parish, with no rehearsal since All souls day.

The parish that we belong to, almost every one stays beyond the final hymn and everyone kneels and prays an Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be for those who have died and those who will die today. (The founding pastor started this tradition). But yes, then most people leave, but it is often, after 11am, and people have to get home and stat lunch I am sure.

 

[pianistclare]

From what I’ve read in this thread…orchestras, fine soloists, magnificent organs, staying and praying together as church after Mass…

y’all from up north are blessed.
I feel like my parish is workin with a Dixie cup and a string.



I’ll say it again, If you have great liturgy…thank your pastor!

 

[Sarabande]

From what I’ve read in this thread…orchestras, fine soloists, magnificent organs, staying and praying together as church after Mass…

y’all from up north are blessed.
I feel like my parish is workin with a Dixie cup and a string.



I’ll say it again, If you have great liturgy…thank your pastor!

Yes, definitely. Without the support and leadership of the pastor, none of this can really be accomplished. We should also thank our parishioners. I know that without them and their financial support the churches where I am now would not have the kind of music liturgy that we can provide.

And don’t knock yourself, pianistclare. A good pianist by himself/herself can make a huge difference in the music liturgy.

 

[Kount_C]

After attending mass for about a year, I notice a lack of joy. Lot’s of folks not singing, and when we say “Thanks be to God” it’s in a tone I wouldn’t use to thank someone for a birthday gift.

When mass is done it’s like burnout time getting out of there - not much fellowship afterwards. Most folks are gone before the last song is done.

Is it just me?

It is becuase people need more then a 1 hour mass celibration. There is no fellowship ; I for one; am nearly 35 years old, and I hate going to mass and being the only person who is not retired there. I would much rather go somewhere where I can be wtih people in my own age range to celibrate the mass. But the church does not provide this enviroment.

Why are there not parrishes in the dioces specifically set aside for younger adults to discerne vocations, ie… marriage, preisthood, courtship. ect…

People will have joy in mass, when they have a sense of fellowship.

Cheers!

 

[jilly4ski]

From what I’ve read in this thread…orchestras, fine soloists, magnificent organs, staying and praying together as church after Mass…

y’all from up north are blessed.
I feel like my parish is workin with a Dixie cup and a string.



I’ll say it again, If you have great liturgy…thank your pastor!

Yes, these parishes are few and far between. The parish to which I belong has a mediocre organist and a music “director” who uses Mass as her substandard choir’s concert. Our last pastor however, introduced/reintroduced some dignity and beauty into our weekly Sunday Mass. He moved the tabernacle to the center of the Church (a project the pastor before him had started and a parishioner had financed) added some candles, purchased some nicer vestments than those single color polyester ones that seemed so popular a few decades ago, and changed the altar servers wear (boys now year a cassock and surplice, and when girls serve, they wear an alb and scapular, like religious). But mostly up here in the midwest, parishes are very suburban and often try to be “charismatic.” Thus breaking out guitars and drum set, singing folk or pop Christian songs etc.

 

[Della]

It is becuase people need more then a 1 hour mass celibration. There is no fellowship ; I for one; am nearly 35 years old, and I hate going to mass and being the only person who is not retired there. I would much rather go somewhere where I can be wtih people in my own age range to celibrate the mass. But the church does not provide this enviroment.
Why are there not parrishes in the dioces specifically set aside for younger adults to discerne vocations, ie… marriage, preisthood, courtship. ect…

People will have joy in mass, when they have a sense of fellowship.

Cheers!

Parishes are usually regional (wrong word, but the right one is escaping me at the moment) not special ones. And usually special parishes have been reserved for ethnic groups, orders, or for the EF Mass. You might want to try going to a monastic Mass instead of your local parish. You’d have to get enough people together who also want a parish set aside for a particular age group and petition the bishop for it, if you really think that would make any difference.

I don’t believe it would because seeing those who have been faithful when so many young people have let themselves be more enchanted by the world than by Christ is an inspiration to me, rather than a negative. Try talking to those good people sometime instead of simply writing them off. Any man who wants to be a parish priest who has no time for those who don’t suit him will be an utter failure in any parish no matter if it’s a regional or special parish.

 

[MorEphrem]

Sentimentality is neither necessary nor sufficient, as a Dominican friend of mine put it. The pursuit of the objective truth in needing to worship God properly should not be contingent upon emotional reaction. Sometimes it’s hard to seen externally joyous after attending the same church for 40 years, but the important thing is that they still come to receive the sacraments and pray in the unity of the Church.

While it would be optimal if everyone sang at church, and sometimes it bothers me, we shouldn’t let such things disturb our worship.

@Kount C, mass should be the assembly of all ages. I think your observation is indicative of the issue that perhaps the Church has failed to retain a proper spread of the ages over the past few decades.

 

[Sarabande]

Parishes are usually regional (wrong word, but the right one is escaping me at the moment) not special ones. And usually special parishes have been reserved for ethnic groups, orders, or for the EF Mass. You might want to try going to a monastic Mass instead of your local parish. You’d have to get enough people together who also want a parish set aside for a particular age group and petition the bishop for it, if you really think that would make any difference.

I don’t believe it would because seeing those who have been faithful when so many young people have let themselves be more enchanted by the world than by Christ is an inspiration to me, rather than a negative. Try talking to those good people sometime instead of simply writing them off. Any man who wants to be a parish priest who has no time for those who don’t suit him will be an utter failure in any parish no matter if it’s a regional or special parish.

Right. Agree with above. Have you also considered attending mass in a parish which is close to local colleges or where young professionals live? Many of the parishes in the city where I normally work has a good number of young adults attending. I’m around your age group. My husband has always told me that if he were single and wanted to be attending a parish with more people our age, he’d drive the extra 30 minutes to an hour every week to attend the masses in the city.

I do agree, though, that it seems singles, especially those out of college through to about 40 or so, can feel lost and left out of fellowship at their local parishes. Some parishes are really good for young people with families, teens, children, college students, and seniors, but singles can feel overlooked.

 

[zaffiroborant]

It is becuase people need more then a 1 hour mass celibration. There is no fellowship ; I for one; am nearly 35 years old, and I hate going to mass and being the only person who is not retired there. I would much rather go somewhere where I can be wtih people in my own age range to celibrate the mass. But the church does not provide this enviroment.
Why are there not parrishes in the dioces specifically set aside for younger adults to discerne vocations, ie… marriage, preisthood, courtship. ect…

People will have joy in mass, when they have a sense of fellowship.

Cheers!

I’ve never understood the need to attend Mass with people of the same demographic, IMO Mass is not social hour or a place to hang out with your friends. I’ve also never attended a church where the people didn’t run the gamut from young adult, through families with kids of all ages, to retirees, maybe it’s a small town/suburban thing? At my current parish there is informal socializing in the narthex between every Mass, there is coffee, juice and donuts available and people stay after Mass or come early and visit.