Lack of young Catholics

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My parents hardly ever attend Mass and I felt lonely sitting all by myself. So, I joined the choir. Now I have a reserved seat! (Especially useful at midnight Mass and on Easter!)
 
I live in Philadelphia; when i graduated college, i tried to connect with my church’s youth group aimed at catholics in their 20’s and 30s. it so happened after mass they go to the local bar and socialize… disaster. i felt EXTREMELY unwelcomed, they were clique- ish and the priest never even came over and introduced himself even though we were two seats apart. i was ignored most of the time and in the end, a girl asked for my email to connect me to more events… never heard a word.

I know it’s not like this everywhere but at that moment i felt so much sorrow because I know people are called to protestant churches bc of the overwhelming sense of community they get when they go there. How many others went to this very church searching for God and felt isolated and rejected? I sincerely hope we are moving towards orthodoxy but I also hope we increase our sense of community.

A note on music: this church also has a friar who does the music with a guitar and syncopated songs that are hard to follow and an elton john-like voice. it sounds so… empty. i know he is well intentioned and wants to praise God but i think i would pass out if i heard a mass that was vocals ONLY and no more than a few notes (like a chant). feeling Him in music rather than drowning him out? what a crazy idea.
 
In my parish the youth seem to break with religion around the age of fifteen. There are some families who participate for the children’s sake. Most of the congregation looks like a geriatric ward.
 
looooopes said:
I live in Philadelphia; when i graduated college, i tried to connect with my church’s youth group aimed at catholics in their 20’s and 30s. it so happened after mass they go to the local bar and socialize… disaster. i felt EXTREMELY unwelcomed, they were clique- ish and the priest never even came over and introduced himself even though we were two seats apart. i was ignored most of the time and in the end, a girl asked for my email to connect me to more events… never heard a word.

I know it’s not like this everywhere but at that moment i felt so much sorrow because I know people are called to protestant churches bc of the overwhelming sense of community they get when they go there. How many others went to this very church searching for God and felt isolated and rejected? I sincerely hope we are moving towards orthodoxy but I also hope we increase our sense of community.

A note on music: this church also has a friar who does the music with a guitar and syncopated songs that are hard to follow and an elton john-like voice. it sounds so… empty. i know he is well intentioned and wants to praise God but i think i would pass out if i heard a mass that was vocals ONLY and no more than a few notes (like a chant). feeling Him in music rather than drowning him out? what a crazy idea.
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When I started attending the parish in which I later entered RCIA at, it was quite a lonely event, especially visiting the parish hall for coffee and donuts. Of course now I have become quite familiar with a good amount of the parishioners and clergymen, yet I rarely stop by anymore. In the end, I do understand your perspective regarding the issue of community.
 
TrueLight said:
I can’t seem to find anyone with children at all. I would love to meet some women with kids in the pre-teen to teen range.

Although I hang out with people of all ages, it would be good to make some Catholic women friends my age, who can hang out sometimes.
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I’d like to meet more women around my age (51) who are at the same place in life DH and I are. We have a 26 y/o daughter who no longer lives at home, but I keep meeting women who still have kids at home or older grandmothers.
 
The lack of the 18-34 year old demographic is pretty common. My wife and I didn’t come back to the Church until our early 30s.
 
for this reason i parsh hop- pretty much every sunday i check out a new parish in my area. i joined a young adult group for a couple weeks last year- singles for christ but it wasn’t my cup of tea. the people were completely amazing, don’t get me wrong but that was not the right group for me. so i’m still searching for a group of young catholics.

i’m also on the search for a good confessor. i go to different parish searching for a good confessor. the best confessors i’ve had have been at the religious education congress in anahiem.
 
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=8845304#post8845304

You may just have to start reaching out to anyone and everyone you come across and hope you find some good friends who are as interested in their faith as you are. I’ve struggled with this for over a year now but have recently begun to develop a few solid friendships with a handful of peers.

I do a lot of lay ministry with people of all ages and I run into so many 20’-30’s Catholics that truly desire an outlet to enhance their faith. Some think I have a great gift for ministry within this demographic and am a natural leader, yada yada yada. I find myself having to challenge others quite often to back up their sentiments with action as it always seems like there’s a whole lot of talk but not enough follow through.
 
Kenny_Kamel said:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=8845304#post8845304

You may just have to start reaching out to anyone and everyone you come across and hope you find some good friends who are as interested in their faith as you are. I’ve struggled with this for over a year now but have recently begun to develop a few solid friendships with a handful of peers.

I do a lot of lay ministry with people of all ages and I run into so many 20’-30’s Catholics that truly desire an outlet to enhance their faith. Some think I have a great gift for ministry within this demographic and am a natural leader, yada yada yada. I find myself having to challenge others quite often to back up their sentiments with action as it always seems like there’s a whole lot of talk but not enough follow through.
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i’m involved in my parish. i teach religious ed to 6th graders and i love it. i go to devotions- divine mercy, 1st friday, adoration, 1st saturday (when i can), theology on tap, the religious ed congresses, i don’t want to start a group because i don’t have time for that but at the same time most of these young adult groups aren’t convenient.

i’m not a complaining, just saying, as a young adult trying to actively pracitice my faith i feel all alone since my family doesn’t practice… sometimes i just end up doing devotions, going to confession and not going to mass because i don’t want to be all by myself in the pew. i know people are going to harp on me about not being alone at mass blah blah blah but this is a valid feeling i have and i’m suspecting others feel this way too.
 
danizaga said:
i’m involved in my parish. i teach religious ed to 6th graders and i love it. i go to devotions- divine mercy, 1st friday, adoration, 1st saturday (when i can), theology on tap, the religious ed congresses, i don’t want to start a group because i don’t have time for that but at the same time most of these young adult groups aren’t convenient.

i’m not a complaining, just saying, as a young adult trying to actively pracitice my faith i feel all alone since my family doesn’t practice… sometimes i just end up doing devotions, going to confession and not going to mass because i don’t want to be all by myself in the pew. i know people are going to harp on me about not being alone at mass blah blah blah but this is a valid feeling i have and i’m suspecting others feel this way too.
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That statement alone tells me that we’re incredibly similar in our situations, I practice my faith alone almost exclusively. I know many people who I share my time with but, for example, I have had the hardest time getting anyone to do something as simple as praying the rosary with me. I go to Mass seven days a week and sit by myself at least 95% of the time, the people at Mass know me or at least are familiar with me (having seen me there and having had a few smalltalk conversations), and usually after Mass I’ll talk with my closest friends which leads to doing something.

That all being said, I don’t expect to have anyone to actively practice my faith with until I find the person I am to marry. That is because I would have a hard time marrying anyone who would not be open to practicing their faith in a similar manner, I’ve come across a few people like that but it just hasn’t worked out thus far. Don’t give up hope and realize that being alone in your faith is a gift from our Lord at this time in your life. So much I could say but suffice it all and defer to our Lord’s plan in forming us for his purpose to be served in the future.
 
At my church i do see it as well depending on the mass and which priest is giving the mass… unfortunately to say there arent many youths in mass… however, most parishes have youth groups and young adult bible classes. I live in Anaheim, CA and i attend a youth group in Santa Ana, CA its called Search for Christ and its a group of young people 18-39yrs old and they learn and share about their life experiences, put on retreats, organize payer circles and so forth… they have also made trips to orphanages, and homeless shelters… look up your diocese online and look for events in your area, you may just find the group that helps you grow. 👍
 
danizaga said:
i’m involved in my parish. i teach religious ed to 6th graders and i love it. i go to devotions- divine mercy, 1st friday, adoration, 1st saturday (when i can), theology on tap, the religious ed congresses, i don’t want to start a group because i don’t have time for that but at the same time most of these young adult groups aren’t convenient.

i’m not a complaining, just saying, as a young adult trying to actively pracitice my faith i feel all alone since my family doesn’t practice… sometimes i just end up doing devotions, going to confession and not going to mass because i don’t want to be all by myself in the pew. i know people are going to harp on me about not being alone at mass blah blah blah but this is a valid feeling i have and i’m suspecting others feel this way too.
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Regardless of how you feel, you still have to go to Mass on Sunday. Doing the rest is pretty pointless, especially going to Confession if you’re not willing to amend your life. It’s a mortal sin to not go to Mass on Sundays.

There’s plenty of single people (much much muuuuch older than me) who go to Mass alone. It’s one of those things you have to put yourself aside and just do. Have you thought about joining non-singles groups? You never know. Someone might be able to hook you up with their son/daughter, who might know people as well.

I find the people my age at my parish aren’t really like me either. On the traditional side, the girls my age are all into kids and looking after people’s kids and playing with them (no thank-you), and would scorn in horror if I told them I work with criminals charged with horrendous crimes. Traditionally, women aren’t supposed to do that. (Even many of the older men and women don’t approve. Whatever :rolleyes:.).

On the non-traditional side, they’re all into doing “peaceful protest” type activities for pro-life (something I can’t have any part in due to a) the police here have the discretion of a toddler, so b) I run the high risk of police involvement on the criminal level that would put my much-needed security clearance at risk, even if I “just got a warning” it still shows up in my security clearance) and saving the environment. YAWN

I spend my day doing my own corporal and spiritual works of mercy (or as they call it “social justice” :rolleyes:). Don’t church people do normal social things like go bowling?
 
Jessup said:
I don’t know what you are referring to, unless you mean the worship with contemporary songs? what is a Life Teen Mass? and what is a EF high mass? help me out here LOL
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With pleasure/1

Life Teen Mass
youtu.be/6nRKB6uIwxc
:eek:

youtu.be/Nk6k022pfSk
:eek: The problem with people playing the tambourine is that they don’t know how to play one properly. It’s not something you simply hit.

EF High Mass
youtu.be/M0u_YAmPI4w

The EF Mass (Extraordinary Form of Mass) is a little more on the peaceful side and more conducive to prayer, I find.
 
Deo_Gratias42 said:
With pleasure/1

Life Teen Mass
youtu.be/6nRKB6uIwxc
:eek:

youtu.be/Nk6k022pfSk
:eek: The problem with people playing the tambourine is that they don’t know how to play one properly. It’s not something you simply hit.

EF High Mass
youtu.be/M0u_YAmPI4w

The EF Mass (Extraordinary Form of Mass) is a little more on the peaceful side and more conducive to prayer, I find.
Click to expand...
I’ll have to look at the Life Teen Mass later, never watched one online nor attended one.

I am looking forward to nice weather so I can start traveling 30+ miles one way to attend the EF Mass. I love the reverence and respect people show regardless if its a High or Low Mass.
 
lmpower said:
In my parish the youth seem to break with religion around the age of fifteen. There are some families who participate for the children’s sake. Most of the congregation looks like a geriatric ward.
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I see that a lot too…either that, or it’s all charismatic renewal type stuff, or spirit of vatican II type stuff (again, note I said “spirit of” not Vatican II itself). It’s lonely at times. And I always wonder what will be left when the older generations pass away…lots of empty pews.
That’s why it’s so important that the younger generations participate in the rebuilding of the Church. It seems that the 20th century, it took a tremendous amount of damage. Let’s help her back to her feet!👍
 
i know i should be going to mass on sundays, i’m breaking the commandments and it’s a mortal sin. i’m making the active choice not to and i expect most young adults are making the same choice. so please don’t go on about this.

there is a part of the mass during the eucharistic prayer that i feel the most connected to God, i feel it when i’m praying in adoration as well. it’s a natural feeling i don’t know how to describe it but that’s when i know God loves me and the whole world. it doesn’t matter if i’m going to a latin mass, spanish mass, charismatic mass, whatever it’s the liturgy, i feel God’s love and mercy.

all i want is someone to go to mass with me to share this experience with me. doesn’t matter if they’re my family, a friend or whatever. i’d bring my dog with me if i could but i can’t. i want someone to share this with but i don’t have that.

i don’t feel part of the bigger parish community when i go to mass espeically if it’s a youth and young adult mass. omg i feel even more isolated me with my huge neck tattoo and being all punk rock. i feel contacted to the ladies that teach religious education with me and the ones from the divine mercy cantale that i sometimes attend. i am so thankful for them because they have taught me so much. i always look out for them at mass because it makes me feel like i belong in my parish community.

i can totally understand why people leave the church because they are looking for community and because the parish is very clique driven. i admit because i’m part of the clique too even though i had to work my way in for years and sometimes i still don’t feel like i belong because i get busy and caught up with other aspects of my life.
 
marybell82 said:
At my church i do see it as well depending on the mass and which priest is giving the mass… unfortunately to say there arent many youths in mass… however, most parishes have youth groups and young adult bible classes. I live in Anaheim, CA and i attend a youth group in Santa Ana, CA its called Search for Christ and its a group of young people 18-39yrs old and they learn and share about their life experiences, put on retreats, organize payer circles and so forth… they have also made trips to orphanages, and homeless shelters… look up your diocese online and look for events in your area, you may just find the group that helps you grow. 👍
Click to expand...
thanks for the tip i’ll check it out. i’m over in the san gabriel valley. have you ever been to the religious education congress in anaheim? it’s so amazing. i’ve been going for the past 3 years.
 
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