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Tenebrae
Guest
I remember hearing or reading somewhere that there are changes which take place in a man’s brain as he ages, causing him to get grumpier as he gets on in years. Do you think it’s true?
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Prague
Guest
Well, my hubby just turned 78, and he is still a reall sweetie. Does a great job of spoiling me.
:hug1: Love my sweetie…
:hug1: Love my sweetie…
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allhers
Guest
Mine does some days, seems to take his frustrations out on me a bit at times if something doesn’t work right, like the lawnmower or the car, etc…I don’t really think he thinks that I personally am the cause of things not working right, its just that he will, in a very puzzled and angry sounding voice say something like, Why? Why doesn’t it work right? What could it be? (I think its more that he’s just trying to figure something out and if I happen to be around he just says it out loud.)
I just remind him to pray in all things and walk away praying.
Sometimes I look things up for him on the internet (he hates computers), or advise him to call one of our brothers who are good with things like that.I saw this little sign once with a teddy bear on it that said:
Sometimes I wake up grumpy…and sometimes I let him sleep.
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Catholic90
Guest
Yes, definitely. He is 45, struggles with depression and his poor job situation in this economy, and is definitely crankier than when I married him.
He does not mean to, but he takes out his anger and frustration via yelling when he is home. He recognizes that his anger at his job situation is not our fault and then feels guilty about yelling and the kids and me, so he leaves and spends less time at home. It is a vicious circle.
He does not mean to, but he takes out his anger and frustration via yelling when he is home. He recognizes that his anger at his job situation is not our fault and then feels guilty about yelling and the kids and me, so he leaves and spends less time at home. It is a vicious circle.
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mrpathetic
Guest
I resemble that remark
… Seriously, I could be Catholic90’s husband, except that I am a couple years younger…Why am I so cranky and unpleasant all the time? Why do I resemble Jack Lemon’s character in the movie “Grumpy Old Men?”
There are a multitude of reasons, and I am sure the reasons are different for many men. But I can clearly, unequivocably state the primary reason for me: No sex.
My wife and I have not had relations for 16 years. None, zero, nada. I am sure I would be more cheerful and hospitable, if I had sex sometime over the past decade and a half.
I would venture a guess that this is the cause for at least a third of the “grumpy old men.” Rabbi Schmuley Boteach recently published a book, in which he stated that a third of marriages were completely sexless. I supect that 100% of the men in those marriages are “grumpy.”
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VAC
Guest
Nope, he’s 49 and still has the patience of a saint. I have the monopoly on mood swings.
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Arlene
Guest
I must have a man’s brain then. Because I am definately getting grumpier as I get older.
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whatevergirl
Guest
I would imagine your wife isn’t happy about it either?I resemble that remark
Why am I so cranky and unpleasant all the time? Why do I resemble Jack Lemon’s character in the movie “Grumpy Old Men?”
There are a multitude of reasons, and I am sure the reasons are different for many men. But I can clearly, unequivocably state the primary reason for me: No sex.
My wife and I have not had relations for 16 years. None, zero, nada. I am sure I would be more cheerful and hospitable, if I had sex sometime over the past decade and a half.
I would venture a guess that this is the cause for at least a third of the “grumpy old men.” Rabbi Schmuley Boteach recently published a book, in which he stated that a third of marriages were completely sexless. I supect that 100% of the men in those marriages are “grumpy.”
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Sierrah
Guest
Mary_Gail_36
New member
That really makes me happy to see! God bless you!Well, my hubby just turned 78, and he is still a reall sweetie. Does a great job of spoiling me.
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Cajun_Girl
Guest
I can’t say. . .Mine was already “old” when I married him (well, 10 years older than me, anyway), and he was already grouchy!
Although, as he is quick to point out, he’s grouchy in a loveable way.
Although, as he is quick to point out, he’s grouchy in a loveable way.
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Cat
Guest
I think that a lot of men (and women, too) begin to realize as they get older that they won’t achieve all those goals and dreams that they had when they were young.
E.g., hiking across the U.S., travelling around the world, inventing something, writing the Great American Novel, getting discovered in a restaurant by a Hollywood producer, becoming a triathlete, running a marathon, owning a Lamborghini, being debt-free, etc. etc.
Some of the physical goals are thwarted by poor health, injuries, or physical conditions that eliminate options. E.g., a person with osteoarthritis of the knees will never run a marathon. (Frankly, I’ll be happy if I am able to keep walking.)
Some of the work and money goals are thwarted by lack of talent, lack of opportunity (getting tied down by family responsibilities), or by the traitorous acts of co-workers and so-called friends.
It’s really hard to get older and realize that all these things will never happen. That’s why a story like Susan Boyle’s is so appealing to many of us–it reminds us to not give up. But honest, folks, the time comes when you really have to give up to remain mentally and emotionally healthy.
You also become starkly aware as you get older of the reality of death and the grave and eternity. Just today, my supervisor, a 53-year old thin, fit woman, had a heart attack in the parking lot of our workplace (thankfully it’s a hospital!). She’s lying upstairs now facing surgery. OMG!
She’s only a year older than me!
So give grumpy old people a break.
E.g., hiking across the U.S., travelling around the world, inventing something, writing the Great American Novel, getting discovered in a restaurant by a Hollywood producer, becoming a triathlete, running a marathon, owning a Lamborghini, being debt-free, etc. etc.
Some of the physical goals are thwarted by poor health, injuries, or physical conditions that eliminate options. E.g., a person with osteoarthritis of the knees will never run a marathon. (Frankly, I’ll be happy if I am able to keep walking.)
Some of the work and money goals are thwarted by lack of talent, lack of opportunity (getting tied down by family responsibilities), or by the traitorous acts of co-workers and so-called friends.
It’s really hard to get older and realize that all these things will never happen. That’s why a story like Susan Boyle’s is so appealing to many of us–it reminds us to not give up. But honest, folks, the time comes when you really have to give up to remain mentally and emotionally healthy.
You also become starkly aware as you get older of the reality of death and the grave and eternity. Just today, my supervisor, a 53-year old thin, fit woman, had a heart attack in the parking lot of our workplace (thankfully it’s a hospital!). She’s lying upstairs now facing surgery. OMG!
She’s only a year older than me!So give grumpy old people a break.
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mrpathetic
Guest
I don’t know; she seems awfully contented. She never has to have sex with me, but I continue to pay for mortgage and most of the other bills. For a middle-aged woman, that has to be the best possible scenario. I couldn’t imagine a better circumstance for her.I would imagine your wife isn’t happy about it either?
Then again,I guess the absolute, very-best scenario for her, would be for me to die. Then she would get all the life insurance money, and she wouldn’t have to put up with my grumpiness anymore. And all the bills would be paid for.
(Well, there would be at least one additional bill - the funeral - but there are ways to economize on that. You can always buy a wooden casket instead of metal, use plastic flowers instead of real ones, etc.)
Yes, I am being cynical. Sorry, this question popped a raw nerve in me.
Maybe I need to change me screen name to “PaycheckWithLegs”.
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whatevergirl
Guest
*Your wife hurts you, because she is very unhappy. People who are ‘contented’ don’t hurt others. Your wife has been treating you poorly for a while. People who treat others poorly, are not happy within themselves. I don’t imagine she is happy living a sexless marriage, either…you both sound like somewhere along the lines, you both gave up on trying to work on your marriage, and you both just exist together. You, to not make waves from what you have posted here, she, because she doesn’t care, or whatever other reason. But, either way, I doubt she is happy.
Also–how about priests and nuns who go without sex for a lifetime? Perhaps, it could be that they willingly accept celibacy as part of their vocation–marriage typically isn’t assumed to cause one to lead a sexless life. But, while they have their good and bad days, most priests and nuns I have met, obviously leading celibate lives, are shining with joy. If you feel that you have no other options, but to remain celibate, mr p…then try to live your life in joy, despite the fact that you have not had sex in many years. To be honest, every person has crosses. I carry crosses, my parents died when I was a kid. There have been times when I have been exceedinly grouchy and sad. But, I don’t want that to define me. Don’t let having a sexless marriage define you – anymore. While it’s unfortunate, you carry a cross like many of us, albeit a different one. We all must try to find joy in our everyday lives, despite our crosses.
Sorry, OP, didn’t mean to go offtopic. And I’m sorry that you have experienced what you have, mr p. *
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MarieVeronica
Guest
Since I’m unmarried… I can’t comment on the question. But I had an observation. I have noticed that as I myself get older (I turned 50 this year)… I’ve gotten a bit “crankier” :blushing: I’m trying to work on it, though. Really.
So… maybe it’s something that goes with getting older, in general? Just a thought.
God bless.
So… maybe it’s something that goes with getting older, in general? Just a thought.
God bless.
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tampagrl
Guest
Considering my hubby’s had to deal w/ all my crazy for the last 10yrs, I’d say, yes, he’s gotten a tad more grumpy. Poor man.
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katy
Guest
Yes, unfortunately. Very much so.
It seems to go with the men in his family. I don’t know why, maybe they think that is the way one is supposed to be.
It seems to go with the men in his family. I don’t know why, maybe they think that is the way one is supposed to be.
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Prague
Guest
Thank you Mary Gail. I need all of the blessings I can get, and the same goes to you.
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LilyM
Guest
I’m in my mid-30s and get the grumps plenty - doesn’t bode well for the future! I’m single, so can’t comment on my own partners.
With my parents, if anything, my mother’s getting grumpier as she gets older whereas Dad is mellowing out. Of course she’s had a lot more health problems, which can’t help. And perhaps is finding semi-retirement a little boring, whereas he really enjoys pottering round his farm and tending to his critters and fruit trees.
My older sisters (all bar one of 'em) seem to be mellowing as they get older, likewise their husbands. Which is nice to see.
I’m single, so can’t comment on my own partners.With my parents, if anything, my mother’s getting grumpier as she gets older whereas Dad is mellowing out. Of course she’s had a lot more health problems, which can’t help. And perhaps is finding semi-retirement a little boring, whereas he really enjoys pottering round his farm and tending to his critters and fruit trees.
My older sisters (all bar one of 'em) seem to be mellowing as they get older, likewise their husbands. Which is nice to see.
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wcknight
Guest
According to my wife, YES, but according to me, I don’t think so.
My brother in law is about 20 years older than me, and he has really mellowed out compared to what he used to be.
I’m a fairly laid back guy to begin with. Nothing upsets me very much. Some folks say they have never seen me upset or angry.
My wife disagrees with this. She would tell you, I’m grumpy every day although out in public I’m very quiet and rarely say anything at all. Somewhere in the middle, lies the truth.
My brother in law is about 20 years older than me, and he has really mellowed out compared to what he used to be.
I’m a fairly laid back guy to begin with. Nothing upsets me very much. Some folks say they have never seen me upset or angry.
My wife disagrees with this. She would tell you, I’m grumpy every day although out in public I’m very quiet and rarely say anything at all. Somewhere in the middle, lies the truth.
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