Late for Mass a sin?

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My family and I usually attend Mass every Sunday at 5 pm. Today, however, we came to Mass really late (we walked in when the priest was finishing up the homily). The reason why we were late was b/c we went to the cemetery to drop off some flowers at my grandmother’s grave. Apparently, my father thought it would get dark soon (which is ridiculous b/c it’s daylight savings times) so he took us to the cemetery first. Even if it would get dark soon, it’s not like we should put visiting my grandma’s grave before attending Mass.

We arrived at the church about half an hour late, so I tried to stay in the car b/c I was so upset. But my parents forced me to go. So I felt really bad about coming to Mass so late that I did not go up for communion b/c I felt it would be wrong to do so. But my mother still went up for communion and she even tried to get me to go too, but I refused. So after the Mass, my parents were saying things like it doesn’t matter if you’re late for Mass, it’s not like it’s a class or something and it doesn’t matter as long as you don’t sin, but I thought that not coming to Mass or coming really late is a sin b/c of the commandment to keep the sabbath day holy. So is it a sin to come to Mass late, and should I confess b/c I came to Mass late? Would it have been wrong for me to receive communion, or would it have been ok?
 
WEll…I could be wrong…but this is my opinion…since you were with your family who was responsible for you arriving to Mass on time, and you truly wanted to be there…extraordinary circumstances prevented you from doing so…then therefore you did not commit mortal sin. I do believe off the info you gave that your parents did commit mortal sin by not arriving on time (because they made the choice to take a detour first), and they also committed mortal sin by depriving you of your Sunday obligation. It is a sin to show up late to Mass if you can reasonably make it on time…of course sometimes variables out of our control impede this, such as in your case. I believe in order to fulfill your Sunday obligation, you must be there prior to the reading of the Gospel…I think. Now if we sum everything up, no you didn’t fulfill your Sunday obligation, but it was due to circumstances beyond your control, so therefore you did not commit mortal sin…no need to confess or abstain from The Eucharist. IT is the same as if you were too sick to make it to Mass. Now your parents on the other hand…I believe they could qualify for commiting mortal sin…but again, I am not completely sure. I hope this helps.
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JMJ_Pinoy:
My family and I usually attend Mass every Sunday at 5 pm. Today, however, we came to Mass really late (we walked in when the priest was finishing up the homily). The reason why we were late was b/c we went to the cemetery to drop off some flowers at my grandmother’s grave. Apparently, my father thought it would get dark soon (which is ridiculous b/c it’s daylight savings times) so he took us to the cemetery first. Even if it would get dark soon, it’s not like we should put visiting my grandma’s grave before attending Mass.

We arrived at the church about half an hour late, so I tried to stay in the car b/c I was so upset. But my parents forced me to go. So I felt really bad about coming to Mass so late that I did not go up for communion b/c I felt it would be wrong to do so. But my mother still went up for communion and she even tried to get me to go too, but I refused. So after the Mass, my parents were saying things like it doesn’t matter if you’re late for Mass, it’s not like it’s a class or something and it doesn’t matter as long as you don’t sin, but I thought that not coming to Mass or coming really late is a sin b/c of the commandment to keep the sabbath day holy. So is it a sin to come to Mass late, and should I confess b/c I came to Mass late? Would it have been wrong for me to receive communion, or would it have been ok?
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I know being late for mass is a sin but I didn’t know it was a Mortal one. Wow! How late do you need to be for this to be true? Each week literally fighting with two little ones to get ready for Mass makes us quite late sometimes, a little late othertimes, and occasionally we slip in just ahead of the priest. On rare Sundays we actually have time to settle into a state of quiet reflection prior to Mass…until someone starts squirming or crying, or pinching etc.

Mike
 
A follow-up…

yes I know we could just attend a later mass but I like to try to get to 9:00. Once we get the 5 yr old into his church clothes we really don’t make backward progress and let him change back into play clothes. and he can’t stay in his church clothes 'cause he’ll be covered with dog & cat hairs if he does. Besides he’s got CCD (or RE as they call it these days) and I like for him to go to mass before this so what they discuss will make sense to him. And to be 100% honest I really dislike going to 11:15 mass because half the day is shot by the time we get home.

Mike
 
What if I’m like 5 minutes late? Is that a mortal sin? I didn’t see that in the Catechism. But… I have been wrong before,
 
I don’t think so…what I have always heard and I could be wrong, is that you must make it there before the Gospel in order for it to fulfill your Sunday obligation. Of course…extraordinary variables beyond our control negate this.
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nike248:
What if I’m like 5 minutes late? Is that a mortal sin? I didn’t see that in the Catechism. But… I have been wrong before,
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dumspirospero:
WEll…I could be wrong…but this is my opinion…since you were with your family who was responsible for you arriving to Mass on time, and you truly wanted to be there…extraordinary circumstances prevented you from doing so…then therefore you did not commit mortal sin. I do believe off the info you gave that your parents did commit mortal sin by not arriving on time (because they made the choice to take a detour first), and they also committed mortal sin by depriving you of your Sunday obligation. It is a sin to show up late to Mass if you can reasonably make it on time…of course sometimes variables out of our control impede this, such as in your case. I believe in order to fulfill your Sunday obligation, you must be there prior to the reading of the Gospel…I think. Now if we sum everything up, no you didn’t fulfill your Sunday obligation, but it was due to circumstances beyond your control, so therefore you did not commit mortal sin…no need to confess or abstain from The Eucharist. IT is the same as if you were too sick to make it to Mass. Now your parents on the other hand…I believe they could qualify for commiting mortal sin…but again, I am not completely sure. I hope this helps.
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This summation sounds right to me. It sounds to me like the fault lies with your parents, not you. I’m sorry you were so distraught. 😦
 
If you are habitually late, how about trying to get there 45 minutes early? At least then if you’re “late” you’re still on time. You can’t blame anybody but yourself. If it takes a certain amount of time to dress your kids, then add that amount of time to how EARLY you start getting ready. On top of that, add a 10-15 minute buffer in ADDITION to the time you KNOW it will take.

What’s the worst case? You get there 15 minutes early and either a) sit in the parking lot or b) go inside and pray. How about taking your kids to the church nursery? Most medium-size and up parishes have nurseries for the kids at the big masses (e.g. 9am and 11am). Believe me, those of us who are there to worship would love to not have to be distracted by your kids who have no interest whatsoever in being there and wander up and down the pews while we kneel, babbling, talk, roll around like untrained dogs, etc.

-Michael
 
Well, here’s my two cents…

I don’t think being late for Mass is a sin per se. The sin would be in not fulfilling your Sunday obligation to attend Mass.

I will occasionally attend a Mass on the spur of the moment - either weekday or weekend. Maybe in a new community, or a church that I pass by. Maybe because I find myself in front of my church at Mass time. Sometimes I get there early, sometimes on time, sometimes late. But regardless, I still will go and be present for whatever portion of the Mass I make it for.

Certainly entering a Mass after it has started is not a sin, per se. You may or may not be able to count it as part of the Sunday obligation, but that isn’t what I’m talking about.

Failing to attend Mass on Sunday is the sin. I have no idea how much of a Mass is required to make it “count”. If I’m in doubt, I just go again.
 
I did some web surfing because I remembered some specific rules from my youth; it seems however after some of the liturgical reforms those are no longer considered valid. Here is an answer from the EWTN site, I found other similar answers elsewhere:

Like most priests, I am loath to give a straight answer to this question because, in a way, it is a catch-22 question for which there is no right answer.
Code: 
  It is true that before the Second Vatican Council some moral theology        manuals placed arrival before the offertory as the dividing line in        deciding whether one fulfilled the Sunday obligation of assistance at        Mass. But after the liturgical reform, with its emphasis on the overall        unity of the Mass, modern theologians shy away from such exactitude. 
  
  Mass begins with the entrance procession and ends after the final        dismissal and we should be there from beginning to end. Each part of the        Mass relates and complements the others in a single act of worship even        though some parts, such as the consecration, are essential while others        are merely important. 
  
  To say that there is a particular moment before or after which we are        either "out" or "safe," so to speak, is to give the wrong message and hint        that, in the long run, some parts of the Mass are really not all that        important. It may also give some less fervent souls a yardstick for        arriving in a tardy manner. 
  
  Although I prefer not to hazard giving a precise cutoff moment, certainly        someone who arrives after the consecration has not attended Mass, should        not receive Communion, and if it is a Sunday, go to another Mass. 
  
  Arriving on time is not just a question of obligation but of love and        respect for Our Lord who has gathered us together to share his gifts, and        who has some grace to communicate to us in each part of the Mass. 
  
  It is also a sign of respect for the community with whom we worship and        who deserves our presence and the contribution of our prayers in each        moment. The liturgy is essentially the worship of Christ's body, the        Church. Each assembly is called upon to represent and manifest the whole        body but this can hardly happen if it forms itself in drips and drabs        after the celebration has begun. 
  
  Thus people who arrive late to Mass have to honestly ask themselves, Why?        If they arrive late because of some justified reason or unforeseen event,        such as blocked traffic due to an accident, they have acted in good        conscience and are not strictly obliged to assist at a later Mass        (although they would do well to do so if they arrive very late and it is        possible for them). 
  
  Likewise for many elderly people, even getting to the church is an        odyssey, and one must not burden their consciences by counting the        minutes. 
  
  If people arrive late due to culpable negligence, and especially if they        do so habitually, then they need to seriously reflect on their attitudes,        amend their ways, and if necessary seek the sacrament of reconciliation.       
  
  Depending on how late they arrive they should prefer to honor the Lord's        day by attending some other Mass, or, if this is not possible, at least        remain in the Church after Mass is over and dedicate some time to prayer        and reflection on the readings of the day.
 
Thanks awalt, that’s good to know.
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travellinmike:
Each week literally fighting with two little ones to get ready for Mass makes us quite late sometimes, a little late othertimes, and occasionally we slip in just ahead of the priest. On rare Sundays we actually have time to settle into a state of quiet reflection prior to Mass…until someone starts squirming or crying, or pinching etc.
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I have the same problem. On the occassions that the children are dressed early for Mass, they frequently begin to undress while I get the others ready. It’s frustrating to load someone in the car only to discover barefeet with shoes who-knows-where.

For those of you who look at families with small children arriving late with distain, please don’t. You have no idea of what we have to go through to get there at all! The Catechism (2181) lists the care of infants as a serious reason for missing Mass, so I suspect it’s fair to assume caring for an infant is also a valid reason for arriving late.

As to the original poster comment that you were late because the family was bringing flowers to your grandmother’s grave, I assume that isn’t an activity that makes you late each and every Sunday. This sounds like an attempt by your parents to honor their mother (and mother in law). While I think they are wrong to say “it doesn’t matter if your late”, I doubt that their efforts to honor their deceased parent would be horribly offensive to God. Maybe they could have planned better, but the death of a mother can be difficult. Don’t judge your parents too harshly or that might be a sin.
 
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