Left high and dry :(

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ibkc

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I started RCIA without a sponsor. The RCIA director at the parish I have been attending said it would be no problem; they have volunteers who act as sponsors and I would be paired up with one. As late as two weeks ago, he assured us that he had it taken care of. Tonight at class, he was taking around a sheet where we were to write in the name of our sponsor next to our names. When he got to me, he told me, “You don’t have one? You’d better get one, it’s less than two weeks away!” I was … stunned. I understand that they have a problem with getting enough volunteers, but I am really upset that he wasn’t just up front about it to begin with, so I could have time to find someone. I also was upset that he acted like he’d never promised that he was coordinating sponsors for the class.

I am new at the parish and kind of shy and I just haven’t made any friends to ask. My mother has a couple of Catholic friends and I am going to ask one of them, but I feel really bad and intrusive asking someone to give up two to three hours on Easter vigil on such short notice.

I guess the worst thing that could happen is that I can’t find a sponsor and have to wait another year. :crying:
 
ibkc said:
I started RCIA without a sponsor. The RCIA director at the parish I have been attending said it would be no problem; they have volunteers who act as sponsors and I would be paired up with one. As late as two weeks ago, he assured us that he had it taken care of. Tonight at class, he was taking around a sheet where we were to write in the name of our sponsor next to our names. When he got to me, he told me, “You don’t have one? You’d better get one, it’s less than two weeks away!” I was … stunned. I understand that they have a problem with getting enough volunteers, but I am really upset that he wasn’t just up front about it to begin with, so I could have time to find someone. I also was upset that he acted like he’d never promised that he was coordinating sponsors for the class.

I am new at the parish and kind of shy and I just haven’t made any friends to ask. My mother has a couple of Catholic friends and I am going to ask one of them, but I feel really bad and intrusive asking someone to give up two to three hours on Easter vigil on such short notice.

I guess the worst thing that could happen is that I can’t find a sponsor and have to wait another year. :crying:
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Somebody will be thrilled and honored to sponsor you. It’s not an imposition or intrusive of you to ask. I’m so sorry they left you hanging like that. Praying that God will send you the right person. :gopray2:
 
I can’t image anyone feeling “put out” by sponsoring you. Personally, I’d think it was a HUGE honor. I’ll keep you in my prayers and God Bless!

–k
 
yes, I believe that you should pray to have a right sponsor and trust in Him.
 
ibkc said:
I started RCIA without a sponsor. “You don’t have one? You’d better get one, it’s less than two weeks away!” I was … stunned. I understand that they have a problem with getting enough volunteers, but I am really upset that he wasn’t just up front about it to begin with, so I could have time to find someone. I also was upset that he acted like he’d never promised that he was coordinating sponsors for the class.
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Welcome! Contact your parish office and have them post the need in the weekly bulletin. “Someone” dropped the ball here, and it was not you.

May the Gracious Lord send a fitting sponsor.

Christ’s peace.
 
ibkc said:
I started RCIA without a sponsor. The RCIA director at the parish I have been attending said it would be no problem; they have volunteers who act as sponsors and I would be paired up with one. As late as two weeks ago, he assured us that he had it taken care of. Tonight at class, he was taking around a sheet where we were to write in the name of our sponsor next to our names. When he got to me, he told me, “You don’t have one? You’d better get one, it’s less than two weeks away!” I was … stunned. I understand that they have a problem with getting enough volunteers, but I am really upset that he wasn’t just up front about it to begin with, so I could have time to find someone. I also was upset that he acted like he’d never promised that he was coordinating sponsors for the class.

I am new at the parish and kind of shy and I just haven’t made any friends to ask. My mother has a couple of Catholic friends and I am going to ask one of them, but I feel really bad and intrusive asking someone to give up two to three hours on Easter vigil on such short notice.

I guess the worst thing that could happen is that I can’t find a sponsor and have to wait another year. :crying:
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No of course you would not have to wait another year. One of the other sponsors could sponsor both you and the other person. If you know of someone who qualifies and knows you but can’t be present a person can stand in a Proxy for them at the Easter Vigil. Techinically I could even be your Sponsor by Proxy. So don’t worry. Speak with the pastor if necessary.
 
I understand and this is fairly common. There are many ways to handle it. Often a senior citizen will perform this duty after being asked by the Priest or Deacon. I have even seen Sisters travel to perform the duty. The enlightening part is the willingness of total strangers to stand up for you. The sad part is you may not have a relationship with the official sponsor ( also called a Godparent) Often the official sponsor is not present while a person stands in at the ceremony (this is the proxy). One big issue is age; if the catechumen is young the sponsor takes on a bigger duty to assure the young Catholic knows the Church. If the catechumen is an adult the RCIA process opens the knowledge of the Church to the adult so the duty is small.
 
Br.Rich_SFO said:
No of course you would not have to wait another year. One of the other sponsors could sponsor both you and the other person. If you know of someone who qualifies and knows you but can’t be present a person can stand in a Proxy for them at the Easter Vigil. Techinically I could even be your Sponsor by Proxy. So don’t worry. Speak with the pastor if necessary.
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Br. Rich, does the person standing in as a proxy for the sponsor have to be Catholic? (Forgive me if this is a basic question that I should know the answer to!) My situation is that I live a very Protestant area, and there are very few Catholics among my family’s friends. I am trying to get in touch with one of my mother’s friends who might be able to help, and if she can’t, I suppose I’ll have to talk to the parochial vicar (he is the one who has been involved with us in RCIA - I’ve never even actually met the pastor.) I feel kind of sick at the thought of not being able to be confirmed. I have been looking forward to it so much. 😦
 
ibkc said:
Br. Rich, does the person standing in as a proxy for the sponsor have to be Catholic? (Forgive me if this is a basic question that I should know the answer to!) My situation is that I live a very Protestant area, and there are very few Catholics among my family’s friends. I am trying to get in touch with one of my mother’s friends who might be able to help, and if she can’t, I suppose I’ll have to talk to the parochial vicar (he is the one who has been involved with us in RCIA - I’ve never even actually met the pastor.) I feel kind of sick at the thought of not being able to be confirmed. I have been looking forward to it so much. 😦
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You will be Confirmed! I don’t believe that anything is specified for the requirements of the proxy. It is the other person’s (the real Sponsor) who’s name is entered in the records. When we have used a proxy. They were always from the parish and the other (sponsor) lived across the country and missed a flight connection or was sick.
 
hello ibkc,
I’m sorry your RCIA director dropped the ball on this – it’s important that you phone your parochial vicar or director about this issue today, if you can. They need to have someone in mind for you soon, in case there’s noone in your family who is eligible and willing. If you do have someone in mind to be your sponsor, technically, he/she needs to be screened and found eligible. A sponsor must be a practicing Catholic, confirmed, at least 16 years of age, and be faithful to all the Church’s teachings (including adherence to moral teachings, such as no sex outside of marriage, no contraception). He/she must be willing to say “yes” to accompanying you on your journey of faith. Your sponsor is a link to the faith community and is expected to help you to increasingly participate in it.
Welcome “home.”
 
Well, my mother’s friend said she would do it. Thank you all for your help and prayers. 🙂
 
ibkc said:
Well, my mother’s friend said she would do it. Thank you all for your help and prayers. 🙂
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God bless both of you! Prayers for your final week and a half or so before your Confirmation:).

Brenda V.
 
ibkc said:
Well, my mother’s friend said she would do it. Thank you all for your help and prayers. 🙂
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Cool! Get with you RCIA director, because your mom’s friend will need some sort of document from her home Parish that states she is a Catholic in good standing. Your RCIA team will need to have that document on file before the Vigil.
 
kage_ar said:
Cool! Get with you RCIA director, because your mom’s friend will need some sort of document from her home Parish that states she is a Catholic in good standing. Your RCIA team will need to have that document on file before the Vigil.
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I did - I sent him an email a while ago! I feel a lot better about everything now.
 
ibkc said:
I did - I sent him an email a while ago! I feel a lot better about everything now.
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The Lord always provides. This was a mini-test of your faith. His Goodness will see you through anything you may face in life.

Have a most blessed Holy Week and welcome home!
 
Congrats ibkc!! Welcome Home!
The vigil will be even more special for you now!!
One of the core team member certainly could of steped in and been you sponsor as well.

Relax, Have Fun and HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!!!
 
Thank you, sbanks! I am so very excited. Saturday night can’t come soon enough!
 
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