Left, or right?

[Lizzie08]

okay so, I am leaning from side to side waaay too much! One way is, becoming a consecrated nun, and the other is marriage. Which side do I fall on?!

Being a nun would be such a beautiful vocation. when in Mass or just in front of the tabernacle, I feel this great sense of peace and i dont ever want to leave it. And when peace embaces me, I can’t help but want to Leave myself entirley and become a nun. Yes, i know that peace won’t always be constant, but it is such a wonderful gift, and I just want to give back! And becoming a nun would be the best way to do it!

The joy of having your own family! oh my lantah!! I love kids and I love them, and did i say I love them?? Yuh just can’t get enough of them. really! being surrounded by my nieses and nephews has increased my want of having my own children. They are truely a Blessing and they also are wonderful gifts! And having a husband, somebody that is visably there and helps me and our children daily to get to Heaven, and vise versa, is just so amazing to ponder.

pray pray pray! Trust trust trust! I know is the answer, but Im just seeing if I can get some advice

Thanks so much!
God Bless!!

 

[bkayw]

Marriage, family and teach at a Catholic school?

Marriage, family and teach CCD for youth?

Join a teaching order?

Join an order whose mission is caring for abandoned children?

 

[Lizzie08]

yeah that all sounds great! I actually have looked into the Dominican convent,( which they do alot of community things) but I dont think they have any in Arizona?? Anywho, What exactly is a CCD??

And thank you for your suggestions, i appreciate it!
May God Bless you

 

[DaughterOfMary6]

While I can’t offer any real advice, I do sympathize. I had the same trouble for about 2 years. Before my reversion, marriage and the single life were the only paths I was aware of. I didn’t think of them as vocations. I was sure I was going to get married and have a large family. I only knew of the priesthood as a vocation and it was for men only. I thought Sisters were older women who couldn’t get married for some reason. Then, when I came back to the Church at the end of 2007, my eyes were opened to the beauty of a religious vocation and I met some wonderful Sisters at a retreat. It was about 2 months later when I decided to start looking at religious communities and see if I felt called to go to visit any of them, but I didn’t know where to start. So I decided that maybe I needed to wait a while. That lasted for about 4 months, and in between, I started to plan my life around a religious vocation. I thought of going to college and being a veterinarian before I got married. In that 4 months, I didn’t even think of being a nun at all.

Then, somehow, I came across a religious order’s Facebook page and the thought popped into my head again. It was at that time that a young woman and I started emailing and I discovered that she was a candidate for a religious order, the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus in Kirkwood, MO. She and I talked about religious life, especially our fears and desires. My interest grew and I began to look at religious communities again. With the help of this young lady, I found out about Vision Network and the Institute for Religious Life and I searched for a good community to visit. (That young lady is now a first-year novice with the Sisters!)

I visited her community and another of the same order in Milwaukee, WI. I was very close to entering in Milwaukee, but it was not to be. I also visited the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal this January, and that was the extent of my “Come and See” visits as I am kind of poor. I contacted several others with the hope that I might be able to visit them someday, but I have an illness that is a problem with many communities–depression and anxiety. It recently returned in July after I had a lot of stress at work and I had to leave. Before then, I had been praying for a sign that I was called to religious life still because the desire to be a nun faded in March. I didn’t want to be a nun anymore. I was kind of anxious about entering a convent and I started to dread going to anymore “Come and See” retreats. I thought it was just temptations and they started in December 2009 when I felt attracted to marriage again. I just brushed it off and kept discerning. But I couldn’t get away from the fact that something was wrong. Then when I got the depression again, I knew that God was telling me that I was not called to religious life. I was upset at first because I felt like I had been led to believe I was and then the desire was quickly taken from me. But the more I prayed, the more I felt completely at peace with the idea that I was not going to be a nun. Now I am discerning marriage with the hope of becoming a Third Order Dominican tertiary in the very near future.

I guess the only advice I can give is to remain open to whatever God wants. My journey has taken me places I never dreamed of and I feel I learned something wonderful that I can apply to my life in the future.

If you don’t already have a spiritual director, now would be a good time to get one. Also, pray for the saints’ intercession. The Blessed Virgin Mary is a great help in times of confusion!

 

[Lizzie08]

While I can’t offer any real advice, I do sympathize. I had the same trouble for about 2 years. Before my reversion, marriage and the single life were the only paths I was aware of. I didn’t think of them as vocations. I was sure I was going to get married and have a large family. I only knew of the priesthood as a vocation and it was for men only. I thought Sisters were older women who couldn’t get married for some reason. Then, when I came back to the Church at the end of 2007, my eyes were opened to the beauty of a religious vocation and I met some wonderful Sisters at a retreat. It was about 2 months later when I decided to start looking at religious communities and see if I felt called to go to visit any of them, but I didn’t know where to start. So I decided that maybe I needed to wait a while. That lasted for about 4 months, and in between, I started to plan my life around a religious vocation. I thought of going to college and being a veterinarian before I got married. In that 4 months, I didn’t even think of being a nun at all.

Then, somehow, I came across a religious order’s Facebook page and the thought popped into my head again. It was at that time that a young woman and I started emailing and I discovered that she was a candidate for a religious order, the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus in Kirkwood, MO. She and I talked about religious life, especially our fears and desires. My interest grew and I began to look at religious communities again. With the help of this young lady, I found out about Vision Network and the Institute for Religious Life and I searched for a good community to visit. (That young lady is now a first-year novice with the Sisters!)

I visited her community and another of the same order in Milwaukee, WI. I was very close to entering in Milwaukee, but it was not to be. I also visited the Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal this January, and that was the extent of my “Come and See” visits as I am kind of poor. I contacted several others with the hope that I might be able to visit them someday, but I have an illness that is a problem with many communities–depression and anxiety. It recently returned in July after I had a lot of stress at work and I had to leave. Before then, I had been praying for a sign that I was called to religious life still because the desire to be a nun faded in March. I didn’t want to be a nun anymore. I was kind of anxious about entering a convent and I started to dread going to anymore “Come and See” retreats. I thought it was just temptations and they started in December 2009 when I felt attracted to marriage again. I just brushed it off and kept discerning. But I couldn’t get away from the fact that something was wrong. Then when I got the depression again, I knew that God was telling me that I was not called to religious life. I was upset at first because I felt like I had been led to believe I was and then the desire was quickly taken from me. But the more I prayed, the more I felt completely at peace with the idea that I was not going to be a nun. Now I am discerning marriage with the hope of becoming a Third Order Dominican tertiary in the very near future.

I guess the only advice I can give is to remain open to whatever God wants. My journey has taken me places I never dreamed of and I feel I learned something wonderful that I can apply to my life in the future.

If you don’t already have a spiritual director, now would be a good time to get one. Also, pray for the saints’ intercession. The Blessed Virgin Mary is a great help in times of confusion!

Thank you for sharing your story It’s nice to know that i’m not alone on this!

I wanted to go on a retreat, but It was suggested that i shouldn’t because i’m not baptised yet. So that lead me to think, maybe I just need have patience. Unfortunately my patience didnt last very long, and I started to carve my own path. But from there on, things just kept getting darker and darker. I wasn’t necissarily depresseed, but I certainly wasn’t happy.

Because of learning about your journey, I have been brought back to “maybe I just need to have patience.” Maybe, I am just not ready for my vocation to be known. Maybe, God still has work to do within me. I have also come to realize that discernment is not supposed to be easy. You have to be weak in order to be strong, is the way I see it. It’s also just a matter of being consistent with prayer, trust, and remembering who you are living for.

So I thank you again! You have resurfaced alot of important details that I need to know in my journey of faith. And I hope that you will continue to find peace in what ever you do.

 

[SalesianSDB]

Have you ever looked into the Salesian Sisters of Don Bosco?

 

[DaughterOfMary6]

Thank you for sharing your story It’s nice to know that i’m not alone on this!

I wanted to go on a retreat, but It was suggested that i shouldn’t because i’m not baptised yet. So that lead me to think, maybe I just need have patience. Unfortunately my patience didnt last very long, and I started to carve my own path. But from there on, things just kept getting darker and darker. I wasn’t necissarily depresseed, but I certainly wasn’t happy.

Because of learning about your journey, I have been brought back to “maybe I just need to have patience.” Maybe, I am just not ready for my vocation to be known. Maybe, God still has work to do within me. I have also come to realize that discernment is not supposed to be easy. You have to be weak in order to be strong, is the way I see it. It’s also just a matter of being consistent with prayer, trust, and remembering who you are living for.

So I thank you again! You have resurfaced alot of important details that I need to know in my journey of faith. And I hope that you will continue to find peace in what ever you do.

You’re welcome! Yes, I must emphasize patience. I found that in the course of my own discernment, I was always rushing things. I met an order one time and decided to apply to join but I didn’t know that much about them and when the Superior asked me to work in their apostolate for neglected children, I discovered how wrong I was. That’s not to say that I didn’t learn something from it, because it taught me not to rush things.

I am a very emotional person and sometimes I can be very impulsive–reacting on the first reaction I have–instead of taking a cool and collected approach to things. Also, I noticed that I was creating stories of my vocational discernment to make them sound better because, to me, mine sounded so boring. That sent up a flag right there. Why would I need to do that? I was very immature. I even confessed to a friend that I was having trouble with the truth and she told me that it didn’t matter as much as what I felt in my heart and to let Jesus be my guide, but I just felt like something was wrong. I think, in the beginning, I was only seeking a vocation because I liked the Sisters at the retreat–not because I wanted to serve God. I was very focused on outside appearances such as the habit, prayer life of the nuns, etc. Towards the end, however, all that was stripped away and I began to see what religious life really was and how I wasn’t meant for it. God showed me in such a gentle way.

One of the most important things in religious discernment is building up a relationship with Jesus through prayer, Adoration, Mass, Confession, etc. All the other stuff will come with it. This way, you will get to know God’s will and be better prepared. Find a spiritual director and work on creating a schedule of each day, kind of like a community’s horarium. Develop a routine of daily prayer. All of this helps tremendously!

If I can be of any help to you further, please let me know. I have some great resources and I am big on research so I would love to help anyone discerning as I know how confusing it can be at times! God bless.

 

[Lizzie08]

Have you ever looked into the Salesian Sisters of Don Bosco?

Actually no I haven’t, but Don Bosco is one of my favorite saints! I am so excited to learn that there is a convent dedicated to Him. If I were to join the religious life, I would want to follow in his foot steps.

Judging by your name, are you a Salesian Sister?

May God Bless you

 

[challam2010]

The religious life is actually one you can “try on for size” and see if it fits, unlike marriage, which is forever.

Every order receives candidates (postulants) for a period of a few months to a year, and every order has a novitiate period (variable number of years, depending on the order.) It is literally years before you make a perpetual commitment to this way of life – long enough to determine if this is where God wants you, and if you’re suited for the life.

Most dioceses have vocation directors, and every order has a path to entrance – start with finding one (or more) that you are drawn to because of their mission, their spirituality – and whatever other criteria you may have. All orders welcome inquiries and will help you with your decision.

An inclination toward religious life is only one sign of a vocation – but it may be a whisper in your ear from God – and the only thing on earth worth doing is His will.

Pray to know God’s will and seek advice from local sources.

Check on the internet for various religious orders and see which may suit you the best, what the requirements for entrance are and what opportunities you may have to discern in a particular order.

Giving up marriage and family is a huge sacrifice – but if you’re called to the religious life, it is certainly possible and you will be supported and rewarded with joy by the Spirit in giving the gift of your life.

If you seek to do God’s will with a sincere heart, He will listen to your prayers and help make your decision - guaranteed.

I wish you the best in this discernment process.

 

[Lizzie08]

You’re welcome! Yes, I must emphasize patience. I found that in the course of my own discernment, I was always rushing things. I met an order one time and decided to apply to join but I didn’t know that much about them and when the Superior asked me to work in their apostolate for neglected children, I discovered how wrong I was. That’s not to say that I didn’t learn something from it, because it taught me not to rush things.

I am a very emotional person and sometimes I can be very impulsive–reacting on the first reaction I have–instead of taking a cool and collected approach to things. Also, I noticed that I was creating stories of my vocational discernment to make them sound better because, to me, mine sounded so boring. That sent up a flag right there. Why would I need to do that? I was very immature. I even confessed to a friend that I was having trouble with the truth and she told me that it didn’t matter as much as what I felt in my heart and to let Jesus be my guide, but I just felt like something was wrong. I think, in the beginning, I was only seeking a vocation because I liked the Sisters at the retreat–not because I wanted to serve God. I was very focused on outside appearances such as the habit, prayer life of the nuns, etc. Towards the end, however, all that was stripped away and I began to see what religious life really was and how I wasn’t meant for it. God showed me in such a gentle way.

One of the most important things in religious discernment is building up a relationship with Jesus through prayer, Adoration, Mass, Confession, etc. All the other stuff will come with it. This way, you will get to know God’s will and be better prepared. Find a spiritual director and work on creating a schedule of each day, kind of like a community’s horarium. Develop a routine of daily prayer. All of this helps tremendously!

If I can be of any help to you further, please let me know. I have some great resources and I am big on research so I would love to help anyone discerning as I know how confusing it can be at times! God bless.

Isnt Discernment a Beautiful process? Not only do you find yourself and strengthen your weaknesses, you also are developing a greater relationship with our Savior.

It is so great to hear, or read I should say, that you have found were you are suppose to be in life. What a Joy that must be!

Your advice is great! Thank you , I will most certainly consider them. I think Praying on a daily routine would really help me! I also need to start praying more at night, but it’s hard to because i’m usually really tired. I just need to be a better time manager. Anywho, source recommendations would be greatly appreiciated! I really like learning and reading, especially when it comes to God and the His Church.

Once again, I thank you for sharing your experiences! They are inspiring to me and are helping me with my jouney

May God Bless You

 

[Lizzie08]

The religious life is actually one you can “try on for size” and see if it fits, unlike marriage, which is forever.

Every order receives candidates (postulants) for a period of a few months to a year, and every order has a novitiate period (variable number of years, depending on the order.) It is literally years before you make a perpetual commitment to this way of life – long enough to determine if this is where God wants you, and if you’re suited for the life.

Most dioceses have vocation directors, and every order has a path to entrance – start with finding one (or more) that you are drawn to because of their mission, their spirituality – and whatever other criteria you may have. All orders welcome inquiries and will help you with your decision.

An inclination toward religious life is only one sign of a vocation – but it may be a whisper in your ear from God – and the only thing on earth worth doing is His will.

Pray to know God’s will and seek advice from local sources.

Check on the internet for various religious orders and see which may suit you the best, what the requirements for entrance are and what opportunities you may have to discern in a particular order.

Giving up marriage and family is a huge sacrifice – but if you’re called to the religious life, it is certainly possible and you will be supported and rewarded with joy by the Spirit in giving the gift of your life.

If you seek to do God’s will with a sincere heart, He will listen to your prayers and help make your decision - guaranteed.

I wish you the best in this discernment process.

This information helps me alot! It reminds me that I really have nothing to worry about.
Is also gives me a better understanding of the religious life and the process that will take place. Thanks so much!

May God Bless You

 

[wxboss]

Hello Lizzie,

I recently started a blog to help those who are discerning a vocation. The discerning process can bring a lot of joy, but the hard part is chugging through the desert to reach the oasis.

I’m going through this process in parts. and taking the readers with me. I want it to be mutual endeavor where we all journey together and learn along the way.

If you’re having a difficult time at it, stop on by and hopefully we can go through this together.