Legal Divorce and Catholic remarriage

[BensCAA]

So I’ve heard divorce is a sin. I am not a Catholic, but interested in becoming one. I have posted my story but basically I was raised Protestant and married a woman who was raised Catholic, but we were both atheists when we married and there was nothing about God or the church involved in any way.

If I join the church, I’ve been told it can be annulled or that it was invalid anyways since it was outside of the Church and she was Catholic. Where does this rule come from and is that right? Is my divorce sinful? Why would I be free to remarry even though we did marry legally?

 

[Fauken]

If I join the church, I’ve been told it can be annulled or that it was invalid anyways since it was outside of the Church and she was Catholic. Where does this rule come from and is that right? Is my divorce sinful? Why would I be free to remarry even though we did marry legally?

Your safest bet is to contact your diocesan Tribunal and have them investigate your marriage and make a ruling on it. That would be my suggestion.

 

[whatistrue]

So I’ve heard divorce is a sin.

That is incorrect. Divorce is not per se sinful, it is simply a secular (state) act rather than a Church act and does not sever a valid marital bond as far as the Church is concerned. Whether a given marriage is valid or not is a matter for the Diocesan Tribunal to determine, under most circumstances. Short answer - ask your priest.

 

[BensCAA]

I guess my next question would be: how is a marriage invalid in the first place? I mean, we did commit the act of marriage. Was marriage within the Church what the Early Church was talking about in the New Testament, or did this idea of invalid marriages come up later on?

 

[Elizabeth3]

This might help you understand what the Church sees as marriage (both natural and sacramental).

Natural marriage - Wikipedia

 

[RyanBlack]

I guess my next question would be: how is a marriage invalid in the first place?

For a marriage to be valid, both parties must be free to marry (basically meaning not already in a valid marriage), and both must freely consent. Also, Catholics must marry according to Church law for a marriage to be valid. Then, there is the issue of impediments. For example, the parties are impeded from marrying if they are too closely related. This is a simplistic account. For individual scenarios, consult a priest.

 

[whatistrue]

how is a marriage invalid in the first place?

Check the website of your Diocese. Most will have a section about the general types of cases which may give you a general idea, but always ask your priest for specific advice about your particular situation.

 

[1ke]

So I’ve heard divorce is a sin.

What you should have heard is that divorce can be a sin against marriage, the sixth commandment (in Catholic numbering).

Sometimes it is not a sin, as there can be just reasons for separating physically from a spouse and seeking legal recourse also.

If I join the church, I’ve been told it can be annulled or that it was invalid anyways since it was outside of the Church and she was Catholic.

Actually because she is a Catholic who married outside the Church form without dispensation, it isn’t a decree of nullity at all. It’s merely an administrative process. Such an attempt at marriage does not enjoy the favor of the law as to validity. It is not valid.

Where does this rule come from and is that right?

Yes it is correct. Catholics are bound by the laws of the Church (canon law) and the requires form is part of canon law.

Is my divorce sinful?

Since your marriage attempt was not valid in the Church, dissolving the legal bond is morally neutral. Although you certainly do have a moral obligation to any child support or spousal support ordered by the court.

Why would I be free to remarry even though we did marry legally?

Yes. After an administrative process to review the relevant paperwork and declare you free to marry.

 

[1ke]

I guess my next question would be: how is a marriage invalid in the first place?

Because the Church says so, basically. The Church has authority over her members and requires that they marry before a priest or his designee and two witnesses for a Catholic to validly contract marriage. A Catholic can only marry a non-Catholic outside Catholic form if the bishop dispenses them from form.

Further, a Catholic needs a dispensation from disparity of cult to marry an unbaptized person validly.

The Church also imposes minimum age requirements, restrictions on degrees of kinship, etc.

For other reasons a marriage may be invalid, I can recommend the book Annulment: The Wedding That Was by Michael Smith Foster.

Was marriage within the Church what the Early Church was talking about in the New Testament, or did this idea of invalid marriages come up later on?

From the beginning the Church regulated marriage among the faithful, you can see this in very early canons of various councils of the Church.

But the Church did accept whatever the civil or customary form of marriage was in the cultures of the places where the Church spread.

The Church did not impose what is still the current Catholic form of marriage until the Council of Trent.

 

[TheLittleLady]

That is incorrect.

There are very narrow times when divorce is tolerated, CCC:

If civil divorce remains the only possible way of ensuring certain legal rights, the care of the children, or the protection of inheritance, it can be tolerated and does not constitute a moral offense.

2384 Divorce is a grave offense against the natural law. It claims to break the contract, to which the spouses freely consented, to live with each other till death. Divorce does injury to the covenant of salvation, of which sacramental marriage is the sign. Contracting a new union, even if it is recognized by civil law, adds to the gravity of the rupture: the remarried spouse is then in a situation of public and permanent adultery:

If a husband, separated from his wife, approaches another woman, he is an adulterer because he makes that woman commit adultery, and the woman who lives with him is an adulteress, because she has drawn another’s husband to herself.178
2385 Divorce is immoral also because it introduces disorder into the family and into society. This disorder brings grave harm to the deserted spouse, to children traumatized by the separation of their parents and often torn between them, and because of its contagious effect which makes it truly a plague on society.

2386 It can happen that one of the spouses is the innocent victim of a divorce decreed by civil law; this spouse therefore has not contravened the moral law. There is a considerable difference between a spouse who has sincerely tried to be faithful to the sacrament of marriage and is unjustly abandoned, and one who through his own grave fault destroys a canonically valid marriage.17

 

[TomH1]

So I’ve heard divorce is a sin.

This is a widely held misconception. Of course, sinful acts may lead to it but the legal process itself is not a sin. Divorced Catholics are not refused the sacraments. What I believe many people confuse this with is the fact the if a Catholic divorces the Church still considers them bound by the sacred bond of holy matrimony. Therefore, they are not free to re-marry. If a divorced Catholic were simply to re-marry in a non-Catholic religious ceremony or a civil one he/she would be committing the sin of adultery. For a divorced Catholic to be free to marry again he or she needs a decision by the Church that his/her marriage was invalid. The process varies depending on the circumstances.

If I join the church, I’ve been told it can be annulled or that it was invalid anyways since it was outside of the Church and she was Catholic.

We do not have all the facts but from what you tell us there are two grounds on which you and your wife did not contract a valid marriage. First, as a Catholic your wife was bound to marry according to what the Church calls ‘canonical form’. It appears she did not and as you claim there was no involvement of the Church she was most likely not dispensed from this requirement. This means your marriage is invalid due to lack of form. Also Catholics have an impediment that they must not marry an unbaptised person. This impediment can be dispensed but I doubt it was from your information. This would invalidate your marriage.

here does this rule come from and is that right?

When you say ‘this rule’, you do not make your antecedent very clear. To which rule do you refer?

Why would I be free to remarry even though we did marry legally?

Because the civil legal aspects can be ended by a civil court, i.e. divorce. The competent ecclesiastical authority can rule your marriage is invalid due to lack of canonical form and to at least one impediment of which we know.

If you want to become a Catholic and resolve your marital situation you need to talk to the parish priest either of the parish in which you live or if you are regularly attending a Catholic church the priest there. Priests are used to dealing with this. He will guide you through the process.