*** August 26, 2005 I went back to the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. Obviously. It was a one-year anniversary of seeing Mary. And it was the biggest feast day of the Black Madonna, Our Lady of Czestochowa. I did not know what to expect, except that I did not think I would see any vision of Mary. I went to the 8 o’clock Mass and also to the 12:10 Mass. They sang a new hymn that I didn’t think anyone knew very well – not even Msgr Rossi – #731 “Draw Us in the Spirit’s Tether”. At the 12:10 Mass, a Black Woman sitting up front near the organ started to cry during one of the songs (I think it was #731). I thought perhaps it was the music. Just as the Liturgy of the Eucharist began, Msgr. Rossi paused for a long while and remarked that from here on out there was no good place to stop and make a necessary announcement. Those who have been to the Basilica for years would knew Willa. He explained that for years, Willa had taken it on herself to lead the Rosary before the 12:10 weekday Mass. And for the last six months she had been unable to attend as much as usual. And that she died that morning (August 26, 2005). Then I realized quite a few things. Willa was probably the one who gave me literature about the Confraternity of the Rosary. Willa was probably the one who led us all in praying the Rosary on August 26, 2004. Willa and others at the Basilica had often briefly greeted or helped me as part of their Imitation of Mary. I realized that as Christians we are priviledged to see Mary or Jesus as much as we want – in ourselves. This is our task, to change ourselves. To please God by making ourselves more like Jesus. A year ago, I was not ready to learn that lesson. A year ago, as I knelt to worship Jesus before the Tabernacle (Eucharistic Adoration) in the Crypt Church. I found myself wondering if I was correct or not. I had intellectually concluded that Fulton Sheen was right and that the Catholics were correct about Holy Communion and Transubstantiation. But emotionally and from my cultural background I was wondering if I was guilty – 2 Cor 11:4 “For if someone comes and preaches another Jesus than the one we preached, or if you receive a different spirit from the one you received or a different gospel from the one you accepted, you put up with it well enough.” In my mind, I felt guilty of rejecting the Jesus I had already received and taking another Jesus. I did not expect to know for sure until Judgement Day. It would be futile, but on Judgement Day I might blame Larry or come up with another lame and worthless excuse for why I was now worshipping the Holy Eucharist like a Catholic – the very thing that Jack Chick and others had most greatly despised. Yet, later that day when I saw the beautiful painting of Mary that faded away, I concluded that the Catholics were right about everything all along. As the Young Black Woman who sat near me on the Metro train 08/26/2004 – and then saw me soon after in the Crypt level in the Basilica – said, “You have an eye for beautiful things.” She was absolutely right, in fact that was much of what was wrong with my life. Spending time looking at physical beauty, while neglecting spiritual matters such as conforming to the image of Christ (Romans 12:1-2). But on August 26, 2005, this new message is clear: seeing Jesus or Mary in others or in a vision is much less important than seeing their Holy virtues in myself. I am a long ways away. However, if I continue to pray often it will be best. And the “Prayer to Our Lady of Czestochowa (to be said each day upon arising)” may be the very best thing for me. I praying it each morning (August 31st the third day) but I fail to live up to my end of the deal. But I think I am trying more than I otherwise would.
