Life in the Spirit - slain in the Spirit?

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Someone help me, please! I went to a meeting at my Church tonight called the Upper Room - it’s like a continuation for those who attended a Life in the Spirit seminar recently. I was unable to attend the seminar, but some people made it sound like it was ok for me to go to the Upper Room meeting anyway.
I’m a 27 year old mom of two little kids, been Catholic all my life. Never really encountered the charismatic movement at all. My parents are the type who roll their eyes and do the air quotes whenever they talk about the charismatic movement. I’m not sure how to feel because I totally believe in it, but on the other hand, I’m totally uncomfortable with it and I don’t really understand it. I’m your stereotypical practicing Catholic. I’m good at standing when I’m supposed to stand, kneeling when I’m supposed to kneel, and praying like I’m supposed to pray. I feel comfortable with spontaneous prayer as well, but not as much in front of people because I feel a little like I’m calling attention to myself when I do that. Based on my personality alone, I know surrender isn’t my strong suit. II’m usually pretty rigid and untrusting in general, and I prefer following rules.
So I went to this meeting tonight and I was really eager to be prayed over. I know I want and need the Holy Spirit in my life more. But I had some mixed results. I expected either NOTHING or SOMETHING. What I got was somewhere in between.
I was one of the first to go up and be prayed over tonight, so I didn’t realize I was “supposed” to fall down, slain in the spirit, until the priest said there were catchers at each station. I had to laugh. I just thought I was there to pray, and maybe if God wanted to knock me down, He would. I feel open to falling out if HE’S the one doing it - not if I’M the one doing it. But I didn’t feel knocked down at all. I did feel off balance and light as a feather. I felt like I was swaying back and forth and sort of what I can only describe as an urge to just rest backward, where the “catcher” was standing. Those praying over me kept encouraging me and praying for me to just let go and surrender to it, and in the spirit of “going with it” I let myself fall slightly backwards. But I didn’t want to fall, so I caught myself. The priest told me not to catch myself, which is hard as I’m not in the habit of just falling, like, ever.
They prayed some more and it was like they REALLY wanted me to fall down and expected it. A little while later I again “went with” the feeling to rest, and fell back a little more, and they let me sit on the ground for a while. Maybe this was just the power of suggestion and I’m a faker? I really couldn’t tell. I didn’t “feel” anything, which I thought I was supposed to. I thought being “slain in the Spirit” means you feel overwhelming peace and joy, or something. I just felt awkward, honestly. Sitting there was unpleasant and boring at best.
So I got up after trying to pray awhile and suddenly I WAS overcome. With anger. All I could feel was an anger unlike I usually ever feel - almost a rage. I couldn’t even force myself to sing along to any of the praise songs being played. It wasn’t anger over anything in particular, just a general angry feeling. I noticed I kept crossing my arms and legs and hunching over, as if my body was physically shutting out everything around it. I’d try to relax and open up, but the next time I paid attention to myself, I was a pretzel again. All I could do was cry, and I had a huge headache. I wanted nothing more than to leave that building immediately, and I was so relieved when the priest said it was over and we could go.
So, long story short, I’m thinking I did it wrong. I’m thinking there was some kind of opposite effect for me, where everyone else is getting gifts of the Spirit and I’m getting… deadly sins? I feel awful about the whole experience. I guess my question is, should I try again or wait because I’m obviously not ready? And if I ever go back, what am I supposed to do differently?
 
guiltycatholic said:
. Those praying over me kept encouraging me and praying for me to just let go and surrender to it, and in the spirit of “going with it” I let myself fall slightly backwards. But I didn’t want to fall, so I caught myself. The priest told me not to catch myself, which is hard as I’m not in the habit of just falling, like, ever.
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Surrendering to God has nothing to do with toppling. Openness to God does not always go hand and hand with any particular sensationalist experience. Faith does not rely on the sensuous.

While the Catholic Church allows for a great deal of variety in spiritual experiences, none of these types of spiritualism are Catholicism per se. I would say we should all take a cue from the Church and not be so darn insistent that this type of spiritual experience, or that, is more of anything. It is not more surrendering to the Holy Spirit. It is not more openness to God. It is only more (in this case) vertical instability.

My own experiences with Charismatics are that while they talk about how no one experiences God the same way, when push comes to shove, and some one is not slain, speak in tongues or whatever is in vogue, they equate this in practice to being less in tune with God. Bear in mind that is only my experience, but it seems to bear out in yours.

I would suggest spend some time alone with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. There is no more intimate place to meet Him.

If one really wants the charismatic experience, one can eventually work oneself into. But like you say, if you have to force it, it is not God.
 
I find it hard grasp that the Holy Spirit, the Lord and Giver of Life goes around slaying people.

It’s a completely inappropriate phrase.
 
guiltycatholic said:
Someone help me, please! I went to a meeting at my Church tonight called the Upper Room - it’s like a continuation for those who attended a Life in the Spirit seminar recently. I was unable to attend the seminar, but some people made it sound like it was ok for me to go to the Upper Room meeting anyway.
I’m a 27 year old mom of two little kids, been Catholic all my life. Never really encountered the charismatic movement at all. My parents are the type who roll their eyes and do the air quotes whenever they talk about the charismatic movement. I’m not sure how to feel because I totally believe in it, but on the other hand, I’m totally uncomfortable with it and I don’t really understand it. I’m your stereotypical practicing Catholic. I’m good at standing when I’m supposed to stand, kneeling when I’m supposed to kneel, and praying like I’m supposed to pray. I feel comfortable with spontaneous prayer as well, but not as much in front of people because I feel a little like I’m calling attention to myself when I do that. Based on my personality alone, I know surrender isn’t my strong suit. II’m usually pretty rigid and untrusting in general, and I prefer following rules.
So I went to this meeting tonight and I was really eager to be prayed over. I know I want and need the Holy Spirit in my life more. But I had some mixed results. I expected either NOTHING or SOMETHING. What I got was somewhere in between.
I was one of the first to go up and be prayed over tonight, so I didn’t realize I was “supposed” to fall down, slain in the spirit, until the priest said there were catchers at each station. I had to laugh. I just thought I was there to pray, and maybe if God wanted to knock me down, He would. I feel open to falling out if HE’S the one doing it - not if I’M the one doing it. But I didn’t feel knocked down at all. I did feel off balance and light as a feather. I felt like I was swaying back and forth and sort of what I can only describe as an urge to just rest backward, where the “catcher” was standing. Those praying over me kept encouraging me and praying for me to just let go and surrender to it, and in the spirit of “going with it” I let myself fall slightly backwards. But I didn’t want to fall, so I caught myself. The priest told me not to catch myself, which is hard as I’m not in the habit of just falling, like, ever.
They prayed some more and it was like they REALLY wanted me to fall down and expected it. A little while later I again “went with” the feeling to rest, and fell back a little more, and they let me sit on the ground for a while. Maybe this was just the power of suggestion and I’m a faker? I really couldn’t tell. I didn’t “feel” anything, which I thought I was supposed to. I thought being “slain in the Spirit” means you feel overwhelming peace and joy, or something. I just felt awkward, honestly. Sitting there was unpleasant and boring at best.
So I got up after trying to pray awhile and suddenly I WAS overcome. With anger. All I could feel was an anger unlike I usually ever feel - almost a rage. I couldn’t even force myself to sing along to any of the praise songs being played. It wasn’t anger over anything in particular, just a general angry feeling. I noticed I kept crossing my arms and legs and hunching over, as if my body was physically shutting out everything around it. I’d try to relax and open up, but the next time I paid attention to myself, I was a pretzel again. All I could do was cry, and I had a huge headache. I wanted nothing more than to leave that building immediately, and I was so relieved when the priest said it was over and we could go.
So, long story short, I’m thinking I did it wrong. I’m thinking there was some kind of opposite effect for me, where everyone else is getting gifts of the Spirit and I’m getting… deadly sins? I feel awful about the whole experience. I guess my question is, should I try again or wait because I’m obviously not ready? And if I ever go back, what am I supposed to do differently?
Click to expand...
 
I was in the Charismatic Movement for many years, and still occasionally attend a service. Keep in mind* every *movement and ministry is imperfect. Sometimes good people can get over enthusiastic or “shove the Dove”. In other words they assume 2 things:

That God will always answer prayer (True); and
That God’s response will always manifest itself when, where, and how we tell it to; (False)

Some things should be part of every Catholic’s spirituality - like prayer before the Blessed Sacrament, briefly or at length. Other things Catholics should avoid - like the New Age Movement. The Charismatic Movement is one of those things that the Church finds to be an acceptable option, for some who choose it; but not for everyone. It emphasizes some spiritual things that the Church has always emphasized, but many Catholics have gotten away from since around 1960. The supernatural does exist. God does heal. Good and evil spirits do exist, and can impact us.

Being “slain in the Spirit” certainly sounds unAmerican, or medieval. But it echoes some basic Catholic spirituality, of dying to self, taking up one’s cross, etc. How does “Born Again” sound? The Charismatic Movement does touch on some very old, good stuff. Unfortunately imperfect people, including me, sometimes forget the Spirit will work on individuals differently. And not on our command! I am not sure which is worse: questionable services like you described; or the usual Confirmation services, where no one expects the Spirit to do anything, where the congregation celebrates their own goodness, where teens are applauded for being wonderful, and most will now stop going to Mass.

It’s unfair to expect perfection in the Charismatic Movement, when we put up with gross imperfections in every other kind of Church ministry. I have seen some bad fruit - some people veer off into New Age spirituality, or fundamentalism, or anti-Catholic-authority, or have control issues. But I have also seen very good fruit: building community, devotion to the Blessed Sacrament, and many other things.

My suggestion is, if interested, learn more about this. It may or may not be for you. Thank God for your faithfulness as a Catholic in any event.
 
From post 1.
guiltycatholic said:
Someone help me, please! I went to a meeting at my Church tonight called the Upper Room - it’s like a continuation for those who attended a Life in the Spirit seminar recently.

skip due to the limited amount of characters in a post.

So, long story short, I’m thinking I did it wrong. I’m thinking there was some kind of opposite effect for me, where everyone else is getting gifts of the Spirit and I’m getting… deadly sins? I feel awful about the whole experience. I guess my question is, should I try again or wait because I’m obviously not ready? And if I ever go back, what am I supposed to do differently?
Click to expand...
At first glance, my observation is that the particular group has exaggerated "resting in the Spirit, beyond common sense. This can happen. Often, personal pride is involved.

First. You did nothing wrong. You came to pray. You were eager to be prayed over. Resting in the Spirit is not a form of prayer. It is not something everyone needs to do. It does not signify personal holiness. It does not necessarily indicate that a person is getting the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

On the other hand, when resting in the Spirit is free of pressure, it can be a very good experience. It can help one in their own prayer life. There are charismatic CAF members who can give proper information.

Please see post 4 as a start.

Second. While your anger was dramatic, it is understandable as a reaction to total disappointment. You came with the pure intention to pray, be prayed over, and perhaps to learn “charismatic praying.” Instead, you landed in the midst of something which was, understandably, strange and apparently exaggerated.

Third. I hope you continue to believe in the Catholic Charismatic Renewal. Normally, “being prayed over” simply means that someone stands with you and prays to the Holy Spirit for you and your needs. You can tell the person your needs or not tell the person. Sometimes, there are huge needs like being healed of a sickness or having a child come back to Catholicism. Sometimes, the person who is praying over you may talk to you about your needs. In a sense, you and the person praying over you are like a team petitioning God. There are no rules about standing, laying on the floor, or anything else. Sometimes, people will cry after being prayed over. Sometimes, that is a relief that our needs are in God’s hands. Sometimes there are tears of joy at the thought of God answering prayers. Sometimes, it is so good to know that another person is with us in our distress.

The Catholic Charismatic Renewal began as a way of bringing ordinary people into a deeper relationship with God through the means of the Catholic Church and the Gifts of the Holy Spirit taught by St. Paul

Ordinary people can receive the Holy Spirit Gift of Praying in Tongues. I am wondering, if there was group praying in Tongues. Note: praying in Tongues is not something a person has to have. In our charismatic prayer group, there was a member who only prayed in English when all of us were praising God as a group. When I was standing next to her, I would praise God in both Tongues and English.

I do suggest learning about the common gift of praying in Tongues. In my personal experience, it was handy when I was not sure what I should be praying for. For example. Years ago, when I brought Holy Communion to people in the hospital, I would say a fast prayer in Tongues basically asking for inspiration as to what I should say to the patient. Having two little kids gives you plenty of reasons to say a short prayer in Tongues as you clean up a mess. Praying in Tongues comes in handy at the end of a very long day because you can let your mind rest. A quick prayer in Tongues is a lot better than road rage.

In answer to your two last questions. Should I try again or wait because I’m obviously not ready? And if I ever go back, what am I supposed to do differently?

All of us are ready to seek the Holy Spirit gift of praying in Tongues. That is why that gift is known as a common gift. It is very important to learn what praying in Tongues is and what it is not. Note: There is actually another separate Holy Spirit gift which employs Tongues. This gift is part of the classical list given by St. Paul. Preparation for this gift requires mature spirituality, study, prayer and discernment.

As going back, that depends on the group’s agenda for a meeting. You may want to attend another prayer group which is more understanding of the needs of someone who is new.

This book has necessary basic information. It was on line, but now I cannot find it. This new lap top has done weird things with my favorites list.

A Key to Charismatic Renewal in the Catholic Church by Msgr. Vincent M. Walsh. ISBN 0-87029-33-9. Published by Key of David Publications. In my very old book, the phone number is 215-896-1970

Please feel free to ask questions.
 
I was active in the Charismatic movement in N.Y. for about 20 yrs. & I still attend prayer groups here in Florida. I played guitar for them most of the time.

The 1st time I was “slain in the Spirit” was a surprise. I never thought I would fall. The man praying over me never touched my head, he just had his hand over it & I just felt like I was being gently pushed by an invisible force. Someone caught me & placed me down. He told me to pray…I did, while lying on the floor & had no feelings, afterwards, other than awe!
 
guiltycatholic said:
Someone help me, please! I went to a meeting at my Church tonight called the Upper Room - it’s like a continuation for those who attended a Life in the Spirit seminar recently. I was unable to attend the seminar, but some people made it sound like it was ok for me to go to the Upper Room meeting anyway.
I’m a 27 year old mom of two little kids, been Catholic all my life. Never really encountered the charismatic movement at all. My parents are the type who roll their eyes and do the air quotes whenever they talk about the charismatic movement. I’m not sure how to feel because I totally believe in it, but on the other hand, I’m totally uncomfortable with it and I don’t really understand it. I’m your stereotypical practicing Catholic. I’m good at standing when I’m supposed to stand, kneeling when I’m supposed to kneel, and praying like I’m supposed to pray. I feel comfortable with spontaneous prayer as well, but not as much in front of people because I feel a little like I’m calling attention to myself when I do that. Based on my personality alone, I know surrender isn’t my strong suit. II’m usually pretty rigid and untrusting in general, and I prefer following rules.
So I went to this meeting tonight and I was really eager to be prayed over. I know I want and need the Holy Spirit in my life more. But I had some mixed results. I expected either NOTHING or SOMETHING. What I got was somewhere in between.
I was one of the first to go up and be prayed over tonight, so I didn’t realize I was “supposed” to fall down, slain in the spirit, until the priest said there were catchers at each station. I had to laugh. I just thought I was there to pray, and maybe if God wanted to knock me down, He would. I feel open to falling out if HE’S the one doing it - not if I’M the one doing it. But I didn’t feel knocked down at all. I did feel off balance and light as a feather. I felt like I was swaying back and forth and sort of what I can only describe as an urge to just rest backward, where the “catcher” was standing. Those praying over me kept encouraging me and praying for me to just let go and surrender to it, and in the spirit of “going with it” I let myself fall slightly backwards. But I didn’t want to fall, so I caught myself. The priest told me not to catch myself, which is hard as I’m not in the habit of just falling, like, ever.
They prayed some more and it was like they REALLY wanted me to fall down and expected it. A little while later I again “went with” the feeling to rest, and fell back a little more, and they let me sit on the ground for a while. Maybe this was just the power of suggestion and I’m a faker? I really couldn’t tell. I didn’t “feel” anything, which I thought I was supposed to. I thought being “slain in the Spirit” means you feel overwhelming peace and joy, or something. I just felt awkward, honestly. Sitting there was unpleasant and boring at best.
So I got up after trying to pray awhile and suddenly I WAS overcome. With anger. All I could feel was an anger unlike I usually ever feel - almost a rage. I couldn’t even force myself to sing along to any of the praise songs being played. It wasn’t anger over anything in particular, just a general angry feeling. I noticed I kept crossing my arms and legs and hunching over, as if my body was physically shutting out everything around it. I’d try to relax and open up, but the next time I paid attention to myself, I was a pretzel again. All I could do was cry, and I had a huge headache. I wanted nothing more than to leave that building immediately, and I was so relieved when the priest said it was over and we could go.
So, long story short, I’m thinking I did it wrong. I’m thinking there was some kind of opposite effect for me, where everyone else is getting gifts of the Spirit and I’m getting… deadly sins? I feel awful about the whole experience. I guess my question is, should I try again or wait because I’m obviously not ready? And if I ever go back, what am I supposed to do differently?
Click to expand...
A sweet and pious elderly friend of mine attended one of these prayer services with the “catchers”.When she was prayed over she said she really felt nothing but as everyone else was dropping like ninepins she did not want to feel left out so she just fell down.

I think one of the original charismatics was a woman named Agnes OzmanWhen she was prayed over by her prayer group it was said she fell on her face and began speaking Chinese! Officially that is said to be the beginning of the movement (1901) but it was not common in the Catholic church until the 60s.
 
Guilty Catholic,
I am happy that you came to prayed over with an open spirit for what ever your needs may have been. The Catholic Church came into being on the Day of Pentecost. We are called to pray for one another.
What the prayer group did correctly was provide 2 catchers to guide any person to the floor who may after being prayed over succumb to the Spirit and end up resting on the floor. It should definitely not have felt forced.

The healing Mass at a local parish is often a first introduction for many people the Charismatic Renewal. I have been in a position where I have been able to explain what is happening as people are being prayed over after the end of Mass in a relaxed manner that relieved any anxieties.

It is unfortunate that you did not have anybody with you to explain what was happening. You said that you were the first in line. That shows an eagerness for prayer and understandably that increased both your anxiety and anger afterward when you didn’t understand what was happening or what to expect.

Please do not give up on the Charismatic Renewal. As Granny as already mentioned, this is a renewal of the Holy Spirit at work within the midst of the Catholic Church. The outward signs are less important than the transforming changes that take place within the individual. Whether or not we manifest any charisms, we are all called to grow spiritually and to follow the path that God has set out for each of us.
 
I have been observing this scene for well over 40 years but am not qualified to give more than my own semi-baked opinion.

By no means replacing, merely adding to what others have said:

Your original instinct is very good - a genuine thing will have bucket loads of decency and order in it.

It will be oriented essentially to the core objectives of the Church - interceding for the needy, for evangelisation - listening to Scripture.

There is a genuine Charismatic movement somewhere and soon the charismatic gifts will be needed.

Join me, only if you think appropriate, in praying that the folks at your church swing ever closer to this. These however are only my opinions.
 
Dear guiltycatholic, I don’t think you did anything wrong. Perhaps the charismatic way is not for you. That’s fine. I am personally skeptical about such things because of my own experience. I went to a healing Mass where a well-known healing priest actually kind of pushed me with his finger. When I didn’t do the falling thing like some others were doing he actually pushed me again harder. I still didn’t fall down. I wasn’t impressed.
On the other hand, I have gone to other charismatic healing masses twice with another healing priest who spoke words about you while he was praying over you. What he said was so specific to my background that it kind of blew me away, like how could he know that?
 
Sunbreak said:
Dear guiltycatholic, I don’t think you did anything wrong. Perhaps the charismatic way is not for you. That’s fine. I am personally skeptical about such things because of my own experience. I went to a healing Mass where a well-known healing priest actually kind of pushed me with his finger. When I didn’t do the falling thing like some others were doing he actually pushed me again harder. I still didn’t fall down. I wasn’t impressed.
On the other hand, I have gone to other charismatic healing masses twice with another healing priest who spoke words about you while he was praying over you. What he said was so specific to my background that it kind of blew me away, like how could he know that?
Click to expand...
The second priest exhibited the charism known as a “word of knowledge.”
 
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