Limbo

[CatholicParadox]

I’ve been having a rather interesting problem regarding sin and confession. I’ll commit some sin, such as masturbation, at the beginning of the week, and then be completely sorry for it, and recognize it as a mortal sin, and have the intention to go to confession the next weekend. But how should I act/think during the week? I desire to confess the sin right now, but I have a whole week to have it on my conscience.

Should I be sad and try to feel remorse all week? Should I just put it in the back of my head until I have the opportunity for confession? Would it be wrong to be cheerful and act like it never happened? I don’t want to let it spoil my whole week, but I don’t want to downplay it and act as if I’m not sorry. How should I be reacting to this limbo during the week?

 

[EasterJoy]

I’ve been having a rather interesting problem regarding sin and confession. I’ll commit some sin, such as masturbation, at the beginning of the week, and then be completely sorry for it, and recognize it as a mortal sin, and have the intention to go to confession the next weekend. But how should I act/think during the week? I desire to confess the sin right now, but I have a whole week to have it on my conscience.

Should I be sad and try to feel remorse all week? Should I just put it in the back of my head until I have the opportunity for confession? Would it be wrong to be cheerful and act like it never happened? I don’t want to let it spoil my whole week, but I don’t want to downplay it and act as if I’m not sorry. How should I be reacting to this limbo during the week?

If you have a mortal sin or sins that you commit over and over, you may have fallen into a habit that mitigates your culpability to some extent. Having said that, merely confessing the act may not realistically be sufficient to overcome that habit, either. I’d suggest you worry less about whether you “ought” to be beating yourself up about it. Instead, address how you’re going to defeat mortal sins that have repeatedly tempted you, because feeling guilty and beating yourself up are not doing the trick.

Only the devil wants you to suffer. God wants you to conquer the sin; the lesser suffering that takes, the better. (There is a reason that Our Lord is called the Great Physician!) You might want to make an appointment with your confessor (also called a physician of the soul, and for good reason) so that you’ll have enough time to really talk this over without holding up the confessional line on Saturday. Do not worry that he will think less of you for having some sin or other that you struggle with. If anything, he will be pleased that you are at least staying in the ring and fighting it!

God bless you, and may you have victory over every sin!

 

[Tomek]

Should I be sad and try to feel remorse all week? Should I just put it in the back of my head until I have the opportunity for confession? Would it be wrong to be cheerful and act like it never happened? I don’t want to let it spoil my whole week, but I don’t want to downplay it and act as if I’m not sorry. How should I be reacting to this limbo during the week?

I think more people are addicted to masturbation and pornography than any substance of abuse. Now, I’m not saying you’re addicted, but understanding the addiction cycle can help answer your question.

Basically people who are addicts have deep psychological issues, usually they suffer from depression, anxiety, and a sense of inferiority. The addictant, whether it’s alcohol, drugs, or sex, helps relieve their depression and anxiety. Just as an aside, basically anything that relieves anxiety and depression, can serve as an addictant. Now one aspect of the cycle of addiction, is that when the addict falls (e.g. gets drunks, views pornography, etc) they feel guilt. Ironically, the guilt feeds into their depression, anxiety, and sense of inferiority, which ultimately causes them to seek relief from the addictant. See the cycle?

So to answer your question, the best, and healthiest thing to do, is to recognize that you committed a sin. BUT DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP OVER IT. Recognize the fault, and then start taking actions that will liberate you. Always keep the intention to free yourself from the sin completely, and strive to not do it as long as you can. If you fall, tell God your sorry, get back up, and keep trying… and again… never dwell too much on the guilt because it will only make things worse.

 

[nodito]

If you really are in mortal sin (and do bear in mind that habit can reduce culpability, as others have pointed out), then you should focus your energy on getting to confession as soon as possible. Mortal sin separates us from God, completely cuts off grace in our soul. If you think you’re in mortal sin, call the rectory at the next reasonable hour and request that a priest meet with you to hear your confession after school or before work. Or go to a daily Mass and ask if the priest will hear your confession immedietly before or after. Life is fleeting. You never know the day or the hour in which the Master will come.

 

[CatholicParadox]

Hey, thanks for the responses guys. Much of this is what I already thought, but it’s good to hear it confirmed. I suppose you could say I’m addicted to some extent, going by Tomek’s description there. I don’t want to automatically assume I’m not culpable (though to some extent this may be true.)

I am also guilty of the sin of presumption I think. Before I commit the sin, I’ll make sure that I’ll be able to go to confession on Saturday, and I know it’s wrong but at that moment it seems far away or insignificant. I think part of my problem is that I have faith in my brain, but not in my heart. With my logical brain, I know for a fact that it’s wrong, I believe all the church teaches, etc. But when it comes to believing with my heart - feeling like it’s real, or recognizing the full reality, I’m quite lacking.