little white lies

[arewethereyet]

I’m looking for your opinions on something.
Say there is a person in your life who is very sensitive and gets their feelings hurt very easily.
Should you spare them tears and heartache by not being honest with them about how they make you feel?..
Or should you be honest with them and upset them?
I have a family member who I feel I just can’t talk to about how I feel without them feeling crushed.
I appreciate your (name removed by moderator)ut.
And is this considered a sin when I tell them everything is fine so they won’t be so hurt?
I’d rather not upset them so.
Thanks…
Karen

 

[mariam1976]

if it is your spouse that you are talking about, i would say be honest but gentle with the truth. You have to be honest otherwise when the truth comes out, it will erode trust which always spells the end of the relationship.
Remember - If you cant trust them in small things, how can you trust them in big ones…
again - if the question is “honey do i look good in this outfit” unless they look like a total fool, say yes with a bright smile.

for everyone else, i think the advice of a number of people on this forum was that if it does not harm anyone and will only cause hurt to the other person, that truth is better left untold.

 

[arewethereyet]

if it is your spouse that you are talking about, i would say be honest but gentle with the truth. You have to be honest otherwise when the truth comes out, it will erode trust which always spells the end of the relationship.
Remember - If you cant trust them in small things, how can you trust them in big ones…
again - if the question is “honey do i look good in this outfit” unless they look like a total fool, say yes with a bright smile.

for everyone else, i think the advice of a number of people on this forum was that if it does not harm anyone and will only cause hurt to the other person, that truth is better left untold.

Thank you for your reply!
It is my mother and she would be hurt and I don’t want to do that. Maybe I will keep my feelings to myself. Or with all of you where I can let it all out. I do spend an awful lot of time talking to God about this situation. It feels good to get it out.
Karen

 

[Damascus]

Thank you for your reply!
It is my mother and she would be hurt and I don’t want to do that. Maybe I will keep my feelings to myself. Or with all of you where I can let it all out. I do spend an awful lot of time talking to God about this situation. It feels good to get it out.
Karen

Let it out here. If its something she should know to avoid danger or death that is another ball game. Even in that case it might be better coming from someone else depending on what it is IMHO. I have an open relationship with my mother where I can tell her like it is and she does not shut me out no matter how harsh I am. But, I know that is not the “norm” so be careful.

 

[arewethereyet]

Let it out here. If its something she should know to avoid danger or death that is another ball game. Even in that case it might be better coming from someone else depending on what it is IMHO. I have an open relationship with my mother where I can tell her like it is and she does not shut me out no matter how harsh I am. But, I know that is not the “norm” so be careful.

Thanks for your reply, friend!
That’s nice that you can be so open with your mother.
I will be careful.
God bless…
Karen