Living together but not having sex

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When I think back on starting grade 12, I had a boyfriend. I was fortunate to get a locker that was bigger and required 2 people sign up for it. I got a girlfriend to share the locker, because I thought, what happens if boyfriend and I break up, he gets another girlfriend, and I’m stuck sharing this locker with him the rest of the year. I’m stuck watching this romantic relationship play out in front of me.

This was just a locker. How about an apartment? No way. You don’t have to be a Catholic to think this is a bad idea.
 
You sure are working hard in this thread to excuse things that the Church views as wrong. Do you think you know better?
 
Anicette said:
Sorry, but when I see faithfull Catholic friends who live with their boyfriend or girlfriend, or who go to sleep to each other house even if they live in the same city, I assume that they have sex. And I am almsot sure that I am correct at least 90% or the time.
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This just seems really odd to me. I have many friends who are couples. Some are married, some aren’t. Do you know I never find myself considering if they are having sex? Am I the one who isn’t normal? I may wonder if they are enjoying their vacation, or wondering how the new furniture they just told me they bought looks in their new place. I may wonder all kinds of things about these couples I know, but I don’t wonder about if they are having sex, or not. And now that I am thinking about it because of this post, I realize I have no idea what they do and it is none of my business and who cares, anyway.

I just wanted to post this because I think there is too much interest in the deepest, most intimate parts of other peoples’ lives. Perhaps the focus should be on our own lives, instead.
 
In rare circumstances bishops allow it? What the heck are people talking about? I think every Catholic wedding I’ve been to in the last 20 years people have cohabitated!
 
And so what?

It is the reality of the situation nowdays, but it is not how the world live and act that create what is moral or the best exemple to follow.

Many people don’t really live their marriage in a catholic way, how should it serve as an exemple?
 
Maybe where @pnwcatholic lives, all these couples living in sin would be considered to be common-law spouses anyway.
 
Living in sin? I don’t know about common law laws but we are all in agreement premarital sex is wrong. I dont assume everyone is having sex. And the poster insists they are not.
Not a lot of charity here.
 
And there has been more than enough evidence given, cited from reliable Church sources, stating that even if the couple is not having sex, cohabitation is still a big no. Especially due to the sin of scandal. It’s not that there is a lack of charity, it’s that there is a lack of knowledge and not wanting to accept it when it is plainly given.
 
Ironically, I think faithful Catholics are much more likely to think about it because we are trained to be in constant battle mode against sexual sin and even the appearance of sexual sin. You’re probably right that most people aren’t giving a random person’s sex life a second thought. Some married couples rarely or never have sex for various reasons. While we seem to talk about sex endlessly, it’s actually a very small part of most people’s lives in terms of the long list of things we do each day…

Not that I think cohabitation is a good idea for unmarried couples.
 
What is people’s opinion of girlfriend and boyfriend living in a parents house (with other family members) in separate rooms to save money for their marriage. The Cost of living can be prohibitive these days. I must admit I did this for a year or so and did not fornicate and did not find it anymore an occasion of sin than if I were to meet her alone elsewhere. Not sure why this would be sinful as no sin occurred?!
 
I think that it is different because you were basically chaperoned the whole time by her parents.
 
SaintJude said:
What is people’s opinion of girlfriend and boyfriend living in a parents house (with other family members) in separate rooms to save money for their marriage. The Cost of living can be prohibitive these days. I must admit I did this for a year or so and did not fornicate and did not find it anymore an occasion of sin than if I were to meet her alone elsewhere. Not sure why this would be sinful as no sin occurred?!
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This actually sounds like really good marriage prep. I think some cultures have some form of this as a trial marriage.
 
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PennyinCanada said:
Who is the person who is going to be scandalized? When you look around and see that the whole world is doing scandalous behavior, this is when you and I can shine even brighter. Honor God in your dating. There’s no regrets there. Be that light. Show others what love really looks like. Don’t fall for the counterfeits.
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So true, we forget that we preach by our actions. We need to be different, the world needs people that are not afraid or ashamed to be chaste. We should be testimonies of our faith.
 
@midge13, they don’t actually have to gossip. They can witness it and be lead to think it is okay.
 
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Do you actually think a couple would tell someone, other than A priest if they did do anything, they weren’t suppose to be doing? What would they witness, that would be wrong? They would have to assume. My gosh, have a little faith in people.
 
Wow, you must not know many people that live together. Sometimes, one does not need to assume, people like to talk. And some of them do not go to confession, nor do they think what they are doing is wrong.
 
Right they do like to talk. I tend not to ask many questions, to folks I don’t know very well, even to folks I do know. So, I don’t have a need to know. I don’t keep tabs on who goes to confession and who doesn’t, I can’t argue that. If they are Catholic and don’t know, sex before marriage is wrong, something is wrong with either the teaching they received, or they didn’t care about the teaching. Don’t kid yourself that most people are ignorant, and don’t know, they know, exactly what they’re doing.
 
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