Loneliness of a 16 years old boy

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Oetter4

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So yeah, I am a 16, soon 17 years old boy who is lonely. The loneliness is killing me slowly but surely, even though I really try to find some friends. I pray everyday (two times and go to church every Sunday) to God so he can help me get some friends to get off the loneliness. I really hope you guys can pray for me and maybe give me som tips how I can escape the loneliness.
 
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Are there any clubs or groups at school that interest you, or that you can lend your skills to? You can make friends while being on the yearbook staff, or stage crew, or play a sport. If you are not athletically inclined, some schools still need people in pep club, or other organizations.

Volunteer somewhere. Your church may have a soup kitchen, food pantry, or garden maintenance group.

Are you a member of your parish’s youth group?

In order to have friends, you need to act like a friend, meaning, you can’t wait for people to invite you to do things, you have to engage them. Invite one or two people over for pizza and a movie or gaming.

You are at a tough age, I remember it, and I saw my kids go through it. And I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but this will pass too. If you go away to college or even commute, you will meet a whole new group of people with no past expectations of how they think you are or pigeon hole you into this or that personality.
 
I really appreciate it! My names I Petter, and God bless you my friend!
 
it’s time to man up, bro. there are people who are born with physical disabilities and they’ll never find romantic love. consider yourself lucky.
 
I really hope that College will be something to me.
I live in Norway by they way, in a small town. And in my town, we do not have any activities for youth except the local hockey club. My parish is also kind of small. I do not know if they have a youth club but I will try to do some research about it
 
Hey, I’m a 17 year old boy so I understand where you are coming from, but the best thing to do is engage with others, I know that can be hard, but it almost always pays off, join clubs at school, or see what organizations you can join at your parish. And pray always!
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
it’s time to man up, bro. there are people who are born with physical disabilities and they’ll never find romantic love. consider yourself lucky.
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Aw don’t say that. Telling someone in pain not to be in pain because somebody out there has it worse is like telling someone not to be happy, because someone out there has it better.
 
That’s the problem mate. My school is small, so we do not have any kind of activities or clubs for youths
 
Ah I see, well in that case I’d simply try to socialize as much as possible, even a quick conversation here or there, you’d be surprised how quickly you can bond with others, especially at our young age
 
As you seek to be part of something larger than yourself, your loneliness will begin to diminish. Your life goals will bring you into contact with others with similar interests in ways that builds lasting friendships. Enjoy this time in your life. It will never come again.
 
Oetter4 I’m sorry you’re going through this. You’ve been given some wonderful advice. Now you said you live in a small town where there isn’t much for the youth - what about service opportunities? College is another opportunity on your horizon.

Offer this up to God and ask Him for the graces you need to get through it. You have your entire life ahead of you, there’s no reason to expect this to last. May the dear Lord bless and keep you!
 
not really, I’m telling him to be grateful, which leads to happiness.
 
So you live in a small town, did you recently move there? If not, did some of your long time friends move away?
 
It is difficult in small towns to meet people and form friendships, instead focus on school and your studies, also focus on yourself, you more comfortable you are with you the more likely you are to meet people that have the same interests and morals as you.
 
God does a provide. When I was younger I began a novena to St John Bosco, and I never looked back. He is a powerful saint.

But I made friends in my younger years, but I didn’t like them. I was picky and found it hard to make friends with who I thought I wanted to be friends. I’d go to parties, hang out with the rugby team, etc… but in the end I found it was sort of futile and and I didn’t see any point in spending time with those ‘just for the sake of having the appearance of friends’. It left me empty, even though I did make a good few close friends out of the lot, and I tried my best to be a friend to all and love them regardless of how wrongly I was often treated.

The one thing to pray for is for one, solid, close, friend. In the end, it doesn’t matter who they are - its the friendship and bond you develop that does. A relationship that builds each other up, not one of cheques and balances and scales and weights. Loneliness is an affliction, beyond many.

Never lose the closeness of God nor your identity as a uniquely crafted person with a plan. Be helpful to classmates, and get involved in clubs and sports, or parish work and volunteering. Whatever your talents may be, use them and exhibit them.

The hardest thing to comprehend is that while it seems like I’m alone, and I might very well be, it seldom ever lasts. We human beings are naturally attracted toward companionship, in fact, we need it. Someone needs it just as bloody well much as you do, and you will find them and they will find you. Keep praying. All suffering has an end, and its end is usually a lesson. What you struggle with now will serve you when you’re older, and this might be God’s test for you in learning important abilities to use when you become an adult.

You will find a friend. I am praying for you. We are all praying for you, and most importantly, you should pray for you. God always provides.
 
Loneliness is a difficult thing at your age, but many teens experience this. When you get older it should be easier. Maybe you can volunteer for things at your church or community to have some contact with people. You can also volunteer to do things for people you may know who are much older than you and then at least you would be doing something positive and it would give you some positive contact with people. Or maybe if there is an animal shelter in your town you can volunteer to help with the animals. I was very shy as a teen and had some friends but not that many. So when I was feeling down I used to write poetry. That sort of helped me get through my feelings at the time. Maybe you can find some activity that would do the same for you.
 
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It’s easy to make friends! Just say hello to everyone you meet, make small talk, and just chat it up with everyone and anyone! You’ll have great fun doing this and you will make many friends this way! 😊
 
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