T
TammiFlandres
Guest
In a nutshell; my husband and I are currently not living togeather so that we can achieve our educational dreams. He will be finishing soon and I am sad that he isn’t jumping at the chance move to where I am.
He has been working on his doctorate for years and I was in a job that didn’t fufill me. When I was fired, I was allowed to explore educational options I never was able to before. I wanted to get my degree before we had children because I know it would be near impossible for me in the other order. Every year he promised to graduate “soon” but soon never came so we decided I needed to return to finish my degree while he was finishing.
I found an amazing program and I feel that I will be able to serve the Lord in my current career path but it is a very rare program / degree and the school was out of state. After lots of discussion, we decided that although it would be hard - it wasn’t too long for us to be apart. I assumed that once he graduated, he would be with me but assumed that my two years away wasn’t too long to be apart. He officially will finish this June and wants to take up post graduate work though the work isn’t his dream or calling; just a paycheck.
It tears me up that he is talking about taking a job to settle us financially back east while I go another year without him here. I am getting very lonely and sad without him and it hurts me to think he isn’t rushing to be with me, his wife. I am afraid to ask him to move here because I fear he will resent me for unfairly denying him a job he wants to take. I don’t feel like I am in his career decisions but I always open him to mine.
I don’t want to give up what is fufilling me career wise but I am losing precious time marriage wise. I said that I would quit in a heart beat to be with him but he was angry because we allready have sunk in alot of money for me to go to school. I want this degree so that I can beam with pride to my future children as well as have something to fall back on if he is unable to work.
What should I do?
He has been working on his doctorate for years and I was in a job that didn’t fufill me. When I was fired, I was allowed to explore educational options I never was able to before. I wanted to get my degree before we had children because I know it would be near impossible for me in the other order. Every year he promised to graduate “soon” but soon never came so we decided I needed to return to finish my degree while he was finishing.
I found an amazing program and I feel that I will be able to serve the Lord in my current career path but it is a very rare program / degree and the school was out of state. After lots of discussion, we decided that although it would be hard - it wasn’t too long for us to be apart. I assumed that once he graduated, he would be with me but assumed that my two years away wasn’t too long to be apart. He officially will finish this June and wants to take up post graduate work though the work isn’t his dream or calling; just a paycheck.
It tears me up that he is talking about taking a job to settle us financially back east while I go another year without him here. I am getting very lonely and sad without him and it hurts me to think he isn’t rushing to be with me, his wife. I am afraid to ask him to move here because I fear he will resent me for unfairly denying him a job he wants to take. I don’t feel like I am in his career decisions but I always open him to mine.
I don’t want to give up what is fufilling me career wise but I am losing precious time marriage wise. I said that I would quit in a heart beat to be with him but he was angry because we allready have sunk in alot of money for me to go to school. I want this degree so that I can beam with pride to my future children as well as have something to fall back on if he is unable to work.
What should I do?
