During my adolescence I used to go to confession only twice a year and recieve Communion 4-5 times. It was because I didn’t understood how important it is to recieve our Lord and especially because going to confession was a really difficult thing for me to do. However, about 3 years ago, I began to experience a real longing for the Eucharist, at each Mass I would almost cry because I couldn’t go to Communion, and every Sunday I would make a promise to myself that next week I will make peace with God and join the others. Unfortunately, I kept delaying making this step, and with these weak resolutions I was getting nowhere, despite my strong desire to be closer to God.
So, about a year ago, out of the blue, God gave me the power to go to confession fearleesly. For a moment, I had no difficulty, no pain, no anxiety…and now I can say that I recieve the Sacrements more regulary, even if the grace of courage that I had back then comes rarely, I still experience a lot of fear, but it’s better that before. With this step ahead in my spiritual life, my longing for the Eucharist diminished, in the sense that I still want to go to Communion, but it is not anymore that strong pull to go. Now it’s my turn to make an effort. But I’m still very emotional when I think that Jesus was calling me to recieve Him and that He helped me in every way possible to make this happend.
