Looking for a booklet to explain Mass to wedding guests

[The_Buggiest]

Hello, everyone!

I wasn’t sure which forum to post this in, but I thought Apologetics might be appropriate. I am getting married next weekend. My fiance and I are both Catholic and will be wed in a nuptial Mass. However, most of our guests (including all of his family) are not Catholic. I would love for our wedding to be an opportunity for evangelism. Not necessarily in a “CATHOLICISM IS CORRECT, AND WE WILL NOT LEAVE UNTIL YOU BELIEVE THAT” kind of way, but rather in a “so, you are probably really lost because most churches don’t worship like we do. Here’s a really good explanation of all the parts of the Mass, oh and hey, this is where in Scripture all of this comes from.”

I just thought it would be really interesting, especially for some of our guests who are very well-versed in Scripture, but don’t know a thing about the Catholic Church. They might be really astonished to know how biblically based the Mass really is, and it might help them appreciate the beauty rather than just balk at the strangeness.

Does anybody have any recommendations for a pamphlet or booklet that I could buy in bulk and pass out with our wedding programs?

I see this in Catholic Answers’ store - shop.catholic.com/pamphlets/the-institution-of-the-mass-pack-of-50-tracts-1.html. Has anybody read it? Do you know if it fits the bill?

Thanks, all, and God bless!

 

[pianistclare]

No, I have not read it, but seriously…just let them enjoy the day and form their own opinions. I’ve played for hundreds of Nuptial Masses…the priests generally do a good job of giving kind instructions along the way.
**Congratulations, may your marriage be greatly blessed. **

 

[z_0101]

Hard to recommend the material you linked to as it really doesn’t show the contents… there is this, catholic.com/tracts/the-institution-of-the-mass however, you would have to print your copies… it may be the same material… I don’t know

A Biblical Walk Through the Mass: Understanding What We Say and Do in the Liturgy

May be more than you are willing to spend and it’s more than just a little sound-bite; however, our parish went thru a whole study of the Mass based on this material.

Some excerpts:
(click on the “Look Inside” link on the Amazon site to view a few pages)
amazon.com/Biblical-Walk-Through-Mass-Book/dp/1935940007

youtube.com/watch?v=YmzCbNgF6DM

(( if you want the whole study series for yourself or to recommend to your parish:ascensionpress.com/t/category/study-programs/the-mass/biblical-walk-through-the-mass ))

 

[The_Buggiest]

Not a bad idea, pianistclare, and something I’m very seriously considering. I know I might be suffering from “brideitis” and trying to do way too much that doesn’t need to be done.

I guess my concern is mostly for his parents. His stepdad is an atheist and outspoken critic of religion in general. He makes a lot of jokes about the Catholic Church. His mom is more agnostic and would like, I think, to go to church, but she doesn’t think she can “do Catholic.” I’ve been trying to think of a way to show them how much the Mass means to us and why we want to be married in the church (his stepdad keeps offering us money to cancel the wedding and go to Vegas) and why we want to be married in a Mass (we’ve also heard lots of grumblings about how long it’s going to be).

z_0101, that looks awesome! Unfortunately, we’ll have about 180 guests, so you’re right, it’s a little outside our budget. Probably also more information than I want to throw at people. I don’t want to try to convert them, only try to help them follow along.

 

[pianistclare]

Not a bad idea, pianistclare, and something I’m very seriously considering. I know I might be suffering from “brideitis” and trying to do way too much that doesn’t need to be done.

I guess my concern is mostly for his parents. His stepdad is an atheist and outspoken critic of religion in general. He makes a lot of jokes about the Catholic Church. His mom is more agnostic and would like, I think, to go to church, but she doesn’t think she can “do Catholic.” I’ve been trying to think of a way to show them how much the Mass means to us and why we want to be married in the church (his stepdad keeps offering us money to cancel the wedding and go to Vegas) and why we want to be married in a Mass (we’ve also heard lots of grumblings about how long it’s going to be).

z_0101, that looks awesome! Unfortunately, we’ll have about 180 guests, so you’re right, it’s a little outside our budget. Probably also more information than I want to throw at people. I don’t want to try to convert them, only try to help them follow along.

If dad is atheist, he’ll appreciate not being preached to by his inlaws.

 

[The_Buggiest]

I’m really not trying to preach. I just ache for everyone to know what’s going on. I have this fear that they’ll sit there staring blankly and think “I hate Catholic weddings, they’re long and they never make sense.” I love the Mass so much.

 

[pianistclare]

I’m really not trying to preach. I just ache for everyone to know what’s going on. I have this fear that they’ll sit there staring blankly and think “I hate Catholic weddings, they’re long and they never make sense.” I love the Mass so much.

They should be there because they love you and are happy for you.
Some will never “get it”. Some will be pleasantly surprised to see that we’re not lunatics.
Be at peace.
Have a beautiful day.
I’m so happy for you. God bless you.

 

[coachdennis]

They should be there because they love you and are happy for you.
Some will never “get it”. Some will be pleasantly surprised to see that we’re not lunatics.
Be at peace.
Have a beautiful day.
I’m so happy for you. God bless you.

I agree and from your description of your future step-father-in-law he sounds like a first class jerk and the kind of man most people dread sitting next to at Thanksgiving!

I hope for your marriage he lives far away from you and that you and your spouse have set up strong boundaries.

I’m dead serious. If he has no respect for your beliefs now, don’t think it will improve after you are married

 

[z_0101]

If dad is atheist, he’ll appreciate not being preached to by his inlaws.

Very good point

I’m really not trying to preach. I just ache for everyone to know what’s going on. I have this fear that they’ll sit there staring blankly and think “I hate Catholic weddings, they’re long and they never make sense.” I love the Mass so much.

A good priest can help here by giving a very short introduction to the two sacraments. Most likely not his first time dealing with the issue and of course, he’ll most likely provide the usual “please stand/sit” prompts

Are you looking for something along the lines of the missalette such as this example:
ourladyofmountcarmelparish.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/edited_OLMC-Wedding-Template.pdf

Then there is this is a commercial site (amongst many!) dealing specifically with Catholic weddings. I’ve read thru a good part of it just now (not in depth ) and there are some really good suggestions about how to arrange the ceremony. This is the link specifically to the “wedding program” section: [Catholic Wedding Help: Creating a Catholic wedding program participation](Catholic Wedding Help: Creating a Catholic wedding program participation)

From the same site: catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/order-wedding-with-mass.htm
Just a little different bit of information
Hopefully this will help.

I forgot in my last post, but please accept my Congratulations and my prayer for a long, happy, and fruitful marriage!

 

[BiffRuffle]

When I got married, my wife was not Catholic, and the vast majority of her family were not (and are still not) Catholic. However, priests are used to this - most Catholics only go to church for weddings and funerals anyway, so the priests are used to explaining everything. The priest that did our wedding is a teacher as well (he teaches moral theology at a nearby seminary) so his explanations were fantastic. I would trust your priest to explain what needs to be explained. Also, if you have a program, perhaps you could have missals available and make notes on what pages various parts are found in the missal, if they want to follow along.

 

[z_0101]

most Catholics only go to church for weddings and funerals anyway.

:bighanky: Sad, but apparently true… add the Hallmark occasions to the above and you’ve a fair picture.

Just slightly less than half (47% From one of the last Gallop polls 2009) regularly attend Mass so it is fair to say “most;” however, I would have used the word “many” instead. Protestant faiths are also experiencing the same attendance levels as the Catholics. This is a sad sign of the times.

BRIGHT SIDE
At least one person in each pew should know what’s going on AND it’s a wedding - the Holy Sprit may inspire a person or two!

 

[EasterJoy]

We had a booklet like this, but we wrote it ourselves. It had a “OK, you’ve been dropped onto Planet Catholic, and you have no idea what we’re even doing. Here’s our stab at an explanation, so you won’t feel like you’re having that awful dream where you’re taking an exam but you missed all the lectures…and no, there will not be an exam today!” We put enough into it that the Catholics actually told us they’d learned a few things from it.

Short of that, if the priest marrying you will agree to do it I would ask him if he could give instructions either before Mass or as he goes along, to put everyone at ease. Things like: yes, it is OK to sit while we’re all kneeling. Many priests do this on a regular basis for funerals already. I would suspect you just have to ask, and he’ll ask you to remind him when the day comes.

 

[ProVobis]

I agree and from your description of your future step-father-in-law he sounds like a first class jerk and the kind of man most people dread sitting next to at Thanksgiving!

That’s rather harsh. Maybe he just doesn’t care for all the white vestments, among other things.

 

[Della]

Hello The Buggiest! Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials.

I think the easiest thing to do would be to have a program of the Wedding Mass for each guest to follow the ceremony. It would have the hymns with page numbers listed (if you are having congregational singing), the first reading, the second reading, with scriptural references, and responroial Psalm, Gospel reading the same, the responses for everyone to recite, etc. Perhaps your parish already has a template for such programs. That way you don’t have to explain everything on paper. It would open the door for any questions they might have. Just my :twocents: