Looking vs lusting

[bonnjer]

As a single guy, it is sometimes hard for me to not look at a woman and think, “Wow, she’s gorgeous!” At what point does it become lustful, though? It seems like every time I go to confession, I’m talking about having impure thoughts, even though I’m working hard at reigning in my thoughts before it goes too far. I always feel like I struggle in this area.

 

[s.cono]

When you start thinking things about her that you wouldn’t want to be thinking about your sister or your cousin (or fill in whatever other relative you choose.).

 

[Dan_Defender]

When you start thinking things about her that you wouldn’t want to be thinking about your sister or your cousin

This. Advice:
‘Above all, we must be especially alert against the beginnings of temptation, for the enemy is more easily conquered if he is refused admittance to the mind and is met beyond the threshold when he knocks.’ - The Imitation of Christ

 

[JackMcCoy]

Temptation is out there all the time. It is difficult to control our thoughts when we see members of our opposite sex. The things that attract us to those who will become our girlfriend or future wife are some of the same things that lead us to lustful thoughts. All we can do is try to keep our thoughts as clean as possible. Sonmetimes the line between simple attraction and lust is a fine line. I guess that is what confession is for.

 

[Lea101]

Looking: noticing her existence, or beauty.

Lusting: using her as a tool for your pleasure. I.e. Thinking of her in a sexual manner.

The Church defines it as:
Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes.