Losing Friends

  • Thread starter Thread starter Eruvande
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
E

Eruvande

Guest
I told a really good friend that I was thinking of becoming Catholic, and she flat out told me what a wicked thought that was and that I needed prayer. I anticipated my interest in Catholicism would cause some friction, but am really shocked at the vehemence of her reaction. I feel scared and unsure of myself now.

Most of what she brought up is easily refuted by stuff regularly posted here on Catholic Answers, but I’m totally lacking in confidence. I’m at the stage where I’m going along to mass, but don’t really know any Catholics yet, and I admit, I’m afraid of losing all my friends if and when I swim the Tiber. I also know that I should put truth above fear of man, but it’s easier said than done.
 
I found that I lost friends no matter what religion you switch to. Some you do keep but you find that it might not be the same because of differences of opinions, etc. Some of course like your friend has quite strong, negative reactions. But you will find Catholic friends eventually. Once you become Catholic and become more involved in the church they will come. 🙂 In the meantime, you can use the wonderful internet to have conversations with other Catholics to feel connected as you take the first step, (and no doubt it can be scary/nervewracking) but once you get going I’m sure you will do fine.
 
I’m sorry for the reaction, but honestly, I’m not surprised. Immerse yourself with other Catholics, and you will forge other friendships with those of similar values and beliefs. I’ve had some family members distance themselves from me once I became active in the Church again, and I’ve also found that I’ve had to distance myself from some of them, too. But God really does send other good, holy people into you life, too.
 
If you lose your friends because you become Catholic, they’re not friends to begin with.

A friend will support your in your decision and not reject you.

Jim
 
It sounds like your friend is scared for you, based on the erroneous information that she has. This just means she doesn’t know better. It doesn’t mean she isn’t your friend, or has never been your friend.

There’s a saying: “Metal sharpens metal.” Your friend’s reaction is startling, but how you handle it will help you (and hopefully, your friend). There will always be people who are shocked at a Catholic, shocked at any Christian, shocked at anybody believing in God. You will need to get used to explaining your Catholic beliefs to other people - maybe not every day, but you will get questions and comments from time to time. Starting with a friend isn’t the worst scenario, even though it ups the emotional drama.

And of course it’s okay to say that you don’t know something, or that you’re newly interested and will have to look stuff up, or that you’re not yet sure you agree with something. Just do your best, and trust God.

Spreading knowledge and reducing unfounded fear is a service to Him Who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. And prayers are always helpful, even if God answers your friend’s request differently than what she intended.
 
Those people are not your true friends. They are not helping you. If you lose them, you are losing nothing of value. Remember that many people are drawn to evil by ill-chosen “friends.”
 
John 15:21
They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the one who sent me.

Be at peace. You are doing God’s will.
God bless you.
 
As earlier posters sad - your true friends will support you.
However, to humbly offer a cautionary note - If you try to avoid making too big an issue of your Faith, which is actually something private between yourself and Almighty God, you are more likely to be able to live your life as usual with your friends. Some new converts can unwittingly be very O.T.T!!!

God bless you. 🙂
 
Sorry to hear about your problem. Draw strength from the fact that you’re not alone. Myself I was baptized as a baby but have waited until now, as an adult, to make my first communion and confirmation. God really shows you who loves you at times like this let me tell you. Lucky for me my girlfriend was for it but my guy friends were another story. The things they told me, the hate, my own friends. Anyway… get into an RC IA program and you’ll get good honest information, support and you will meet others of like mind.
 
Emily2014 said:
As earlier posters sad - your true friends will support you.
However, to humbly offer a cautionary note - If you try to avoid making too big an issue of your Faith, which is actually something private between yourself and Almighty God, you are more likely to be able to live your life as usual with your friends. Some new converts can unwittingly be very O.T.T!!!

God bless you. 🙂
Click to expand...
actually, with the new evangelization, i think the church is telling us our faith shouldn’t be private?
 
bisco said:
actually, with the new evangelization, i think the church is telling us our faith shouldn’t be private?
Click to expand...
It depends upon what you mean by “private.” There is nothing wrong with discreetly living your faith—in fact, letting your actions speak for you is often more effective than words. We should not hide our faith, and denying it isn’t an option. On the other hand, turning every conversation into a soliloquy on what you believe can be very off-putting, and driving people away from the truth obviously isn’t the point of evangelization.
 
thank you everyone for your kind replies. I don’t plan to be OTT, I’m quite a reserved sort of person, so will not be cut out for an evangelist. TBH, with this friend the mere mention of Catholicism set her off. I just want to follow my heart and the Holy Spirit - it’s just really hard not knowing any Catholics in real life when my entire circle is made up of evangelicals. Making friends on the internet does help, that’s true.

I suppose it doesn’t help that I’m really taking my time over conversion - just because I want to be cast iron sure that I’m hearing from God about this, and also because my husband is reticent about it, though he’s coming round slowly.
 
consider taking the RCIA class. it’s not binding, and you can drop out if you feel it’s not right for you. it’s a good way to meet people, some catholic, and some on a journey like you. i just finished last spring and was fortunate to have a priest as the teacher. he was wonderful, and there were two experienced catholics there. my wife, who is catholic, came to all the classes and learned quite a bit herself. God bless!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top