Losing My Faith

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I’m still not giving up. I want to trust in Jesus completely.
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That is proof enough, or FAITH enough 🙂 that the Holy Spirit is with you. Continue your struggle. And I do want to commend you for “speaking out” about it… Keeping thoughts of death and hopelessness locked up inside, no matter how cliche it sounds, is more dangerous than admitting to them… You’ve identified the disease… now you’re searching for the cure. And who better to look to but Christ? Give your despair to Him, to do with it as He wills.

God bless 🙂
 
Darkest Hour,

You are under spiritual attack. You may be well served finding a book or two on spiritual warfare. If you have general depression it could also be a medical issue and you might want to get this checked out.

You can be consoled by the fact that many of us reading this forum will offer up prayers on your behalf. May God bless you and give you peace of mind, heart and soul.
 
Maybe people reading this are praying for me. I don’t know. The reason I’m talking about this here is because I have no one in real life that I can talk to about this. The priests at my Church are usually busy and hard to come across and I usually refuse to speak to any of my fellow parishioners because I’ve been shunned by some of them in the past. I have no real friends and I can’t go to my family because I think I’m the only practicing Catholic left in my family.

It’s just so hard to believe when my mind is constantly telling me that there is no God or that the one who exists doesn’t love me enough to grant me eternal life. It’s become too hard for me to comprehend the existance of the soul for some reason. If this life is all there is, then this life means nothing.

My faith isn’t totally gone. If it were I guess I’d be out looking ar porn or doing something horrible rather than praying and going to the Sacraments. I’m sure that St. Therese did a much better job of dealing with this than I am.
 
Wow,

This sounds like me. I was getting horribly upset about this, to the point I was coming close to having panic attacks about it. Well, other than the fact that I am not Catholic (atleast not yet).

I started reading a little of my bible everyday. At first the Old Testament seemed a little depressing to me until it hit me how they lived with out knowing and still made it through. It has helped a lot, and now I feel a lot closer to who I am.

I am guessing that a lot of people go through times like this when life is changing and they do not get to be children any more. Going from being a child to an adult seems to be so hard.

Kat
 
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Pax:
Darkest Hour,

[You are under spiritual attack].

I agree. “For our struggle is not with the flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits… Therefore put on the armor of God, that you may be able to resist on the evil day and, having done everything, to hold your ground” Ephesians 6:12-13
I will pray for you at adoration tonight.
Love,
Jeanne
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It´s hard the current society where a practicant catholic is a hero and uncomprehended, in my opinion you have to ask the priest advices and asked him if you could be a cathecists, the catholics have to be united and loved because alone, we are in doubts and problems, I am 21 and I see many times, many students like me that are agnostics and they´re happy and I doubt , it´s easy, but the things change and people without God is lost, because alone we are against a tall wall, I pray for you Darkest Hour 1980, greetings and remember help in your parish, it´s the best way to be loved and comprehended and ask your doubts,
 
Satan doesn’t care about the atheists, he has them in his thrall.
It’s Christians he targets, hardest of all. He’s pushing you toward the edge, don’t let him make you fall!

🙂

Persevere in the Faith, and every conquered doubt will be another reinforcement.
 
Greetings Darkest Hour,

The best advice is to pray. The next is to trust GOD. After that I would research why we believe what we do. That is a fasinating discovery just waiting to be found by you. The reasons can be explained but they mean much more when they are discovered on our own effort. My wife [cradle catholic] and I [convert] have had our faith deepened and inriched on that journey. The rcia that I went through enlightened my wife on how little 12years in catholic school had taught her on our faith. We will keep you in our prayers. Love
chief and family
 
I had similar thoughts in regards to what you are having “Darkest Hour.” I was thinking constantly about death and even had a desire to hurt myself at times and was wondering “why should I even bother?” I spoke to a good priest and he helped me find a devoutly Catholic doctor who diagnosed me with depression and put me on prozac. It helped, and now I am off of it. I don’t want to just medicate your problems away. You pointed to many other difficulties (problems with family/lack of friends) which could play into depression. It may not be that, but it can be worth looking at.

One other thing that helped me in my depression was reading G.K. Chesterton. He is just so funny and paints such a beautiful picture of things without ignoring the bad and the difficult. His writings are available on the web here:
dur.ac.uk/martin.ward/gkc/books/index.html

I would recommend his work on “Saint Thomas Aquinas” as well as Heretics and Orthodoxy. The Ballad of the White Horse is also quite good. The Everlasting Man is quite thick, but if you read the second half (about Jesus and the Church) it is very inspiring. I hope this helps! God bless and I’ll keep you in my prayers!
 
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DarkestHour1980:
I’m in a situation in which I feel as if my faith is slowly diminishing. I was born Catholic but I didn’t start practicing my faith until I was 15. I’ve never had any serious doubts about what believed in. However, a few weeks ago, this horrible feeling came over me. For some reason, I find it very hard to believe in God and in the promises that He has made to us, including the promise of Eternal Life. I’ve become obsessed with the idea that this life could be all there is and it causes me much pain. All I can think about is death. I’ve become more depressed and I can’t enjoy life. Inspite of all this, I still continue to go to Mass, Confession, and I pray the rosary every day. I still find myself talking about Our Lord with others more often than before. I still believe. It’s just that my mind is telling me that everything I believe and hope for is a lie. I was wondering if anyone on here have ever gone through something similar or if anyone could just pray for me.
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It sounds to me as if you may be experiencing seasonal depression. You mentioned that these feelings came on a few weeks ago, and that all you can think about is death. I encourage you to share this information with a medical professional. I will pray for you. Please also pray for me. Your devotion to Our Lord and Our Blessed Mother is inspiring. 🙂
 
DarkestHour1980 Find yourself a good strong Catholic-Christian ministry. I know Couples for Christ and Singles for Christ is very big in the NOVA area. Yes we will be praying for you.
 
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DarkestHour1980:
I’m in a situation in which I feel as if my faith is slowly diminishing. I was born Catholic but I didn’t start practicing my faith until I was 15. I’ve never had any serious doubts about what believed in. However, a few weeks ago, this horrible feeling came over me. For some reason, I find it very hard to believe in God and in the promises that He has made to us, including the promise of Eternal Life. I’ve become obsessed with the idea that this life could be all there is and it causes me much pain. All I can think about is death. I’ve become more depressed and I can’t enjoy life. Inspite of all this, I still continue to go to Mass, Confession, and I pray the rosary every day. I still find myself talking about Our Lord with others more often than before. I still believe. It’s just that my mind is telling me that everything I believe and hope for is a lie. I was wondering if anyone on here have ever gone through something similar or if anyone could just pray for me.
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I have also felt this way before. Try not to let it bother you too much. That’s what satan wants. I have noticed that the more I try to be a better person and get closer to God, the more attacks I get in order to bring me back down. Sometimes I’ll catch myself thinking “It’s not worth it, I’ll never be good enough for God.” But I know this isn’t true. It’s just the devil trying to discourage me from living in line with God. To me, these attacks just help to prove that there is a God. Because if you notice, when your not being good and you’re in a spiritual slump (living away from God), these thoughts and feelings are non-existant. That’s the way it’s been for me anyways. Just see this as proof that you must be doing something right. Because he wouldn’t be bothering you if you were where he wanted you to be. I hope this makes sense?! 🙂
 
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