Lost and Confused about God

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ivory

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If this doesn’t belong in this part of the forum, or if it doesn’t belong at all, please let me know.

I am 15 years old, and I’m looking to become Catholic. In fact, I have classes so I can be baptized and conformed starting this Friday. But I am still lost and struggling with my spirituality. I always believed in God, but I was always confused about how everything works and which Christian faith is the right one, in fact, I still have problems with this.

My Catholic girlfriend told me that I should become Catholic, so I considered it. One Sunday about two months ago, I decided to go to Mass. I was already nervous since I felt like I didn’t belong in a Catholic church at all. As soon as I stepped inside, I was overcome with emotions. I ran into the bathroom, where I cried for about five minutes. I had no idea what came over me. My girlfriend would later tell me that what I felt was the Holy Spirit entering me.

This event convinced me that becoming Catholic was the right thing for me to do, but I’m still very lost. A lot of the time, I feel this empy feeling of dread. My mind for a while now has been in turmoil, and I think that God is the only way I can clear my mind and fill the empty void in me. I was hoping that this community could answer some of the raging questions in my mind.

Thank you for your time.
  • Ryan
 
Dear Ryan,

Is there anything else happening in your life or hidden emotions that might be causing this feeling of dread? We usually feel that kind of dread when we have some hidden or half-conscious emotional issues that are unresolved, maybe from the past, or some degree of depression. Do you think this might have some basis for you, dear Ryan? At 15 so much is happening in a teen’s life, so many things yet to resolve.

Kindly, Trishie

As you continue with the classes you mention, perhaps some of these spiritual issues will naturally resolve as you learn more.
Would it be helpful to you to explain any of your points of confusion on this tread?
I pray God will help you to find the truth and to find peace.
 
I think at sometime most of us are lost and confused about God and spirituality and the teen years are usually an age of questioning. I would like to welcome you on your journey to becoming a Catholic. I know that for me the closer I drew to Jesus Christ the more I understood my relationship with God and his plans for me. I would suggest getting to know Jesus. Read the gospel of John in your bible and the other gospels.You may consider asking your parents to purchase you a Catholic bible if you do not have one or perhaps your new parish can provide one for you. My 14 year old has a youth bible, I am considering this one as he will be in HS next year , catalog.osv.com/Catalog.aspx?SimpleDisplay=true&ProductCode=T129
if the Church you will be attending has a youth group, please consider joining.
I bought this book for my 14 year old and he likes it for answering some of his questions, I’ve used it many a time as well 🙂

amazon.com/Did-Adam-Have-Belly-Buttons/dp/096592288X

God bless you.
 
Trishie said:
Would it be helpful to you to explain any of your points of confusion on this tread?
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Well, mainly, I find all of this overwhelming. I tried to do my own research, but I quickly got in way over my head. I hope as I start my classes it’ll all be clear to me. I guess some of my confusion is because I’m starting off at a relatively late age, considering most of the Catholics I know have already been baptized and recently confirmed.

As for the emptiness, I’m starting to guess mabye it’s because I’m realizing how far I am from God after my experiance at Mass that Sunday. I never felt anything like that before. I also kinda think after all these years I’ve blown off chruch, I’m not worthy of God’s forgiveness or love.

I thank you all who read my post.
 
ivory said:
Well, mainly, I find all of this overwhelming. I tried to do my own research, but I quickly got in way over my head. I hope as I start my classes it’ll all be clear to me. I guess some of my confusion is because I’m starting off at a relatively late age, considering most of the Catholics I know have already been baptized and recently confirmed.
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Well, I was baptised and confirmed this past Easter Vigil, after RCIA of course, and I’ll be 50 on the 16th of June. My wife had the same “treatment”, and she’s a wee-bit older than I am.

I’m not quite sure what you mean by “relatively late age”. 🙂
As for the emptiness, I’m starting to guess mabye it’s because I’m realizing how far I am from God after my experiance at Mass that Sunday. I never felt anything like that before. I also kinda think after all these years I’ve blown off chruch, I’m not worthy of God’s forgiveness or love.
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I thank you all who read my post.
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You simply need to humbly RELAX, and remember that God wants only what is best for you, which will be given you as you get more comfortable with being in the Church.

You are UTTERLY worthy of getting what God wants with all His heart to give you. You just need to, once again, RELAX and accept it. 🙂

I would suggest you start with some “beginner” reading, though, as opposed to picking up a copy of the Summa!

So, some starter material:
  1. Handbook for Today’s Catholic
  2. The Catechism (as a reference to explain the “Handbook”)
  3. Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (which is an easier read than the full blown catechism)
  4. An RSV-CE bible (and a Douay-Rheims bible if you like NICE english language)
…and ASK any question you have of us whenever you have it! 🙂
 
Ryan! you said,
“I also kinda think after all these years I’ve blown off church, I’m not worthy of God’s forgiveness or love.”

Not at all! In the past, you were acting out of the particular state and understanding you had then. You see things a little differently now and are trying to act out of your new appreciation for the value of God and religion. The past is gone, finished.
We are glad, and celebrate that you care now and that you are trying to respond.

Ryan, we all feel sometimes, and even often, that we’re not ‘as close’ to God as we ‘should’ be! All of us are trying to respond to God’s graces the best we can manage. We fail sometimes, but what God is wanting is for us to keep trying. You’re not less worthy than a lot of us others who are at Mass with you throughout the world. Be kinder to yourself!
Jesus, please help Ryan to place his trust in Your grace, in Your quiet leading, in Your inexhaustable and untiring love for him. May Ryan often say, “Jesus, I trust in You”.

However you feel, you’re doing well, Ryan.
God bless you in every moment of your life…Trishie
 
God richly bless you, Ryan! …and welcome to CAF:wave: you are a very new member indeed…I hope you will find these Forums rewarding and indeed consoling, and in every way. And yes, your OP belongs very much in this Spirituality Forum.
I’m not worthy of God’s forgiveness or love.
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Rest assured that not one of us is worthy…we are all sinners whom God smiles upon lovingly and tenderly as we struggle and strive wherever our struggling and striving may be…and rest assured too that every single one of us somewhere or other is engaged in a struggle and striving. Rest assured too that not all of us by far can feel God’s Loving smile and tenderness with His Love and Mercy shining on us…we may not feel it, we simply trust and believe in it for it is so as Scripture and The Church tells us. God loves us with tender merciful compassion and understanding because we are His beloved children whom He has made to and for His Joy.

God’s Mercy exists because we are all, every last one of us, sinners falling down somewhere or other and His Mercy embraces totally and Lovingly simply for the asking and because He does Love us…so much does He love us. How do I know? - because Scripture and The Church tells me so.

“Saints are sinners who dont give up”!

May The Lord grant to you soon His Peace and His Joy never to leave you again. I hope that your classes will go well in every way and that you will soon feel their benefit and much consolation and comfort. I will be keeping you in my prayers and please let us know when the big day of Baptism and Confirmation is coming up so we can share in the great joy of this day with you - and how the classes do progress as you move closer to the great day…and a big welcome to these Forums again!..Barb:)
 
ivory said:
Well, mainly, I find all of this overwhelming. I tried to do my own research, but I quickly got in way over my head. I hope as I start my classes it’ll all be clear to me. I guess some of my confusion is because I’m starting off at a relatively late age, considering most of the Catholics I know have already been baptized and recently confirmed.

As for the emptiness, I’m starting to guess mabye it’s because I’m realizing how far I am from God after my experiance at Mass that Sunday. I never felt anything like that before. I also kinda think after all these years I’ve blown off chruch, I’m not worthy of God’s forgiveness or love.

I thank you all who read my post.
Click to expand...
Hello Ivory,

There are many stories about people who committed great sins but became saints. That’s what it’s all about – our trying to overcome our sinfulness to become saints. Look at St. Paul – who as a zealous Jew, was responsible for the deaths and persecution of many Christians, before his conversion. Plow through some of his epistles (letters) in the New Testament – I think 14 were written by him to some of the Christian communities he evangelized to. Look at St. Augustine, who lived about 1600 years ago. He rejected the faith and lived the fast life, committing many sins, before he finally submitted his will to God’s. He became a great bishop (of Hippo, in northern Africa). God’s tender mercy is greater than any sin.

St. Augustine prayed “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.” God draws all of us toward him. For the rest of your life, you’ll learn about God, and what his will is for you. Our journeys of faith can sometimes seem overwhelming for all of us. Keep praying, studying, and loving. Use the scriptures to learn, to reflect, to pray. And of course rest in our Lord. For me, participating in the Mass is the best way to do that, and I make time for quiet, private prayer every night. You don’t have to know everything about the faith to do that. Remember that God is always with you.

about St. Paul and St. Augustine (sometimes we’re taught, inspired, or comforted, when we read about the saints):

catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=91
catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=418
 
Ivory,

Best thing to do is just trust in God. That’s what I did when I converted. I put all my hope and trust in the Lord, and let him take care of everything. This is the best way to combat doubts, fears, and any other tribulations or temptations you may receive.
 
ivory said:
If this doesn’t belong in this part of the forum, or if it doesn’t belong at all, please let me know.

I am 15 years old, and I’m looking to become Catholic. In fact, I have classes so I can be baptized and conformed starting this Friday. But I am still lost and struggling with my spirituality. I always believed in God, but I was always confused about how everything works and which Christian faith is the right one, in fact, I still have problems with this.

My Catholic girlfriend told me that I should become Catholic, so I considered it. One Sunday about two months ago, I decided to go to Mass. I was already nervous since I felt like I didn’t belong in a Catholic church at all. As soon as I stepped inside, I was overcome with emotions. I ran into the bathroom, where I cried for about five minutes. I had no idea what came over me. My girlfriend would later tell me that what I felt was the Holy Spirit entering me.

This event convinced me that becoming Catholic was the right thing for me to do, but I’m still very lost. A lot of the time, I feel this empy feeling of dread. My mind for a while now has been in turmoil, and I think that God is the only way I can clear my mind and fill the empty void in me. I was hoping that this community could answer some of the raging questions in my mind.

Thank you for your time.
  • Ryan
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Ryan, you and I have a lot in common. I, too, am 15 years old and have had many struggles with my faith, believing, but yet seeming lost. The only difference is that I have been Catholic all my life, and you are just now becomming one. Ryan, the best thing to do, other than to pray, is just to let things take shape. Start the classes, and go on your way to becomming Catholic. Let God say something to you through this experience. God is trying to work on you, trying to make a fixture in your heart. But, the best thing to do is simply to pray and read your Bible. Tell God that you are commited to being his servant and ask him to fill you with the Holy Spirit. As far as which Christian religion is the right one, I think that it varies by person. So long as you are determined to do God’s work, to follow God and obey his commandments, to be a man of God, then He couldn’t care less if you are Catholic or Methodist or any other religion. However, it is my belief that (at least for me) the Catholic Church provides many sacrements and the beautiful Mass that helps you grow closer to God. Peace be with you Ryan, and Good luck.

-Nik
 
Hi Ryan. BIG HUG to you :hug1: Please know, that Jesus loves you VERY, VERY much. If you’re ever in doubt, I have a solution for you. Just go to your nearest Catholic Church… and sit in the Presence of Jesus in the Tabernacle. Just sit there, and bask in His love for you. You don’t have to say even one word. Just sit with Him.

I will pray for you on your journey. In the words of our late Pope John Paul II… “Be Not Afraid!”. And always remember the words which Jesus Himself, asked St. Faustina to give to the world… “Jesus, I trust in Thee”.

God bless you, Ryan! 🙂
 
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