Hi everyone. This is a fairly simple question, but it has often caught me off guard. In the Gospel, Jesus says that we must love him more than our family, friends and ourselves. I have trouble understanding this, I understand that we should definately love Jesus more than ourselves, but what does it mean to love him more than our family? What does it mean for a mother to love Jesus more than her own children? How is this possible? What does this mean?
I have pondered this as well. When my dad died, I was able to honestly “release” him to God’s loving hands. I wondered if I’d be able to do that with my child, though. If the LORD took my child home, would I be angry? Resentful? Would I turn away from God?
Would I still be able to praise God for His goodness? Of course I would grieve … but could I honestly trust God enough to give Him my child if He asked it, as Abraham was prepared to do?
Have you ever heard someone say, “If so-and-so isn’t in heaven, I don’t want to be there either!”
Those are all things I’ve pondered, and prayed about; I asked God to search my heart and show me. I realized that deep down, I really did love certain people more than I loved God. I began to pray that God change my heart; that He help me to love Him and desire Him more than anyone or anything else.
It has taken time, and He has shown me areas where I need to work. But what it has come down to, for me, is truly trusting Him and placing Him first before all else. God really is good, all the time, even in times of great trial or deep grief.
I’m not certain if I explained that very well; I just know I was where you are and completely understand your question. And I know you will be greatly blessed if you continue to ponder it and pray for deeper understanding. I think these things prepare us spiritually and help us draw closer to God for strength and also for peace. I am more at peace now, trusting that He gave my children to me for a time to care for, but ultimately they are His and safe in His loving hands, always.