lukewarm family

[Neithan]

My Dad is a lapsed Catholic who is in the process of coming back to the Church, but he really seems to have no strong desire to do so. In Canada, New Year’ Day, the Solemnity of Mary Mother of God, is one of only two Holy Days of Obligation - the other being Christmas. I told my Dad that he needs to attend Mass, but he made no effort to do so. The parishes in our neighbourhood only had Mass this morning, and have none this evening. I said he might have to drive downtown to the Cathedral but he answered that he would not do that, even though I told him that it is a serious obligation which would mean a sin not to go. I finally found a parish near our area that has an evening Mass, so he agreed to go.
I feel like if he has no real desire, that he’ll only go if it’s convenient… is it really worth it for me to make such an effort to persuade him to go to Mass? I already went, but I’m pretty sure if I don’t go again with my Dad then he won’t go at all.

How much effort should we give to family that shows some interest but is generally lukewarm to the faith? Is it harmful maybe if we do too much, and ‘hold their hand’ so to speak, or if it seems like they are only doing us a favour by fulfilling their obligations? Is it even faith at all, then, if it feels so forced?
Maybe it would be better to let it go and let God.

 

[Highwayhound]

My Dad is a lapsed Catholic who is in the process of coming back to the Church, but he really seems to have no strong desire to do so. In Canada, New Year’ Day, the Solemnity of Mary Mother of God, is one of only two Holy Days of Obligation - the other being Christmas. I told my Dad that he needs to attend Mass, but he made no effort to do so. The parishes in our neighbourhood only had Mass this morning, and have none this evening. I said he might have to drive downtown to the Cathedral but he answered that he would not do that, even though I told him that it is a serious obligation which would mean a sin not to go. I finally found a parish near our area that has an evening Mass, so he agreed to go.
I feel like if he has no real desire, that he’ll only go if it’s convenient… is it really worth it for me to make such an effort to persuade him to go to Mass? I already went, but I’m pretty sure if I don’t go again with my Dad then he won’t go at all.

How much effort should we give to family that shows some interest but is generally lukewarm to the faith? Is it harmful maybe if we do too much, and ‘hold their hand’ so to speak, or if it seems like they are only doing us a favour by fulfilling their obligations? Is it even faith at all, then, if it feels so forced?
Maybe it would be better to let it go and let God.

I think it is great that you have a chance to go to mass with you dad. It is a chance I never had. Enjoy the mass and maybe you guys can go out afterwards for dinner or Orange Julius or something. Help your dad as much as you can, but be patient and loving as you do.

 

[the_phoenix]

Dear Neithan,

It seems the spiritual battle is really on this Christmas season. When I went home to visit family, the odd thing is that all of the family disagreements (sadly, there was more than one) had nothing to do personally with myself or the other individuals … it all had to do with someone brushing off a teaching of the Catholic Church, and me being there to defend the Church.

One instance of this was where a teenage relative of mine was eating shortly before Midnight Mass, and I simply commented “You have 15 more minutes to eat before the one-hour fast before Communion.” An older relative started bickering/mumbling in a sarcastic tone "Ah, Communion fast … " At that point I clearly stated, “As a Catholic, I believe that the Holy Eucharist is the Body of Christ.” The good thing is, right then, another relative rushed into the room to back me up, saying “You Will Put Down the Food Right Now, Get on Your Coat, and Get Ready for Mass.”

“Admonish the Sinner” is a spiritual work of mercy. It doesn’t mean, as some might think, to beat people over the head with Truth, … That said, it does mean drawing people’s attention to the Truth in an appropriate situation when the Faith is about to be disrespected, disregarded, etc.

Sounds to me Neithan like you did a very good job on your part at helping your father do the right thing for the salvation of his soul. Good for you, we need more like you! :clapping: :tiphat:

One suggestion, which you’re very likely already doing: Pray.

On this Christmas trip I knew there’d be challenges, so I prayed the Rosary … and prayed specially hard to St. Michael the Archangel. :angel1: :knight1: