Lying about where you are going...so that you can go to confession?

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thememphisman

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i’ve got a problem here, i told my boss i had a meeting at my parish from 3:00-4:00 and that i really only to be there to show up and sign some stuff and get some papers, so i wouldnt have to stay long. well really i was going to confession which is available from 3:00-4:00. would this be another sin bc i lied to my boss so that i could go to confession. i feel like i really needed to go bc i would be going to mass on sunday and there is no confession available before the 11am mass. plus i cant function when i have a mortal sin weighing down on me…nothing feels right or good. any suggestions?
 
thememphisman said:
i’ve got a problem here, i told my boss i had a meeting at my parish from 3:00-4:00 and that i really only to be there to show up and sign some stuff and get some papers, so i wouldnt have to stay long. well really i was going to confession which is available from 3:00-4:00. would this be another sin bc i lied to my boss so that i could go to confession. i feel like i really needed to go bc i would be going to mass on sunday and there is no confession available before the 11am mass. plus i cant function when i have a mortal sin weighing down on me…nothing feels right or good. any suggestions?
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IANAP; that said, you did what you needed, so at most, this is a venial sin. The sin would not be the lie so much as the “stealing” of the boss’ time that he is paying you for, but this is not a huge amount of value, so if anything, only a venial sin.

Next time bear the catch in mind when tempted to commit a mortal sin!🤷

Again, IANAP; correct as needed:) ICXC NIKA
 
A couple of thoughts.

First, we are obliged to go to confession as soon as is reasonably possible. If work commitments prevent it, we can pray an act of contrition and resolve to confess our sins at the first opportunity, and we can know that we have God’s forgiveness. You could ask your priest for confession at some other opportunity, even if it’s in the sacristy 5 mins before Sunday mass. Once we have repented and resolved to confess our sins, we no longer have a mortal sin ‘on our conscience’, but don’t use that as an excuse not to go to confession.

I am told, though I don’t have the exact canon to quote (maybe someone can provide it) that it is even licit to receive Holy Communion if we have repented of a mortal sin but haven’t had the opportunity to confess it, as long as we then confess at the first opportunity, and not more than 28 days after.

Second, another option might be to phrase your request for time off in terms that would not strictly be a lie, but would help your (non-Catholic?) boss to understand the gravity of your need for confession. For example, ‘I have been having some health problems, and have an appointment to see a specialist’ or ‘I need to have some important repair work done, and this is the only time the man could come and see me’. Both are kind-of true metaphors of the work that is done in confession, and would constitute ‘mental reservation’ rather than an outright lie.

God bless you for your devotion to the sacrament of reconciliation.
 
DL82 said:
A couple of thoughts.

First, we are obliged to go to confession as soon as is reasonably possible. If work commitments prevent it, we can pray an act of contrition and resolve to confess our sins at the first opportunity, and we can know that we have God’s forgiveness. You could ask your priest for confession at some other opportunity, even if it’s in the sacristy 5 mins before Sunday mass. Once we have repented and resolved to confess our sins, we no longer have a mortal sin ‘on our conscience’, but don’t use that as an excuse not to go to confession.

I am told, though I don’t have the exact canon to quote (maybe someone can provide it) that it is even licit to receive Holy Communion if we have repented of a mortal sin but haven’t had the opportunity to confess it, as long as we then confess at the first opportunity, and not more than 28 days after.

There is no such teaching. You are probably thinking of Canon law 916 which says-

"Anyone who is conscious of grave sin may not celebrate Mass or receive the Body of the Lord without previously having been to sacramental confession, unless there is a grave reason and there is no opportunity to confess; in this case the person is to remember the obligation to make an act of perfect contrition, which includes the resolve to go to confession as soon as possible." [Canon Law # 916]

Grave reason is like if you are on the battlefield or in danger of death or traveling to country without a Catholic Church or you are the only priest who can celebrate the Mass…

Second, another option might be to phrase your request for time off in terms that would not strictly be a lie, but would help your (non-Catholic?) boss to understand the gravity of your need for confession. For example, ‘I have been having some health problems, and have an appointment to see a specialist’ or ‘I need to have some important repair work done, and this is the only time the man could come and see me’. Both are kind-of true metaphors of the work that is done in confession, and would constitute ‘mental reservation’ rather than an outright lie.

God bless you for your devotion to the sacrament of reconciliation.
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thememphisman said:
i’ve got a problem here, i told my boss i had a meeting at my parish from 3:00-4:00 and that i really only to be there to show up and sign some stuff and get some papers, so i wouldnt have to stay long. well really i was going to confession which is available from 3:00-4:00. would this be another sin bc i lied to my boss so that i could go to confession. i feel like i really needed to go bc i would be going to mass on sunday and there is no confession available before the 11am mass. plus i cant function when i have a mortal sin weighing down on me…nothing feels right or good. any suggestions?
Click to expand...
I would say that your intention was not to deceive your boss as much as it was to reconcile with God. Definitively you did lie, but that was a decision based on the urgency that you felt because of your broken relationship with God (or so you accessed). I would have to agree that if it was indeed a sin at all it would be a venial sin. If it continues to bother you just mention it the next time you go to reconciliation. I definitely would not let that hold me back from the Eucharist. Remember the Spirit of the Law vs. the Letter of the Law… teachccd
 
Well, if you had just said you had a meeting at your parish that would have been truthful, since you were meeting the priest in confession. The extra part about the papers, etc., could have been left out. When we have a good reason for not wanting someone else to know something personal about ourselves, we can’t lie but we don’t have to tell them everything. They can draw their own conclusions from what we say.
 
I would say you should have left it at the parish meeting, and just so long as you weren’t being paid, it’s fine.
 
How about, “I have a time-sensitive errand I need to take care of today. I’ll be back as quickly as I can, and I’ll stay late today or shorten my lunch hour tomorrow to make up the time.”

Betsy
 
I believe this was, at most, a venial sin. Speak to your priest next time you are in confession. If you feel that you cannot tell your boss about going to Confession, I recommend sticking with the meeting idea. There is no need to invent additional details.
 
Sometimes it is embarassing to say something like I am going to confession. Just say I want to go to a Church service and it is only available between 3 and 4, or maybe I need to meet with my pastor between 3 and 4 today.

IF the boss asks, and they almost never do, just say it is something personal. No need to give specifics, and you would be telling the truth.

In this day and age it is sometimes very difficult to admit that you are doing something religious, BUT I am reminded of Jesus saying something like, if you profess God before men He will proclaim you before men, if you deny God before men He will deny you.

We are all guilty to some degree of denying God in front of others. It takes tremendous courage to openly sign yourself in public and say a prayer before or after meals, especially if most of the folks around you are not Catholic. I had a friend/co-worker who did this all the time, and it made me ashamed of myself because I had never gotten into the habit of doing this.

Some would say, it’s bit of showing off or drawing attention to themselves, but this person was not doing it for anyone else. It was only for themselves and God. She would have done that even if no one else was around or even if no one else noticed. Our faith needs to be a light for others.
 
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