Making a good confession after many years

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LostSoul2018

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Hello Catholic Family! I am sure this question has been asked more times than can be counted but please guide me.
I of course like many am a sinner that goes way back without everything being confessed in my life. I want to be cleansed and forgiven as I now realize my past sins and am sorrowful. When going to confession do I need to be specific to everything in my past or generalize the nature of my sins? I haven’t ever really given a confession that made me mentally at peace after I was finished. Sometimes I got to confession prepared and strong but get nervous and everything becomes a blur. Now that I am growing closer to God and know why my sins are wrong I feel as though I am torturing myself with my own mind. Please help me or direct me to good resources to help with my journey of forgiveness.

God Bless You Now and Forever!!
 
Much will depend on your confessor, JUst tell him what you have said here, and then answer as best you can. At the end of any list you have, pray "for these and all the sins of my past life, I am sorry.

Depending on the years, it may be impossible to remember everything. Your priest will guide you.
Welcome home. 🙏
 
Thank you very much for the welcome home. That really touched my heart because for the first time ever, Christmas mass made me cry from the feeling I had in my heart of being home! I will do as you suggested and tell what I said on here to the priest. I hope it is an easy conversation to have because it’s hard to admit your failures to anyone including yourself. I appreciate the support and will take all I can get through this process.
 
He will be nice. It’s what they do.
Christ loves you,
God bless.
 
That sounds pretty simple but I didn’t think about doing it. I appreciate you bringing it to my attention so I can more prepare myself. I was raised Catholic but wish I would have learned more about my faith earlier so I could to this better. Maybe now I’m just at a place in my life where I’m more serious. Thank you.
 
Welcome home. As @pianistclare has stated; just let the Priest know your situation, he will be understanding. Remember you are not going to tell the Priest anything he hasn’t heard before & won’t hear again. Relax & let the graces of the Sacrament of Reconciliation wash over you. I’ll be praying for your intentions. God bless.
 
It requires a commitment of going more than once. There are things we can confess, but we wait until it is too late to let them go. Take the step to going once, then reflect on things like the Ten Commandments and seven deadly sins. Instances of sin can occur when you allow yourself to be imperfect which we all are. Jesus Christ came because we all fell short of grace.
 
Thank you for the prayers and the blessing! I think I’ll call the priest today and see when I could meet with him. I think before mass I would feel rushed so hopefully it is acceptable to have a meeting. If not I could take time off work to go to a daily mass where it might not be as busy but I need guidance too so it might be a little longer. Will a priest make an appointment with me or does it need to be during a mass with people around?

Thank you also CatholicSpirit for your great advice! I do need to make it a point once I go to keep it up because it gets harder to remember things. What if I do forget something and never remember it?

Thank you for all of your help!
 
Glory be to God. Welcome home ! I too some years ago, returned to faith after 40 years of wandering. During my time in the military ( almost 25 years) I was known as the recreation leader of the immoral minority. I can relate to your situation. You have been given excellent advice by others here. I posted this link below for another member just yesterday. It has helped me tremendously. Give it a view PLEASE…

What may be helpful, prior to your confession, write down what you can remember. Bring it with you to confession. As long as you have perfect contrition, you will be absolved even if you forget many of your offenses. Rest assured, you will be forgiven and your soul made white as snow. If you later remember something you find bothersome, you can bring it up at your NEXT confession. Remember. TRUST in Christ’s Mercy.

 
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Just remember that if the priest has at least a few years of experience, nothing you say in confession will shock him. Nothing. He has heard it all before. He probably hears confessions every week. As some on this forum say, you do not have the monopoly on sin.

As one priest said, “I’ve heard things that would make a sailor blush.”

So don’t feel bad. The priest has heard it all before.

Good luck!
 
@chieft Thank you for your kind words and the much needed video! WOW… I felt so much comfort in that video and will be watching it many times over 😃 I appreciate your understanding of the military lifestyle some of us lived. It is always nice to hear I’m not alone because honestly I feel surrounded by people that make being Catholic seem so easy. I was at a point in my life where my sins didn’t matter to me but I’m now ready to own and confess them. God bless you for the help you have provided me.
 
@Entwhistler 😂 …make a Sailor blush haha now I know I have nothing to worry about!
Thank you for adding your reassurance… I do worry and feel like I am the only one bringing my list of wrong doings in with me and he is sitting there at a loss for words. I haven’t been to confession for a long while and the last time I went it was a mess. Having the support on here to know I’m not alone makes thing a lot less intimidating. God bless you!
 
Keep in mind prior to your confession. The Priest, as your confessor will be returning a lost sheep gone astray to the Shepard and Bishop of his soul. Nothing. Nothing can be more rewarding to your confessor. The Saints and Angels rejoice. Peace be with you my friend.
 
Look up: Catholic Prayer Before a Crucifix
It will bring you comfort
 
Can. 988 §1. A member of the Christian faithful is obliged to confess in kind and number all grave sins committed after baptism and not yet remitted directly through the keys of the Church nor acknowledged in individual confession, of which the person has knowledge after diligent examination of conscience.

Confess all your mortal sins (that haven’t already been confessed) in kind and number. This means that you need to say specify those details necessary to determine what kind of sin it was (e.g. if you fornicated, the other person being married would need to be stated). Mentioning details that notably aggravate a mortal sin without changing its species is advisable but not required (e.g. if you stole a large amount of money from a poor man, it would be sufficient to say that you stole a large amount of money, mentioning the poverty of the victim would be advisable but not normally required, assuming he suffered no special harm). Mentioning the number means you need to say how many times you committed a sin, an estimate is okay.
 
@mbmulkern I’ve never heard of this prayer before but it did for sure bring comfort. When it comes to prayers I sometimes have to read it a few times so I really have a understanding of what it means and not just reciting words. I appreciate it and am thinking about writing a prayer journal to keep with me so I will add this too.

@Arkansan Thank you very much for taking the time to look this up but also giving a great explanation of the meaning! This was a huge help because I wasn’t going to give details but now I will. I also believe after reading your post that maybe by giving the details of my sins I will feel more cleansed after. I first thought maybe this post on giving a confession would have basic answers I already knew but I have learned so much!! Thank you.
 
chieft said:
As long as you have perfect contrition, you will be absolved even if you forget many of your offenses
Click to expand...
Not true, you do not need perfect contrition (motivated by love of God) to be absolved. Imperfect contrition (motivated by fear of hell) is sufficient.
 
I would say, tell the priest your situation and about coming home to the Church. He will be delighted. Tell him how long it has been since your last Confession and then start with the major things and carry on from there. Confess your sins in order of seriousness, starting with the most serious. Making a list beforehand can help (and shred it afterwards). Hold nothing back, just empty it all. If it is very long the priest might stop you after a while and give you a general absolution. So long as you haven’t intentionally held anything back or tried to avoid confessing certain sins then all your sins will be forgiven. You will feel great afterwards and you can start anew.
 
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