Mandatory Reporting in Therapy with Imaginative Child

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nodito

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I’m curious as to how this would play out.

A close family member wants to seek therapy for her adopted daughter, who is 10. The daughter, although very intelligent, seems to be lacking in emotional maturity and social skills. The daughter can be violent (biting, scratching, etc). She’s also prone to making up and embellishing stories. Mom raised several biological children who are now successful adults but is having a lot of difficulty with this child. She tells me there’s a lot of arguing in their house and is hoping a therapist can provide them both with coping strategies and perspective.

I realize that most professionals (teachers, therapists, doctors, etc) are mandatory reporters, meaning if they suspect abuse they have to report it to the state. What happens if the child lies or exaggerates during therapy? Are mandatory reporters required to report all stories told to them during therapy?

Thanks for sharing any experiences you have.
 
nodito said:
I’m curious as to how this would play out.

A close family member wants to seek therapy for her adopted daughter, who is 10. The daughter, although very intelligent, seems to be lacking in emotional maturity and social skills. The daughter can be violent (biting, scratching, etc). She’s also prone to making up and embellishing stories. Mom raised several biological children who are now successful adults but is having a lot of difficulty with this child. She tells me there’s a lot of arguing in their house and is hoping a therapist can provide them both with coping strategies and perspective.

I realize that most professionals (teachers, therapists, doctors, etc) are mandatory reporters, meaning if they suspect abuse they have to report it to the state. What happens if the child lies or exaggerates during therapy? Are mandatory reporters required to report all stories told to them during therapy?

Thanks for sharing any experiences you have.
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I don’t know the answer, but with a violent child that’s 10 (!), I think the need to get outside help outweighs the risk. This could easily turn into a very scary situation at home without help. And even with help, it could be the early stage of something very bad.

Just choose the therapist very carefully.

If it’s financially feasible (or if there’s a scholarship available), I’m a big fan of therapeutic horse riding. Yoga might also be calming. Swimming, too.

She’s getting to the age where extracurriculars can be a lifesaver. If the kid hates mom and dad but still loves their instrument or sport, they have a good chance of coming safely through the tween/teen years.

I also often recommend Howard Glasser’s Transforming the Difficult Child as well as Karen Pryor’s Don’t Shoot the Dog!

Best wishes to everybody!
 
Was the child recently adopted or was it an infant adoption?

Does the person have a pediatrician recommend a therapist?

My son is in therapy for anxiety. In our case the therapist works with us as a family, and he normally has one of us or both at the session.

That’s our experience so far.
 
nodito said:
I’m curious as to how this would play out.

A close family member wants to seek therapy for her adopted daughter, who is 10. The daughter, although very intelligent, seems to be lacking in emotional maturity and social skills. The daughter can be violent (biting, scratching, etc). She’s also prone to making up and embellishing stories. Mom raised several biological children who are now successful adults but is having a lot of difficulty with this child. She tells me there’s a lot of arguing in their house and is hoping a therapist can provide them both with coping strategies and perspective.

I realize that most professionals (teachers, therapists, doctors, etc) are mandatory reporters, meaning if they suspect abuse they have to report it to the state. What happens if the child lies or exaggerates during therapy? Are mandatory reporters required to report all stories told to them during therapy?

Thanks for sharing any experiences you have.
Click to expand...
From that behavior, the child sounds like a textbook sociopath. This child needs counseling and help. The risks associated with the child lying are far outweighed by the fact that this child needs help, badly.

If she does lie, there will be no physical evidence to support her claims, and they should be dismissed.

Please encourage the parents to get this child counseling.
 
The child should see a psychiatrist. It may be of organic nature—and have a biological component – a psychiatrist will be able to help with this.

Certain mentally ill persons make up stories and it iis part of the illness. A good psychologist or psychiatrist would know this, and it would help with diagnoses and treatment.

Your friend should seek treatment mainly for the child’s wellbeing. The doctors will be able to have a record of the illness if the child tells a false story to a school official or someone else reports this.
 
ProdglArchitect said:
From that behavior, the child sounds like a textbook sociopath. This child needs counseling and help. The risks associated with the child lying are far outweighed by the fact that this child needs help, badly.

If she does lie, there will be no physical evidence to support her claims, and they should be dismissed.

Please encourage the parents to get this child counseling.
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It could be a lot of different things (maybe even multiple things). The violence, immaturity, and social stuff sounds autistic, but the lying doesn’t. (There are autistic children that are deceitful, but the stereotypical autistic child is painfully honest.)

A psych evaluation could also be a good thing.
 
Xantippe said:
It could be a lot of different things (maybe even multiple things). The violence, immaturity, and social stuff sounds autistic, but the lying doesn’t. (There are autistic children that are deceitful, but the stereotypical autistic child is painfully honest.)

A psych evaluation could also be a good thing.
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I know it can be several things, it’s just that that particular combination sounds like sociopathic behavior. I agree, a full psych evaluation is in order.
 
It goes without saying that a 10 year old should not be biting and scratching by this age. I would tell the mother to be at peace if she is anxious about going to a therapist. They are going to want to hear from teachers, coaches, etc. what the problem behaviors are, and lying or exaggerating stories are bound to come up. It sounds as if this mother has tried different methods on her own and has been unsuccessful. She needs some support and a plan to implement to turn that ship around. I would definitely encourage her to see a therapist.
 
I agree with those who believe these symptoms require professional help until diagnosed otherwise. These problems go beyond the demands of normal parenting. As for the fear of unsubstantiated accusations, withholding psychiatric care will not prevent those. What are you going to do, keep the child from contact with all mandatory reporters? Oh,* that *will make her made-up stories seem implausible!!

I’d be in contact with the agency that placed the child, in order to get every record possible released to the psychiatrist (IOW: independently of the parent’s reports). After that, research local therapists and get something going. I would not leap to the conclusion that the child has an antisocial personality disorder, but I would certainly take that possibility into consideration. Hope for the best, but be prepared for worst. This child needs some help, that is for certain.
 
ProdglArchitect said:
From that behavior, the child sounds like a textbook sociopath. This child needs counseling and help. The risks associated with the child lying are far outweighed by the fact that this child needs help, badly.

If she does lie, there will be no physical evidence to support her claims, and they should be dismissed.

Please encourage the parents to get this child counseling.
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I second this. Also, the child is lying and embellishing stories, but it isn’t uncommon for sociopathic individuals to actually injure themselves to reinforce a story. This doesn’t sound like one of those things that just gets better on its own. She needs to see a psychiatrist.
 
Kurisu35712 said:
I second this. Also, the child is lying and embellishing stories, but it isn’t uncommon for sociopathic individuals to actually injure themselves to reinforce a story. This doesn’t sound like one of those things that just gets better on its own. She needs to see a psychiatrist.
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I don’t disagree, and yet we all know these are things that require a professional diagnosis. Just as a UTI can make an older person seem demented, there are other problems that can make a child act out like a person possessed. This child may have sexual or other abuse in her past. The only thing for sure is that these aren’t the kind of symptoms that can be safely ignored. This child could be a danger to herself or others. She ought to get help, as soon as possible.
 
ProdglArchitect said:
From that behavior, the child sounds like a textbook sociopath. This child needs counseling and help. The risks associated with the child lying are far outweighed by the fact that this child needs help, badly.
Click to expand...
It’s interesting, that’s not my impression at all, and perhaps I overemphasized the lying part.

The daughter behaves more like a preschooler than anything else. I have a four year old son and they seem so similar to me (except my son doesn’t usually hit unless he’s very very angry, and even then he’s getting better). She’s doesn’t seem to read social cues well, but part of the reason they are just now looking in to help is that some of the behavior seems normal for younger children. My preschooler son will something make up stories just for fun (We were told, for example, after the first day of preschool that the teacher wouldn’t let him in the classroom all day so he just played in the hallway. I was in the hallway that day for parent orientation and kept peaking in to watch him play with cars and read books in the classroom).

I was just curious how by-the-book mandatory reporters have to be; whether they’re allowed to try to size up the situation and judge whether the child may be embellishing or not giving the full story of if they are required by law to file a report with DCF is the child says something like, “Then mom hit me.”
 
Therapists are trained to know when a child is lying.

Your friend should discuss this with the pediatrician to get advice on if the severity warrants therapy. She should not handle this alone, as her child needs a professional to diagnose this–it may be within normal range but you never know.

Edited to add: also if your friend withholds medical treatment for fear of being falsely accused, it may be considered negligent.
 
nodito said:
It’s interesting, that’s not my impression at all, and perhaps I overemphasized the lying part.

The daughter behaves more like a preschooler than anything else. I have a four year old son and they seem so similar to me (except my son doesn’t usually hit unless he’s very very angry, and even then he’s getting better). She’s doesn’t seem to read social cues well, but part of the reason they are just now looking in to help is that some of the behavior seems normal for younger children. My preschooler son will something make up stories just for fun (We were told, for example, after the first day of preschool that the teacher wouldn’t let him in the classroom all day so he just played in the hallway. I was in the hallway that day for parent orientation and kept peaking in to watch him play with cars and read books in the classroom).
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My oldest child is on the autism spectrum and one of the things that probably delayed a diagnosis was the fact that a lot of her autistic behaviors closely resembled the toddler behaviors that I had read about (for instance, ritualism and rigidity and tantrums). However, those behaviors lingered with her way past what they would have in other children.
 
Xantippe said:
My oldest child is on the autism spectrum and one of the things that probably delayed a diagnosis was the fact that a lot of her autistic behaviors closely resembled the toddler behaviors that I had read about (for instance, ritualism and rigidity and tantrums). However, those behaviors lingered with her way past what they would have in other children.
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After reading the OP’s last post I thought of the autism spectrum also.

If a parent brings a child to a professional for treatment, counselor, psychiatrist, pediatrician and so on, they will evaluate all information to determine if a child is abused. It’s not typically the first thing they jump to.
 
Horton said:
After reading the OP’s last post I thought of the autism spectrum also.

If a parent brings a child to a professional for treatment, counselor, psychiatrist, pediatrician and so on, they will evaluate all information to determine if a child is abused. It’s not typically the first thing they jump to.
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The possibility of undetected abuse is more of a suspicion when the behavior is a total regression from more age-appropriate behavior. (I thought the child was either a recent addition to the family or else had just begun to exhibit these behaviors.)

These are all questions for a specialist, rather than being in the realm of a typical “parenting issue,” because of the age of the child and the severity of the acting out.
 
mommy_k said:
Edited to add: also if your friend withholds medical treatment for fear of being falsely accused, it may be considered negligent.
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The girls sees a pediatrician regularly, and is also in a social skills group at school hosted by the school counselor and also receiving OT. Mom’s not avoiding all mandatory reporters, she just worried that in the context of seeking therapy to specifically address the arguing at home, that it could cause problems.
 
nodito said:
The girls sees a pediatrician regularly, and is also in a social skills group at school hosted by the school counselor and also receiving OT. Mom’s not avoiding all mandatory reporters, she just worried that in the context of seeking therapy to specifically address the arguing at home, that it could cause problems.
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That’s very good about the social skills group.
 
nodito said:
It’s interesting, that’s not my impression at all, and perhaps I overemphasized the lying part.

The daughter behaves more like a preschooler than anything else. I have a four year old son and they seem so similar to me (except my son doesn’t usually hit unless he’s very very angry, and even then he’s getting better). She’s doesn’t seem to read social cues well, but part of the reason they are just now looking in to help is that some of the behavior seems normal for younger children. My preschooler son will something make up stories just for fun (We were told, for example, after the first day of preschool that the teacher wouldn’t let him in the classroom all day so he just played in the hallway. I was in the hallway that day for parent orientation and kept peaking in to watch him play with cars and read books in the classroom).

I was just curious how by-the-book mandatory reporters have to be; whether they’re allowed to try to size up the situation and judge whether the child may be embellishing or not giving the full story of if they are required by law to file a report with DCF is the child says something like, “Then mom hit me.”
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The specifics of mandatory reporting vary by state. In my state, you can be prosecuted if you don’t report any claim of abuse, no matter how unlikely it is.
 
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