Marital sexual relations

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Blessed11

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My wife and I are devout Catholics in our late 50’s. During sexual relations, if the male ejaculates outside of the vagina by an intentional act, is this a sin. If so, is it a mortal or venial sin?
 
Yes. Grave matter.

Birth Control " In Humanae Vitae , Pope Paul VI stated, “[W]e must once again declare that the direct interruption of the generative process already begun, and, above all, directly willed and procured abortion, even if for therapeutic reasons, are to be absolutely excluded as licit means of regulating birth. Equally to be excluded, as the teaching authority of the Church has frequently declared, is direct sterilization, whether perpetual or temporary, whether of the man or of the woman. Similarly excluded is every action which, either in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible” (HV 14).

This was reiterated in the Catechism of the Catholic Church : “[E]very action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible is intrinsically evil” (CCC 2370)."(Bold emphasis is mine).
 
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If it’s done on purpose it’s a sin.

It constitutes grave matter which means that if you had full knowledge (knew it was a sin) and consent (willed to do it/did it on purpose). It would be a mortal sin. Only you can decide if those two additional conditions were met.

If you have any more questions you should confess it just to be safe and then ask the priest’s advice.
 
The marital act needs to finish properly. That is ejaculation in the intended way. If an “accident” happens then that is not a sinful act.

I would suggest reading the Catechism to identify the difference between mortal and venial sin.

It would be grave matter, it would have to be deliberate, and you would have to know of the sinful act.

Those are the three criteria for mortal sin. Since it would be grave matter to deliberately frustrate the act in an unnatural way, only you can decide if the other two criteria are met.

Why would someone want to end a marital act in a false way? Isn’t that disrespectful to your marriage and God?
 
Well, it is definitely wrong. But your terminology might not be correct.
 
No, it.is actually the correct terminology to what the OP described.
 
I actually think that’s a great idea! Catholicism has many rules about sexual relations that are permitted or denied to the Catholic and judging by the frequent questions here, many are confused.

A written handbook explaining them and why would be very helpful as it is difficult for many to ask. Should they remain ignorant of the Catholic view of sexuality and be led to sin in ignorance?
 
This is a very difficult concept for folks to follow, especially in this post-60s sexual revolution world.

The husband must finish the act inside of his wife. Traditional commentary by many Fathers and saints prohibits any form of oral sex regardless if it is foreplay or the intention of relations.
 
Actually, the Church has very few rules about sexual activities. And that’s a good thing, which I’ve posted before. The Church has enough wisdom to not wade into the details of people’s sex lives.

You can imagine the tens of thousands of pages of detailed argumentation that it would require.
 
Jackie Francois Angel - Dating 101 (2019 Steubenville Main Campus 5)

“…a mans semen, a husband’s semen needs to end up and his wife’s vagina…”
“…oral sex within marriage, is not okay. If, oral stimulation in marriage is okay if it leads to the consummation of sex … anal sex at all, if semen ends up anywhere, again this is not just a case of plumbing…”
If this was OK to say to a room of high school students at a Steubenville Conference, I am sure this is permissible to post to CAF.

@(name removed by moderator) Problem solved, everyone knows what is up. Spread this speech everywhere. Those who marry young will now know.
 
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I have not seen the videos above but just to be perfectly clear .
  1. man receives oral from wife and finishes through intercourse is a sin due to oral activity?
  2. man gives wife oral is a sin because of oral activity?
 
Traditional teaching - and nothing has been written to refute it - condemns any oral sex, sexual aids, manual stimulation, etc. Many try to “loophole” out of this situation by drawing out the definition of “sexual act” to include all sorts of unnatural sexual stimulation methods that take place prior to the man finishing through vaginal intercourse. As if our Lord and Lady would approve of hours long unnatural stimulation, using sex toys, a woman demeaning herself by allowing her husband’s reproductive organ into places it doesn’t belong, etc.
 
If this speech was actually given to a room full of high school students, then it’s a sad state of affairs that Steubenville is considered one of the few remaining “orthodox” Catholic universities.
 
A. Teaching of sexual morals for the married is lacking and it results in people going to hell.
B. Someone must teach this.
C. This talk
∴
A^B ➡️ C
 
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Yes. It’s called onanism, for Onan, son of Judah.

And Juda took a wife for Her his firstborn, whose name was Thamar. [7]And Her, the firstborn of Juda, was wicked in the sight of the Lord: and was slain by him. [8] Juda, therefore said to Onan his son: Go in to thy brother’s wife and marry her, that thou mayst raise seed to thy brother. [9] He knowing that the children should not be his, when he went in to his brother’s wife, spilled his seed upon the ground, lest children should be born in his brother’s name. [10] And therefore the Lord slew him, because he did a detestable thing.
 
The post said the talk was given to high school students, not married couples.
 
I disagree.

Today the media etc are much more open in describing and discussing details of sexual acts than they were when I was young and got married.

I don’t think the idea of intentionally ejaculating in this way would even have occurred to me at the time. But with the media so openly promoting it, the Catholic Church needs to take some counter measures and clearly state, even to those already married, that no.
 
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Traditional teaching - and nothing has been written to refute it - condemns any oral sex, sexual aids, manual stimulation, etc.
Is this really so?

I’m reaching the age where, to put this in a delicate way because I know there may be young people reading, well, I’m reaching an age where the male sexual organ doesn’t respond as well as it used to and some manual stimulation is necessary to even get started …

So that’s a no go?
 
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That is correct. The orgasm works by peristalsis and encourages the uptake of semen into the cervix . Which imo proves that contraception was never meant to be practised because the design of the body is pro life.
 
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