Marriage and Contraception

[Habesha]

Say a couple gets married and they don’t want to get pregnant straight away. What are they supposed to use to make sure a pregnancy does not occur? Most couples don’t want to have children straight away after getting married. I know contraception is not allowed in the Catholic Church, but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

I hope I can be enlightened on this. Thank you.

 

[puzzleannie]

Say a couple gets married and they don’t want to get pregnant straight away,

I know contraception is not allowed in the Catholic Church, but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

I hope I can be enlightened on this. Thank you.

and no where does the Catholic Church teach that a woman has to be a baby machine. What she does teach is that children are the good of marriage and procreation its natural reason for existence along with unity of the spouses. You left somebody out of the equation, the man, he is not intended to be a sex machine, either.

this couple has two choices, refrain from marital relations entirely, or refrain from marital relations during the wife’s fertile period, which can be determined quite accurately combining tools provided by medical science such as ovulation predictors, with any of the proven natural family planning methods.

I don’t know that "most couples don’t want to have children right away but it true it begs the question, why on earth did they get married?

 

[Tantum_ergo]

Say a couple gets married and they don’t want to get pregnant straight away. What are they supposed to use to make sure a pregnancy does not occur? Most couples don’t want to have children straight away after getting married. I know contraception is not allowed in the Catholic Church, but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

I hope I can be enlightened on this. Thank you.

Artificial contraception is not permitted. There is nothing wrong with what is sometimes referred to as ‘periodic continence’, used in NFP (Natural Family Planning).

Heck, even in the Stone Age it was known that women were not fertile every single day of the month. Of course, we have a lot more ‘technology’ available today so that we can chart our temperature and know (at least, the majority of women can) ovulation dates in a month and the days that surround it.

It’s not as though you’re ‘never’ having sex you know. And since you are open to life if it happens, you’re honoring God’s gifts in the reason that He made us ‘male and female’.

BTW, it is a little offensive to equate women as ‘baby machines.’ I mean, the MAN is just as necessary but you’re not pointing out HIM as the ‘baby machine’ even though SHE won’t have a baby without him.

Considering that in many countries the reproduction has now fallen BELOW a replacement rate, those countries actually NEED more children. Too bad humanity seems to go to extremes, either contracepting itself out of existence or ignoring God’s own wisdom by which He made women to have a reproductive cycle which could be intelligently and honorably used to help ‘plan’ a family. Too bad we have one group which looks on babies as ‘punishments and burdens’ and another group which looks on women as objects and babies as labor. . .and an all-too-small group (those of us Catholics and some non-Catholics too) who are trying to demonstrate that God did not ‘demand’ either of those two extremes from His people. . .

 

[dnu]

Say a couple gets married and they don’t want to get pregnant straight away. What are they supposed to use to make sure a pregnancy does not occur? Most couples don’t want to have children straight away after getting married. I know contraception is not allowed in the Catholic Church, but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

I hope I can be enlightened on this. Thank you.

Why can’t a couple have baby after baby? There seems to be a great deal of liberal/progressive tone in your voice. The 2,000 year old Christian teaching on this is non-negotiable, never has been, never will be. Even if the Protestant sects want to make up their own ideas as they go along and say contraception is ok, it never was, isn’t, and never will be to those who truly put their life in the hands of God and trust only him with their bodies and lives.

 

[Rence]

Say a couple gets married and they don’t want to get pregnant straight away. What are they supposed to use to make sure a pregnancy does not occur? Most couples don’t want to have children straight away after getting married. I know contraception is not allowed in the Catholic Church, but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

I hope I can be enlightened on this. Thank you.

You can use Natural Family Planning to space out or delay pregnancy. Here’s some information: nfpandmore.org/ Gone are the days of the ol “rhythm” method. We know more about our physiology today and NFP encompasses a few different methods that you can use alone or in combination with each other. It would really be to your benefit to research the different methods.

Women, though designed to have babies, are not designed to be perpetually pregnant. So the Church allows NFP to space out pregnanacies. And I agree, not everyone wants to conceive on their honeymoon You’re probably settling into your new life, paying bills, etc.

What the Church teaches about having children was discussed in Humanae Vitae, an encyclical, which if you’re interested in reading can be found here:
vatican.va/holy_father/paul_vi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-vi_enc_25071968_humanae-vitae_en.html

Here’s an excerpt from it:

With regard to physical, economic, psychological and social conditions, responsible parenthood is exercised by those who prudently and generously decide to have more children, and by those who, for serious reasons and with due respect to moral precepts, decide not to have additional children for either a certain or an indefinite period of time.

And

there are well-grounded reasons for spacing births, arising from the physical or psychological condition of husband or wife, or from external circumstances, the Church teaches that married people may then take advantage of the natural cycles immanent in the reproductive system and engage in marital intercourse only during those times that are infertile, thus controlling birth in a way which does not in the least offend the moral principles

And as always, if you have any questions, I can’t recommend enough how useful it is to consult with your priest

 

[Bookcat]

From the Compendium of the Catechism:

1. When is it moral to regulate births?

2368-2369
2399

The regulation of births, which is an aspect of responsible fatherhood and motherhood, is objectively morally acceptable when it is pursued by the spouses without external pressure; when it is practiced not out of selfishness but for serious reasons; and with methods that conform to the objective criteria of morality, that is, periodic continence and use of the infertile periods.

1. What are immoral means of birth control?

2370-2372

Every action - for example, direct sterilization or contraception - is intrinsically immoral which (either in anticipation of the conjugal act, in its accomplishment or in the development of its natural consequences) proposes, as an end or as a means, to hinder procreation.

1. Why are artificial insemination and artificial fertilization immoral?

2373-2377

They are immoral because they dissociate procreation from the act with which the spouses give themselves to each other and so introduce the domination of technology over the origin and destiny of the human person. Furthermore, heterologous insemination and fertilization with the use of techniques that involve a person other than the married couple infringe upon the right of a child to be born of a father and mother known to him, bound to each other by marriage and having the exclusive right to become parents only through each another.

1. How should children be considered?

2378

A child is a gift of God, the supreme gift of marriage. There is no such thing as a right to have children (e.g. “a child at any cost”). But a child does have the right to be the fruit of the conjugal act of its parents as well as the right to be respected as a person from the moment of conception.

 

[Habesha]

and no where does the Catholic Church teach that a woman has to be a baby machine. What she does teach is that children are the good of marriage and procreation its natural reason for existence along with unity of the spouses. You left somebody out of the equation, the man, he is not intended to be a sex machine, either.

this couple has two choices, refrain from marital relations entirely, or refrain from marital relations during the wife’s fertile period, which can be determined quite accurately combining tools provided by medical science such as ovulation predictors, with any of the proven natural family planning methods.

I don’t know that "most couples don’t want to have children right away but it true it begs the question, why on earth did they get married?

I’ve heard of natural family planning before, but never really understood it. I’ll look into it, thank you.

You can’t have child after child. You need spacing periods. Maybe some people only want to have one child or two.

 

[Habesha]

Artificial contraception is not permitted. There is nothing wrong with what is sometimes referred to as ‘periodic continence’, used in NFP (Natural Family Planning).

Heck, even in the Stone Age it was known that women were not fertile every single day of the month. Of course, we have a lot more ‘technology’ available today so that we can chart our temperature and know (at least, the majority of women can) ovulation dates in a month and the days that surround it.

It’s not as though you’re ‘never’ having sex you know. And since you are open to life if it happens, you’re honoring God’s gifts in the reason that He made us ‘male and female’.

BTW, it is a little offensive to equate women as ‘baby machines.’ I mean, the MAN is just as necessary but you’re not pointing out HIM as the ‘baby machine’ even though SHE won’t have a baby without him.

Considering that in many countries the reproduction has now fallen BELOW a replacement rate, those countries actually NEED more children. Too bad humanity seems to go to extremes, either contracepting itself out of existence or ignoring God’s own wisdom by which He made women to have a reproductive cycle which could be intelligently and honorably used to help ‘plan’ a family. Too bad we have one group which looks on babies as ‘punishments and burdens’ and another group which looks on women as objects and babies as labor. . .and an all-too-small group (those of us Catholics and some non-Catholics too) who are trying to demonstrate that God did not ‘demand’ either of those two extremes from His people. . .

Sorry if I sounded disrespectful. Thanks for your advice.

 

[Habesha]

You can use Natural Family Planning to space out or delay pregnancy. Here’s some information: nfpandmore.org/ Gone are the days of the ol “rhythm” method. We know more about our physiology today and NFP encompasses a few different methods that you can use alone or in combination with each other. It would really be to your benefit to research the different methods.

Women, though designed to have babies, are not designed to be perpetually pregnant. So the Church allows NFP to space out pregnanacies. And I agree, not everyone wants to conceive on their honeymoon You’re probably settling into your new life, paying bills, etc.

What the Church teaches about having children was discussed in Humanae Vitae, an encyclical, which if you’re interested in reading can be found here:
vatican.va/holy_father/paul_vi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-vi_enc_25071968_humanae-vitae_en.html

Here’s an excerpt from it:

And

And as always, if you have any questions, I can’t recommend enough how useful it is to consult with your priest

I looked at the website, but I have no clear understanding on how Natural family planning actually works.

Thanks.

 

[Habesha]

From the Compendium of the Catechism:

1. When is it moral to regulate births?

2368-2369
2399

The regulation of births, which is an aspect of responsible fatherhood and motherhood, is objectively morally acceptable when it is pursued by the spouses without external pressure; when it is practiced not out of selfishness but for serious reasons; and with methods that conform to the objective criteria of morality, that is, periodic continence and use of the infertile periods.

1. What are immoral means of birth control?

2370-2372

Every action - for example, direct sterilization or contraception - is intrinsically immoral which (either in anticipation of the conjugal act, in its accomplishment or in the development of its natural consequences) proposes, as an end or as a means, to hinder procreation.

1. Why are artificial insemination and artificial fertilization immoral?

2373-2377

They are immoral because they dissociate procreation from the act with which the spouses give themselves to each other and so introduce the domination of technology over the origin and destiny of the human person. Furthermore, heterologous insemination and fertilization with the use of techniques that involve a person other than the married couple infringe upon the right of a child to be born of a father and mother known to him, bound to each other by marriage and having the exclusive right to become parents only through each another.

1. How should children be considered?

2378

A child is a gift of God, the supreme gift of marriage. There is no such thing as a right to have children (e.g. “a child at any cost”). But a child does have the right to be the fruit of the conjugal act of its parents as well as the right to be respected as a person from the moment of conception.

Yes I understand that artificial contraception is wrong.

 

[InternetWoman]

I looked at the website, but I have no clear understanding on how Natural family planning actually works.

Thanks.

It’s pretty simple - the couple works to determine when a woman is fertile and then refrains from having sex during that time. In any 28 day period a woman is only fertile for about 7 days.

But don’t forget to keep God in your plans! Remember he wants what is best for you - including the “best” number of children. Since as humans we can’t see the future we need to trust that God (who can see the future) knows much better than we do the number and spacing of our children. That’s why NFP usually includes serious prayer and discernment.

Hope this is helpful.

 

[Tradycja]

but you can’t be an automatic baby machine, just having baby after baby.

And…why not?

 

[mark_a]

I’ve heard of natural family planning before, but never really understood it. I’ll look into it, thank you.

You can’t have child after child. You need spacing periods. Maybe some people only want to have one child or two.

More important than the Church’s teachings on contraception is the teaching that children are a gift from God and we are to be open to and protective of new life.

If one cannot truly accept that children are a gift from God, one cannot accept the Church’s teaching about contraception.

 

[Christopher68]

Why can’t a couple have baby after baby?

Some couples want large families, some don’t. For most couples, it’s a matter of preference as well as economics. This is obviously a question left up to the couples themselves.

 

[InternetWoman]

Some couples want large families, some don’t. For most couples, it’s a matter of preference as well as economics. This is obviously a question left up to the couples themselves.

Where is God in this? Don’t we have an obligation to have children when and how many he wants? Isn’t that part of being his follower? That’s a scary thing to say, I know, but how could we say we are followers of Christ if we deny him something as central as our fertility?

 

[Christopher68]

Where is God in this? Don’t we have an obligation to have children when and how many he wants? Isn’t that part of being his follower? That’s a scary thing to say, I know, but how could we say we are followers of Christ if we deny him something as central as our fertility?

With regard to the size of someone else’s family, why is that a concern of yours?

 

[davidv]

With regard to the size of someone else’s family, why is that a concern of yours?

If we are following Jesus, we must obey His commands. He said we are to love our neighbor. This means our neighbors’ salvation ought to be one of our concerns. None of this posters comments specified the size of someone else’s family. They simply pointed out that God’s desires need to be factored into that decision.

 

[Christopher68]

If we are following Jesus, we must obey His commands. He said we are to love our neighbor. This means our neighbors’ salvation ought to be one of our concerns. None of this posters comments specified the size of someone else’s family. They simply pointed out that God’s desires need to be factored into that decision.

Loving thy neighbor is one thing. Taking too much interest in the personal and private decisions of those you don’t even know is something altogether different. There is much good that one can do in the name of loving thy neighbor that doesn’t fall into this second category.

 

[davidv]

Loving thy neighbor is one thing. Taking too much interest in the personal and private decisions of those you don’t even know is something altogether different. There is much good that one can do in the name of loving thy neighbor that doesn’t fall into this second category.

I agree. But none of the second category is being done on this thread.

 

[Scoobyshme]

Think about this…

Today, in a hospital near you, a little baby is going to be born. The life of that baby began about nine months ago. One day, that hospital won’t be there, nor the city in which it operates, or the country. Maybe not even the earth. But that little baby will be alive! He will live forever!

What the contracepting couple are telling God is this: “We know, that it may be Your will that by this act a person who will live forever may be created. We know this may be Your will. But WE WON’T LET YOU DO IT!”

How would you like to have to explain that to God when you are judged?!