Marriage before RCIA

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Student09

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I’m getting married this summer, and neither my fiance nor I have ever been baptized, so our only option - unless one of us gets baptized in the next few months - is to get married by a judge. We would have a ceremony with family present, but the officiant would not be ordained and it would not be a church wedding. 😦 I’m hoping to start RCIA in the fall, and my fiance is also considering doing so. If we get married by a judge, and then one or both of us is baptized and received into the Catholic Church, would our marriage be considered sacramental according to the Church?
 
Student09 said:
I’m getting married this summer, and neither my fiance nor I have ever been baptized, so our only option - unless one of us gets baptized in the next few months - is to get married by a judge. We would have a ceremony with family present, but the officiant would not be ordained and it would not be a church wedding. 😦 I’m hoping to start RCIA in the fall, and my fiance is also considering doing so. If we get married by a judge, and then one or both of us is baptized and received into the Catholic Church, would our marriage be considered sacramental according to the Church?
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Have you spoken to a priest about this? Also, if you really want to be married in the church, why not wait until you are both baptised?
 
If neither of you are baptized Catholics, you are not legally obliged to observe the Catholic form of marriage. If there would otherwise be no impediments to this marriage (neither of you has been previously married and divorced, etc.), there should be no obstacle for you to both enter the Church as a married couple, having your marriage blessed by the Church at the same time. If you decide to be baptized and enter the Church but your spouse does not, your marriage would be recognized by the Church as valid but not sacramental. I would recommend that you discuss your plans beforehand with the priest who will be preparing you to enter the Church.

God bless you both.
 
Student09 said:
I’m getting married this summer, and neither my fiance nor I have ever been baptized, so our only option - unless one of us gets baptized in the next few months - is to get married by a judge. We would have a ceremony with family present, but the officiant would not be ordained and it would not be a church wedding. 😦 I’m hoping to start RCIA in the fall, and my fiance is also considering doing so. If we get married by a judge, and then one or both of us is baptized and received into the Catholic Church, would our marriage be considered sacramental according to the Church?
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Your marriage would be valid. Since neither of you is baptized, it is called a natural marriage. When you enter the Church, your marriage is 100% valid. It does not need convalidation or blessing. Non-Catholics marry validly when they marry civilly. (I presume there are no impediments, such as prior marriages).

If one of you enters the Church and becomes baptized, your marriage is still a natural marriage. If you both get baptized together, or one and then the other follows later, your marriage becomes a Sacrament at the moment your are both baptized. Baptism is the gateway to all other Sacraments.

If you cannot wait until after you enter the Church, there are many non-denominational minister who will perform marriages, even if you are not baptized. Not all denomination see baptism as necessary. Just a thought, if you do want a minister and not just a JP.

I suggest you talk to the priest at the parish where you will be received into the Church and ask his opinion and what options he suggests.
 
Have you spoken to a priest about this? Also, if you really want to be married in the church, why not wait until you are both baptized?

We have been engaged for a year and all our relatives and friends are planning to come out this summer, so we don’t want to delay the marriage any longer.

Thanks everyone for the information.
 
Just a note. If either you or your fiance have been married before, please talk with a priest now.
 
Fortunately, neither of us has ever been married. I’m only 20!
 
Then there should be no problem whatsoever. But still talk to your priest beforehand. He can help you prepare for your marriage, even if the wedding itself will not be a church ceremony.
 
All you need in order to have a “Church wedding” is to be accepted into the Order of Catechumens. Only the baptized get a Nuptual Mass, but Canonically, Catechumens are entitled to have a exchange of vows in a church witnessed by a priest or deacon. So, if one or both of you are in the RCIA, and have moved past the inquiry stage into the catechumenate, that is certainly an option for you.

As others have recommended, talk to a priest about it.
 
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