Marriage between different faiths

[Joy18]

Hi…I’m a Lutheran dating a Catholic, and we’re starting to talk about marriage. We both have a very strong belief in God, and we pray together and attend each other’s churches together, because both of our religions are important to us. However, our families seem to be having a hard time with us dating. If we were to get married and have children, I know my family would want the children to be raised Lutheran, while his would want them to be raised Catholic. I’ve been to several websites concerning this issue, and most say that it is now up to the couple to decide how the children will be raised. In the past, the couple had to sign an agreement promising to raise their children Catholic, but now the Catholic must verbally say he or she will share the Catholic faith with the children, and the couple decides the rest. Is this accurate, and what exactly does it mean? Could our children be raised in either faith? Both of us are very committed to our religions, but we are also committed to each other and know that with compromise, we can work this out. Ideally, we would like our children to learn about both of our faiths. Thanks for your help!

Joy

 

[Pug]

Joy,

I’m not an expert, but I believe the Catholic party to the marriage must promise to do his best to raise the children Catholic. The Protestant need not so promise, but must be informed of the promise. How that would work out in the situation of a specific couple, I don’t know. I am a Catholic married to a Catholic. Maybe it would be best to talk to both a Catholic priest and a Lutheran pastor to get an idea of what would work. You each could have different precise details in mind, and it would be a good idea to get them fully on the table.

Just an example, will the child be receiving communion in either church? Things like this.

Best of luck!

Oh, here is a cut from the relevant part of canon law.

Can. 1125 The local ordinary can grant a permission of this kind if there is a just and reasonable cause. He is not to grant it unless the following conditions have been fulfilled:

1/ the Catholic party is to declare that he or she is prepared to remove dangers of defecting from the faith and is to make a sincere promise to do all in his or her power so that all offspring are baptized and brought up in the Catholic Church;

2/ the other party is to be informed at an appropriate time about the promises which the Catholic party is to make, in such a way that it is certain that he or she is truly aware of the promise and obligation of the Catholic party;

3/ both parties are to be instructed about the purposes and essential properties of marriage which neither of the contracting parties is to exclude.