Marriage in the Resurrection? What did Jesus actually say

[Tony]

According to this article, “Marriage” that the Sadducees were talking about in their question, and that Jesus referred to in his reply, is not “marriage” as we understand that relationship today.
“Marriage” as understood in biblical times is not the same thing as “marriage” as understood in today’s Western society. Marriage was seen as a relationship between two inherently unequal people, in contrast to today’s Western view of marriage as a relationship between equals.​

If the Sadducees had asked Jesus, “Will there be marriage in the resurrection?” then the common interpretation of Jesus’ reply would be well justified. But that isn’t what happened.
They didn’t really care whose wife the hypothetical woman would be—they were trying to disprove the resurrection itself. Thus Jesus’ response must be considered in the context of affirming the resurrection.

The Mosaic law they reference (found in Deuteronomy 25:5–10) was not given primarily as a way to care for the bereaved woman. It may have had this side effect, but the text is explicit that the intention was to preserve the name of the dead brother. The woman was used as a commodity to accomplish this purpose.

The Sadducees’ story, then, is a sorrowful one, of a woman who has been passed from man to man, dutifully attempting to carry out the will of these men. And then they want to know, “Whose property will she be in the resurrection?”

It is to this women-as-property view of marriage that Jesus responds. “For when they will rise from the dead,” he says, “they neither marry, nor are given in marriage”

Note carefully the two parts Jesus specifies. He does not say that people will no longer marry (though some translations unfortunately abbreviate it this way).

Rather, Jesus says, “they neither marry,” that is, “men will no longer take possession of women,” and then, “nor are given in marriage,” that is, “women will no longer be given as possessions to men.”

The ancient Syriac Peshitta version of the Bible makes this distinction even more apparent. “They do not take wives, nor are wives given to husbands” (Murdock’s translation).

Jesus does not say that marriage itself will be done away with; he says that there will be no more giving or taking of humans as property.

Will there be marriage in the resurrection? That depends on what you mean by marriage. If by marriage you mean humans taking ownership of other humans, then no, there will be none of that.

Additionally, I don’t believe that marriage vows made for this lifetime are binding for the next life. Those who do not wish to continue their marriage will be under no obligation to do so.

However, if any individuals should mutually decide to pursue an egalitarian partnership throughout eternity, I see no reason to think that this would not be allowed. No doubt the dynamics of the relationship will be different on many levels, but I believe that God will honor such a commitment.

No Marriage In The Resurrection? Here’s What Jesus Really Said | Chuck McKnight

 

[Zaccheus]

Marriage means marriage. The ancient world’s view of marriage may be skewed from our point of view, the treatment of wives at the time may have been-- and often was-- unjust by our standards.
In another passage Jesus said “Moses permitted divorce by reason of the hardness of your hearts, but in the beginning it was not so.”
And Jesus said: “Let a man leave father and mother and cleave unto his wife, and they shall be two in one flesh.” That was how Jesus saw marriage.

Then in answer to the Sadducees, He said “In heaven they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are as the angels.”

Jesus was not saying “Your view of marriage is corrupted, and in heaven they won’t do it that way.”
Jesus was saying “In heaven they are like the angels in this (and angels do not marry)”

So no. There is no marriage in heaven. I have no doubt that those who were husband and wife on earth will love each other still in heaven; but it will be the kind of love with which the saints and angels love each other, not what we know on earth as marriage.

 

[Darryl_B]

I always imagined I would pass my wife and she would say “Hello Brother” and I would would cordially respond “Hello Sister” in a monotonistic robotic way as we had all become zombies, the old school zombies where we have no emotion but a vague recollection that we might actually have had some beautiful meaningful love which is now surpassed by empty disassociation.

 

[Zaccheus]

No. No, it will not be like that. In heaven our love will be perfected. We will love much more intensely, much more powerfully, in a way we can’t on earth.
You will meet your wife and your love for her will be a perfect thing you wouldn’t have the strength to sustain here on earth. It is our earthly love that will seem zombie-like by comparison.

 

[VanitasVanitatum]

Rather, Jesus says, “they neither marry,” that is, “men will no longer take possession of women,” and then, “nor are given in marriage,” that is, “women will no longer be given as possessions to men.”

Sounds like a stretch. This stopped happening even on Earth. Also he says you are supposed to look at the context of him going against the Saducees claims that there is no ressurrection, but treating people as property is a completely different topic.

 

[Benadam]

but those who are considered worthy of a place in that age and in the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage. 36 Indeed they cannot die anymore, because they are like angels and are children of God,
Bolded is the key to this teaching.
We have sex because we die. We marry to reproduce because we die. No more dying no reason to reproduce our kind.

 

[fisherman_carl]

In heaven there is no sexual reproduction and thus marriage as we know it now will not exist. Instead we will be “married” to God and be part of the wedding supper of the Lamb. This life is about learning to make a gift of ourselves to God. Some can learn to make a gift of themselves through marriage by giving themselves to another.

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

However, if any individuals should mutually decide to pursue an egalitarian partnership throughout eternity, I see no reason to think that this would not be allowed

I’m not sure human relationships will work like that in the afterlife.

Our friendships on earth are based on things such as mutual liking (but in Heaven we will “like” everybody, with perfect love), proximity (but in Heaven we won’t be separated by distance) and a type of tribalism, whereby some people are “in” and others are “out”, and choosing a “best friend” is very important. Partly it’s because our brains can’t accommodate close relationships with endless numbers of people (not to mention the time needed to invest in relationships). But in Heaven none of this will be an issue.

Plus, we won’t be trying to jockey for position and impress and one-up each other.

So take all these earthly traits out of human relationships and you’ll wind up with something very different from anything we know.

 

[Irishmom2]

Wow, that sounds pretty sad.

 

[fisherman_carl]

It’s inhuman actually. In heaven we will not be like zombies. We will be more alive than we are now, and more capable of loving others includes any former spouse.

 

[Gorgias]

Jesus does not say that marriage itself will be done away with; he says that there will be no more giving or taking of humans as property.

That’s a rather novel interpretation! For it to hold, you’d have to show that “neither marry nor are given in marriage” wasn’t the standard way to refer to marriage. If you can’t, then you’re taking an idiom and forcing a literal interpretation of it, and doing harm to the intent of the statement in the process!

(It’s kinda like saying “when St Paul talks about ‘girding loins’, we must understand him to mean that he’s only telling us to prepare for literal martial war, not ‘be prepared and ready to face evil’”.)

Will there be marriage in the resurrection? That depends on what you mean by marriage. If by marriage you mean humans taking ownership of other humans, then no, there will be none of that.

So… do angels marry? You’re forgetting that part of Jesus’ words.

Additionally, I don’t believe that marriage vows made for this lifetime are binding for the next life.

Well… ok… but that’s what Jesus Himself said, and what Paul affirmed.

Those who do not wish to continue their marriage will be under no obligation to do so.

However, if any individuals should mutually decide to pursue an egalitarian partnership throughout eternity, I see no reason to think that this would not be allowed.

Not only “no obligation”, but also “no possibility.”

No reason for it to be not allowed? You’re missing the whole point of Christian marriage, then. We believe that, in our earthly marriages, we model the relationship in the Trinity. Once we’re in heaven, there’s no longer any need to ‘model’ the unseen – we’re present to it and experiencing it directly!

we have no emotion but a vague recollection that we might actually have had some beautiful meaningful love which is now surpassed by empty disassociation.

Hmm… that doesn’t seem right, either. That would mean that the love you shared had gone away? No…

 

[pnewton]

I heard Peter Kreeft speak about sex in Heaven, and by extension marriage. It was speculative as is pretty much everything is apart from a handful of revealed facts. Even Jesus gave almost no information, as if anyone on this side of the vale could understand. As Catholics, and believers in the resurrection of the body, we know that there are also substantial differences between us and angels. We only know that we do not marry. As far as what other kind of intimacy may exist is speculative. No we do not need to procreate, but there is also no need for sustenance. Yet we know that Jesus still ate to have fellowship with his disciples.

 

[po18guy]

A blog entry made by “hippie heretic”? Avoid this stuff like the plague that it is. We have no need - absolutely none - to look outside the faith for information allegedly about the faith. The faith is not a do-it-yourself project. To know what Jesus really said, we rely, as Jesus taught, upon the Church.

Whoever the author is, they are questioning established truth. Read Genesis 3 once again. “Did God really tell you not to eat of the fruit of the tree in the center of the garden? No, I tell you!”

Who said that?

God is God of simplicity. The evil one introduces complication. Best not to complicate the matter.

 

[fisherman_carl]

Not to mention that the problem still remains for a woman who has had 7 husbands, even if they were ‘egalitarian’ marriages, or equal, which husband would she be married to in heaven?

 

[TheLittleLady]

Not at all. In heaven we will all be perfected in love, our love will encompass every other person in heaven.

 

[The_Old_Maid]

I always imagined I would pass my wife and she would say “Hello Brother” and I would would cordially respond “Hello Sister” in a monotonistic robotic way as we had all become zombies, the old school zombies where we have no emotion but a vague recollection that we might actually have had some beautiful meaningful love which is now surpassed by empty disassociation.

Maybe in the last book of “Left Behind.” (Yes, they wrote a sequel about life on earth, in their opinion, after Jesus comes back. Scroll the whole thing: the quotes are really surprisingly close to what you said.)

But I think Anthony de Stefano (“A Travel Guide to Heaven”) paints a more comforting picture. He suggests,

Now it’s possible to come away from the Scripture just a little upset. After all, what if we like being married? Do all our important relationships, the ones that helped make us who we are, just disappear?

No! Let’s think of a game of tennis. In tennis, the players wear certain uniforms, use certain equipment, and play within a small space by specific rules. When the players leave the court at the end of the day, do they forget they know each other? Or maybe they have a better relationship off the tennis court than they did on it? Think of your close relationships in Heaven like that. Same for you and your Mom, or you and your grandchildren. Good things don’t get smaller in Heaven.

Besides, just because we’ll be amazed at the sight of Jesus doesn’t make Jesus the kind of person who would get petty-jealous if we had any lovingkindness or good feelings for anyone else. Zombies and other monomania attention freaks come from humans, not from our Lord.

 

[Dan_Defender]

So take all these earthly traits out of human relationships and you’ll wind up with something very different from anything we know.

Exactly, marriage does not come to a complete end at death but is transfigured, spiritualized, freed from the limits that mark life on earth.

 

[Darryl_B]

I refused to permit the phrase “til death do us part” enter into my marriage covenant.

 

[tafan2]

Why? Regardless of the exact meaning of Christ’s words in the relevant scripture passages, do you expect you wife to be your lawful wife after one of you dies?

 

[Gorgias]

I refused to permit the phrase “til death do us part” enter into my marriage covenant.

Was it a Catholic ceremony?

In any case, do you expect that this omission would trump even civil law? (I mean, would you expect that, upon the death of one of you, even the state would prohibit a future marriage for the surviving spouse?)