Marriage-premarital problem

[kevin294]

hey everyone !!

if a man and women have a child while they are not married,is this considered a mortal sin by the catholic church!!..also say if the two people decide to get married 1 year or 2 years after the baby is born…would the child then still be considered wrong??
what iam trying to ask is can you ever correct things and make them right by marrying the women…or does the fact allways remain that the child was from before marriage:shrug:
its a weird strange world

kev

 

[Joe_5859]

Welcome to CAF, Kevin!

Having sex outside the confines of Marriage is intrinsically disordered and gravely sinful. If the act is committed with full knowledge and complete consent, then it is a mortal sin.

But God is always willing to forgive us. Those who have committed such a sin simply have to go to Confession to be reconciled with God and the Church.

A child is innocent in all this. Whether a child is conceived in wedlock or out of wedlock, no sin is imputed to the child by virtue of that action of their parents. There is nothing to “correct” in that regard.

 

[puzzleannie]

hey everyone !!

if a man and women have a child while they are not married,is this considered a mortal sin by the catholic church!!..

 

[SonCatcher]

Welcome Kevin.

It is not “having a child” that is sinful. Indeed, children are “good” in that they are creations of God. Children should always be welcomed joyfully, baptized and raised in the Church.

The thing that is mortally sinful is fornication (the non-marital sexual act that includes the possibility of conceiving a child as a consequence).

There are some diocese that will not marry a couple if it is known that the woman is pregnant (since knowledge of pregnancy may inhibit freedom in choosing to marry).

 

[MarisaJean]

I too had this same question before I made my first confession. I understood having a child out of wedlock was a sin and when I talked to my priest about it he explained it to me like this: You are not sorry because God gave you the most precious gift in the world are you? You are not sorry because you have been chosen out of many to be a mother are you? (which of course I said no to) He said you are mearly sorry for the “act” which led you to these things.
So he helped explain to many questions. My advice is to talk to your priest, most are more than willing to talk and help you figure things out or put things into a different perspective than you normally would think of. Good luck with everything…

 

[mikeghiorso]

We cannot change the past. We can only move closer to God. Are you now, by marrying the mother, moving closer to God? It does not change what was done, but it does reorder your life and allow you (both) to move from where you are — to where you should be.

 

[kevin294]

hey guys another interesting question i have is:…is divorce and adultery a bigger sin or lesser sin than having a child out of marriage…and is sex before marraige the same as adultery in marriage…ie…a mortal sin

thanks for all the answers guys…i gota admit some very intelligent people here!!!

 

[SonCatcher]

Fornication and adultery are roughly equivalent. The only meaningful difference between the two sins is whether the person committing it is married.

Again, children are “after the fact” so bearing children it not in itself sinful. If you are a parent, be the best parent you can. If your child was conceived out of wedlock, repent of the sin (fornication or adultery) but still be the best parent you can.

 

[Joe_5859]

The Catholic Church doesn’t generally rank specific sins in some sort of flow-chart fashion. Nonetheless, there are certainly factors that can make some sins more serious than others.

Having a child out of marriage is not the sin. The sin involved is what leads to the child outside of marriage (i.e. fornication). Thus it is inaccurate to call having a child out of marriage “sin”.

I would say that adultery is a more serious sin than fornication. Both are intrinsically disordered and gravely sinful, and both involve a misuse of our sexual faculties, but adultery has the added component of harming a marriage. That makes it more serious.