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Irishmom2
Guest
No, you are not making him that way. Do not take that onto your shoulders. Whenever you feel yourself weakening, think of your son. You need to do what is best and safe for him.
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TheLittleLady
Guest
Protect yourself and your son.
Contact your local women’s crisis center, Catholic Charities, someone who will help you get out and keep you and your child safe.
You are NOT responsible for him. You can give him the name of a near by mental health clinic.
When you leave, work with the courts to make sure he cannot come around you again until certain conditions are met.
This is not a game. For your son’s sake, get safe.
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angel12
Guest
No, it’s not you. It’s his illness. You have to keep reminding yourself of this.
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Dlee
Guest
I agree with @TheLittleLady. Get you and your son away and safe. There is too much at stake here - possible the lives of your entire family.
I know someone who speak to angel too.
I probably have a mental illness such as skizophrenia, or bipolar.
It can be “managed” (not cured, but maintained) with psychiatric aid, drugs and sometimes some hospitalizations.
When such illness is here, it is here for a long time. Be prepared to live the best and the hell.
Of course, he needs to be voluntereed to do it. But for your family future and safety, and for himself, and for the society safety too, it is very important that you speak seriously to him to do a psychiatric evaluation soon. Or ask a third part to convince him.
You can help him, but he have to accept he has a problem that need treatment. And his hallucinations are not God’s gift.
I probably have a mental illness such as skizophrenia, or bipolar.
It can be “managed” (not cured, but maintained) with psychiatric aid, drugs and sometimes some hospitalizations.
When such illness is here, it is here for a long time. Be prepared to live the best and the hell.
Of course, he needs to be voluntereed to do it. But for your family future and safety, and for himself, and for the society safety too, it is very important that you speak seriously to him to do a psychiatric evaluation soon. Or ask a third part to convince him.
You can help him, but he have to accept he has a problem that need treatment. And his hallucinations are not God’s gift.
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It is a common fear of the mental ill persons who refuse to take medications.
It is true that medications may have deep side effects, that can affect his will or his health, but they can help him to stoped being a danger for himself or his family. And it seems there is few to no alternatives if he don’t want to live in psychiatric institution.
Can you been directed to a group of support for mental ill person’s family? Or your husband for a support group for mental ill person that accept to live under treatment?
What do you think of this idea?
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His_helpmeet
Guest
The newer medications aren’t as likely to make him into a “zombie” and his provider also won’t put him on a heavy dose to start. Today it’s more common to start people on a low dose and work them up from there. His provider will be able to help him determine what’s the best option for him.
YOU cannot be responsible for him. He needs to decide to help himself. For you to be solely responsible for his mental health is not only unhealthy for you both, it’s not possible.
If he’s becoming dangerous your best bet is to leave. You might also speak to a doctor and see if he needs to be committed. Depending on your jurisdiction if he’s dangerous they may be able to commit him involuntarily. This would depend on the laws in your area. A doctor would know.
YOU cannot be responsible for him. He needs to decide to help himself. For you to be solely responsible for his mental health is not only unhealthy for you both, it’s not possible.
If he’s becoming dangerous your best bet is to leave. You might also speak to a doctor and see if he needs to be committed. Depending on your jurisdiction if he’s dangerous they may be able to commit him involuntarily. This would depend on the laws in your area. A doctor would know.
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Jessmom24
Guest
Thank you. It is encouraging to know that others see this as not from God. He is so convincing sometimes. I always go back to the fact that a gift from God is positive not scary. His idea of a gift is very scary and not safe.
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Jessmom24
Guest
Thank you. I am going to,try to attend a family support meeting this week. I hope to find other people with similar experiences.
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13pollitos
Guest
I am 100% for the preservation of marriage whenever possible, so please don’t think I am just trying to stir trouble here for your family. Your husband is NOT SAFE to be around your son. Please, please, please get your son to safety. Whenever a person listens to and follows the instructions of the voices they hear (as you stated your husband does), they become untrustworthy and a danger to be around. Coupled with anger issues, no good will come out of this situation. My husband and I have been raising six children because the parent who heard voices became dangerous enough that the other parent finally left. Unfortunately the parent that left did so without the children. When the youngest (very young newborn infant) and one of the older ones were brought to the ER by a neighbor with severe injuries after being locked out of their home in subzero temperatures, the police got involved. I’ve had them ever since. As bad as it was, after talking to the police I realize how lucky the kids were. It not only could have been much worse, it nearly was. The voices were giving her directions in how to rid the children of demons by tossing them into hot oil. Please, please, please—take your son someplace safe. If your husband agrees to (name removed by moderator)atient treatment until he is stable and remains stable for a year post hospitalization, then you can attempt reconciliation.
Yes. Please, please don’t blame yourself for his behavior.
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Godfollower
Guest
It is ABSOLUTELY NOT you making him act that way. It’s him, and it’s his disease. It is NOT you.
Protect your son, and protect yourself. All else is secondary. If his behavior has been so bad that you have cause to fear for your life or your son’s life, then Catholic theology is clear: self-protection (and protection of your child) comes first.
Another idea: perhaps get in touch with the chapelain of a psychiatrichospital in your area.
He will probably better aware of thoses cases, and can be a better advisor than a parish priest.
Hallucinations are not a gift from God. If the revelations are heterodox, or add something new to the Revelation, it cannot be from God. If it is not safe and scary, it is not in the person’s interest (or his relatives).
Even if we can understand than for some people it can be seen as very real, and something that belong to them.
As a chaplain said us, some feel very misunderstood. We can heard them respectfully, but not support their hallucinations.
I pray that you will have the courage to go through with that.
He will probably better aware of thoses cases, and can be a better advisor than a parish priest.
Hallucinations are not a gift from God. If the revelations are heterodox, or add something new to the Revelation, it cannot be from God. If it is not safe and scary, it is not in the person’s interest (or his relatives).
Even if we can understand than for some people it can be seen as very real, and something that belong to them.
As a chaplain said us, some feel very misunderstood. We can heard them respectfully, but not support their hallucinations.
I pray that you will have the courage to go through with that.
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MaryT777
Guest
You MUST keep him away and protect you and your son from him. I grew up with this type of chaos and the chaos itself ruins you for life.
It is not too late for you. Have him committed if possible.
It is not too late for you. Have him committed if possible.
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0Scarlett_nidiyilii
Guest
There’s already good advice here.
I just want to let you know I’m praying for you all…
ray:t2:
ray:t2:
I just want to let you know I’m praying for you all…
ray:t2:ray:t2:
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Jessmom24
Guest
He wanted to come home tonight. I stayed strong. It was so hard. He is hurting. I can’t keep doing this roller coaster with him when he won’t get help. I am praying he will accept help. He was so distraught when I left him tonight. I feel so bad but at the same time glad that I stood my ground. Thank you all for,your prayers.
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angel12
Guest
I know it was very hard, but you absolutely did the right thing.
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Legend
Guest
OP,
You’re doing the right thing. Don’t guilt yourself into letting him come home, or letting him near your son, without proper treatment and/or supervision! You’re doing the right thing for your son. And, most likely, for yourself. And even, although it might not feel so at the time, ultimately, for your husband
Changing in any way will probably be temporary…until your husband decides to do it for himself! Your job, now, is to keep your son as safe as possible…and be in a position to be the best parent you can be!
Prayers for all of you!!!
You’re doing the right thing. Don’t guilt yourself into letting him come home, or letting him near your son, without proper treatment and/or supervision! You’re doing the right thing for your son. And, most likely, for yourself. And even, although it might not feel so at the time, ultimately, for your husband
Changing in any way will probably be temporary…until your husband decides to do it for himself! Your job, now, is to keep your son as safe as possible…and be in a position to be the best parent you can be!
Prayers for all of you!!!
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