Marriage

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Why marry someone who doesn’t share your faith?

Marriage is rocky enough as it is!
 
Yes, it’s possible. Different things will need to happen, depending on whether the agnostic was baptized Catholic, validly baptized in another faith community or unbaptized.

The Catholic party should ask him/herself if marrying an agnostic is a danger to his/her own faith.
 
Thank you for your comments. I agree. It is a question for my daughter who has somehow picked up her own beliefs that tell her that this is totally exceptable and holds no danger for her own faith, She stated to me that if she cannot marry him in a Catholic Church ceremony then she will just not marry at all. Just continue to live together. I am so worried about this distorted idea of hers. He is a baptized Lutheran that has fallen away from his faith and sternly refuses to go back and tells her he will never turn Catholic. He is still searching. I’ve heard it said once that the stronger of the couple will sway the other. He has already convinced her that they’re promised to each other forever and she dissagrees when I tell her that living together is so very wrong and statics show that there is more of a chance of divorce if the couple does marry. Her favorite answer is “Don’t worry mom, I’m fine!” 🤷
 
PauletteJV0114 said:
He has already convinced her that they’re promised to each other forever and she dissagrees when I tell her that living together is so very wrong and statics show that there is more of a chance of divorce if the couple does marry. Her favorite answer is “Don’t worry mom, I’m fine!” 🤷
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Grey hair is a genetic trait, you get it from your kids.

While he may not believe that, the fact that he was baptized in the Lutheran Church means that if they do get married in the Catholic Church, their marriage will be a sacrament.

If it’s so important to her to get married in the Catholic Church that she’d be willing to forgo marriage altogther if it weren’t allowed, you have to have some hope that her faith is important to her – even if she, like my own children, may have a warped view of what our faith says.
 
have you asked her how she would teach the kids? would this guy agree to raising the children in the faith, which is part of getting married in the Church? They might not be thinking ahead very much, and need to realize that having one parent going to Church and the other saying he never will is damaging to the kids. Lots of times, the kids wind up not believing in anything because that of course is the easiest option.

Sometimes it works though: when we were little, my mom took us to Mass and we noticed Dad wasn’t going. We asked him why he didn’t go to Mass and I guess he needed an answer for us or something (we were really small). Anyway, he started looking into the faith more and saw how much sense it makes! My dad is a really logical, rational sort of guy. He converted to Catholicism when I was about seven.

I could tell you similar stories about many of my aunts and uncles, the living together first part included.

You know why I think it worked out okay in my family?

Because my grandmama goes to Mass everyday and prays the rosary everyday, for all of our family’s intentions.

I would say, don’t badger them: state your case once and very clearly. Then pray for them. When the time comes that they need help, they’ll be more likely to come to you because you won’t have put walls up between you.
 
My daughter did tell me that it was decided that their children would be raised Catholic, but I have concerns there too because my daughter seems to think spending an hour in Eucharistic Adoration is just as good as going to Mass. (Something she recently told me she did when I thought she went to Sunday Mass.) What next???
 
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