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Guest
I always knew my husband of 3 years didn’t have the best memory, but I feel he may be presenting some delusional behavior. He gets very aggravated if I suggest he has made a mistake. Sometimes it’s as simple as me asking, “I thought you said the party was this day?” for clarification, and he’ll reply, “No, don’t do this to me today!” or some other defensive response. If we differ on what we believe was said by either one of us, I always have to cede to him to avoid a lengthy argument. However, he believes he is the one giving into me all the time. Several family members and friends have picked up on this. Another example - I had asked my husband to be intimate with me 8 times over 6 weeks and he said no each time, which made me scared to initiate intimacy. We were not intimate during those 6 weeks. He asked me how to help me feel less scared, and he said he felt like I should be over it because it was only five times during one week, and he claimed we were intimate when he initiated. When I said I still felt scared because I remember it being 8 times over several weeks, and because the final time he turned me down I said, “I guess you don’t want to,” which he thought was manipulative, so he responded, “If you keep talking like that to me, I’ll never want to have an intimate experience with you again.” My husband’s response to my memory was, “See, you just keep making my sin appear bigger! It just keeps growing. It wasn’t like that.” I let the conversation drop because I didn’t know what to do.
Another delusion I think he has is he believes he knows better than doctors over the safety of our children. No matter how many times I have asked/begged, he will not stop giving our child giant bites of food and/or food she is not ready for. Our daughter is 22 months old, and she often gags when he feeds her. He has given her whole peanuts and walnuts since she was 19 months, has her tip her head back and pours handfuls of blueberries into her mouth, feeds her while she’s lying down, etc. When I tell him the dangers of choking, he says the reason that our daughter is different from kids who choke is that “she has good breeding.” He doesn’t think articles written by doctors or advice from our pediatrician applies to our daughter. If I confronted him about the “good breeding” comment, he would play it off like he was joking, so I feel like I’m going in circles. About a week ago, he let our 5 1/2 month old son chew on a cucumber, and he began gagging. I fished the piece out of his mouth only to see my husband’s father try to give my son another cucumber.
There is a history of delusions, compulsive lying, heavy exaggerating, and memory issues in his family (stories he has told me and events I have witnessed myself). I feel this is worth mentioning because of genetic and learned traits that may be affecting my husband’s behavior.
We are starting counseling, however, I’m afraid it may not help.
Let me finish by saying I know that I am human, not perfect, and can be forgetful too, but my husband seems to be stepping outside the norm of what I know how to handle.
Another delusion I think he has is he believes he knows better than doctors over the safety of our children. No matter how many times I have asked/begged, he will not stop giving our child giant bites of food and/or food she is not ready for. Our daughter is 22 months old, and she often gags when he feeds her. He has given her whole peanuts and walnuts since she was 19 months, has her tip her head back and pours handfuls of blueberries into her mouth, feeds her while she’s lying down, etc. When I tell him the dangers of choking, he says the reason that our daughter is different from kids who choke is that “she has good breeding.” He doesn’t think articles written by doctors or advice from our pediatrician applies to our daughter. If I confronted him about the “good breeding” comment, he would play it off like he was joking, so I feel like I’m going in circles. About a week ago, he let our 5 1/2 month old son chew on a cucumber, and he began gagging. I fished the piece out of his mouth only to see my husband’s father try to give my son another cucumber.
There is a history of delusions, compulsive lying, heavy exaggerating, and memory issues in his family (stories he has told me and events I have witnessed myself). I feel this is worth mentioning because of genetic and learned traits that may be affecting my husband’s behavior.
We are starting counseling, however, I’m afraid it may not help.
Let me finish by saying I know that I am human, not perfect, and can be forgetful too, but my husband seems to be stepping outside the norm of what I know how to handle.