Marrying a non-practicing Catholic

[divinefaith]

Hi there…

I am aware that permission is needed to marry a non-Catholic or a non-Christian (only if the couple agrees to raise future children within the Catholic Church).

However, what is the situation like if one of the parties is a non-practicing Catholic (baptized but not much of a believer)?

 

[jochoa]

This came in the mail just the other day from Flocknote’s Catechism in a Year subscription service:

Day #149: Can Catholics marry non-Catholics?

Can Catholics marry non-Catholics? (updated answer from CCC) Difference of confession between the spouses does not constitute an insurmountable obstacle for marriage, when they succeed in placing in common what they have received from their respective communities, and learn from each other the way in which each lives in fidelity to Christ. But the difficulties of mixed marriages must not be underestimated. They arise from the fact that the separation of Christians has not yet been overcome. The spouses risk experiencing the tragedy of Christian disunity even in the heart of their own home. Disparity of cult can further aggravate these difficulties. Differences about faith and the very notion of marriage, but also different religious mentalities, can become sources of tension in marriage, especially as regards the education of children. The temptation to religious indifference can then arise.

According to the law in force in the Latin Church, a mixed marriage needs for liceity the express permission of ecclesiastical authority. In case of disparity of cult an express dispensation from this impediment is required for the validity of the marriage.This permission or dispensation presupposes that both parties know and do not exclude the essential ends and properties of marriage; and furthermore that the Catholic party confirms the obligations, which have been made known to the non-Catholic party, of preserving his or her own faith and ensuring the baptism and education of the children in the Catholic Church.

Further reading: CCC 1633-1637

 

[1ke]

However, what is the situation like if one of the parties is a non-practicing Catholic (baptized but not much of a believer)?

Well, first, this is a very bad idea.

As to what the law says on the matter:

Can. 1071 §1. Except in a case of necessity, a person is not to assist without the permission of the local ordinary at:

4/ a marriage of a person who has notoriously rejected the Catholic faith;

§2. The local ordinary is not to grant permission to assist at the marriage of a person who has notoriously rejected the Catholic faith unless the norms mentioned in ⇒ can. 1125 have been observed with necessary adaptation.

Regarding what constitutes “notorious rejecction” it is someone who has consciously rejected the Catholic faith and that rejection is publicly known. It would be up to the pastor to examine the situation to determine if the person had “notoriously rejected” the faith. If so, then paragraph 2 would apply and the norms of mixed marriage would apply.

(Note: notorious rejection is not the same as formal defection. Formal defection meant actually writing a letter to the bishop. Notorious rejection requires no such act, it is based on the 1917 code and its definition of “notorious”).

Also, if the person completely rejects the Church’s teachings on marriage, then they cannot be married. From Familiaris Consortio:

However, when in spite of all efforts, engaged couples show that they reject explicitly and formally what the Church intends to do when the marriage of baptized persons is celebrated, the pastor of souls cannot admit them to the celebration of marriage. In spite of his reluctance to do so, he has the duty to take note of the situation and to make it clear to those concerned that, in these circumstances, it is not the Church that is placing an obstacle in the way of the celebration that they are asking for, but themselves.

So a case like this must be carefully investigated by the pastor, pastoral council given, and then a decision made by the pastor as to whether or not the bishop needs to be involved.

 

[pianistclare]

Yup. ^^^ I assume you will have sessions with your Pastor/Parish priest prior to the wedding.
He will discuss this with both of you at length.

 

[Chatter163]

As has been stated, it’s certainly not a great idea. Red flags all over it.

 

[Reuben_J]

Hi there…

I am aware that permission is needed to marry a non-Catholic or a non-Christian (only if the couple agrees to raise future children within the Catholic Church).

However, what is the situation like if one of the parties is a non-practicing Catholic (baptized but not much of a believer)?

Get married as in all Catholic marriages. Thank God the other party is a Catholic, it makes it whole lot easier. Hopefully you can persuade him to that or is his non-practicing/not much a believer preclude him from doing so? Then that would be a problem. If he agrees to go along with all the Catholic practices, well, you are blessed. It is a great opportunity to bring back a person, now spouse, to be closer to God. Not by force or pressure, but perhaps by more of examples of how Godly you are and as a result make you a devoted wife/husband and mother/father.

 

[otjm]

Get married as in all Catholic marriages. Thank God the other party is a Catholic, it makes it whole lot easier. Hopefully you can persuade him to that or is his non-practicing/not much a believer preclude him from doing so? Then that would be a problem. If he agrees to go along with all the Catholic practices, well, you are blessed. It is a great opportunity to bring back a person, now spouse, to be closer to God. Not by force or pressure, but perhaps by more of examples of how Godly you are and as a result make you a devoted wife/husband and mother/father.

Oh wonderful, oh dandy - now we will have a marriage, presumably with children, who are going to see one of the parents as “I don’t give a flip”. Attitudes of parents run strong and deep. And especially negative attitudes. and that negative attitude - ah, no problem at all when kids get rebellious in their teenage years, or go off to college and no longer have to follow what the practicing spouse forced them to do - when the other parent obviously sent a clear and consistent message that “Hey, that church stuff? Totally B.S.”

“oh boy, let’s get married so I can drag you back to Church will all my saintliness”. And 7 or 8 years from now, when one has felt that reading the Sunday newspaper with a cup of joe is far more important than paying even minimal attention to God, that attitude is going to have had 7 years of impact on the other. Not to mention any children.

Golly, maybe we can replace the non-involved spouse with a recovering drug or alcohol addict. Bet that would work really well too - think of the shining example of the non-addicted spouse; why, that is just going to keep the addict on the straight path, no doubt!

Or maybe the spouse-to-be is a vet and suffering harshly wtih PTSD; why, the loving support of the non-vet spouse is going to make that just simply disappear, with all the balm of love given.

Right.