Mary Question

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StacieAdy

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Hello Everyone,

My husband and I have been in RCIA for about three months now. We are very excited about Catholicism and about what we are learning! (There is so much to learn!)

I was hoping maybe you all could answer a question for me. I come from a Protestant background, and so have been raised being taught certain things about Catholicism. I am happy to say that I never believed anything I’d heard, as from childhood on, I was always drawn to Catholicism. So now that I am becoming Catholic, I am finding myself more and more drawn to Mary. The problem is, I don’t know what to do with my newfound fascination with her. I was taught as a Protestant that we are not to speak/pray to anyone else other than God, as it’s a betrayel to God, and no one else in Heaven can hear us anyway. This was not MY belief, but just what I had been taught. Can you please tell me, how do you all know that God is okay with us loving Mary? And what do you all do, those of you who are devoted to her? Do you speak to her like you would a friend? Do you have a personal relationship with her, like we do God??

I know this is probably a very basic and boring question for most of you, lol. But I’m just starting out, and the basics are where we’re at in RCIA right now! 🙂

Thank you all in advance for your time. I hope you’re having a blessed day!

Stacie
 
this is the perfect time of year to begin with what the gospels do say about Mary, esp. as we are reading from Luke, whose early chapters contain nearly all we know about her from the gospels. These also are the scriptures upon which we meditate in the Joyful Mysteries of the Rosary. Even if you are not ready to begin praying the rosary, begin with Luke’s gospel, re-reading it prayerfully (I know you are already steeped in scripture from your previous background) and be open to what the Holy Spirit has to say about Mary to you.
 
As far as knowing if God wants us to love Mary…the simplest way of looking at it is that the ideal for a Christian is to be as much like Jesus as possible. We know that Jesus was a good Jew and followed the 10 Commandments, one of which is to love one’s mother and father. So we can then say that Jesus must have loved His mother very much, in a perfect way that only Jesus is capable of (the same of course goes for His heavenly father, and I am sure His adopted earthly father). Therefore, I think its safe to say that in imitating Christ, we can never love His mother as much as He does.

As far as how I relate to Mary - she is my beloved heavenly mother, and so I speak to her as both a friend, and in a way I have a relationship to her, like any daughter might with her mother. It is not the same as my relationship with her Son - in fact, my relationship with Mary exists only because of her Son! Mary desires only for us to know Jesus better - she is the moon reflecting the light of the Sun, she is a mirror which reflects Christ’s awesome love.

Mary is the image of the perfect disciple - fully human and yet her every fiber was devoted to the purpose of God. Imagine being a young woman, a child really, and approached by an angel who asks you to become the mother of God, and the faith she had to answer “Yes!” with no hesistation at all. She is an example to all of us who hope to be faithful Christians - the very perfect model of obedience.

I hope that this explanation has helped you - I know that our Mother is a great challenge to those entering the Church. Just try to keep in the forefront of your mind that love for Mary does not take away from love for her Son - her only purpose is to point us to Jesus. He gave us His own mother as a gift to us, so that the family would be complete. I pray that one day, you will be able to accept that gift with open arms! God bless you, dear sister!
 
StacieAdy said:
I know this is probably a very basic and boring question for most of you, lol. But I’m just starting out, and the basics are where we’re at in RCIA right now! 🙂

Thank you all in advance for your time. I hope you’re having a blessed day!

Stacie
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Since others are informing you as to why, I would like to suggest a how to get closer to Mary. The Rosary. Pray her Rosary daily, 5 decades per day. You meditate on the life of Jesus, as seen through the eyes of his Mother, who will be standing beside you as you pray. 👍

Once you strat praying the rosary daily, you will wonder how you ever got along without it:D
 
Hhow do we know it is acceptable to love Mary?

Jesus when he was on the cross, gave his mother to the beloved disciple. As John stands there, he represents the body of believers, the people of God. John represented all the faithful of God, past present and future. Mary is our Mother as she was given to be John’s mother from that day to this.
From the Gospel of John:
Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved, he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.
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We, too, should embrace Mary; just as John did. Mary always points the way to her Son Jesus, the Redeemer, our Savior.

Illustrated in this passage from The Gospel of John:
On the third day there was a wedding in Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the wedding. When the wine ran short, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine.” (And) Jesus said to her, “Woman, how does your concern affect me? My hour has not yet come.” His mother said to the servers, "Do whatever he tells you."
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And they did as she instructed them. Likewise we should follower Mary’s lead When God asks us to embrace our calling, we should answer: “Let it be done unto me; according to Your will” We should “ponder” the way of God in our hearts; seeking to understand vs. railling at God when we are inconvenienced or troubled. We need to acccept the cross that has been appointed to us. Simeon told Mary a “sword would pierce her heart” and yet she still perservered to follow Jesus to the foot of the the cross.

You have to love Mary, Jesus did. Jesus honored his mother as the commandments instructed. Should we do less?
 
djamu said:
i always think Mary as a foot stool, not a diety.
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Well, no faithful Catholic thinks of her as a deity either - but she’s the mother of THE Deity, so deserves major props for that for shiz.
 
LilyM said:
Well, no faithful Catholic thinks of her as a deity either - but she’s the mother of THE Deity, so deserves major props for that for shiz.
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I agree. Nice selection of terminology at the end. 😛
 
StacieAdy said:
And what do you all do, those of you who are devoted to her? Do you speak to her like you would a friend? Do you have a personal relationship with her, like we do God??
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Yes. She is, after all, His mother. He wants us to be on friendly speaking terms with His mother, as well as all his other friends–the saints. I have no problem in speaking with Mary or other saints in prayer, just as I would with fellow Christians. We are all united in one Church with one Lord, and united in one Spirit. This is what is meant by the Catholic doctrine of the “communion of saints.” It is a big family.

You might consider getting a reproduction of the picture of Our Lady of Perpetual Help–the Theotokos image. It is a helpful reminder of her concern and prayers for each of us, as the mother given us from the cross by her son.
 
I am a convert, too, and I felt very uncomfortable the first time I prayed the rosary. But I just kept praying it, eventually making an act of consecration to Mary (through St. Maximilian Kolbe’s Militia of the Immaculata), learning more about her, and just developing a relationship with her, like I did with her Son. For me, it was just a matter of letting the truth about her take hold in my heart as well as my head. I look back and wonder why I ever felt uncomfortable making Mary a part of my walk with Christ.🙂
 
To all of you who have responded so far, THANK YOU!! I have read, re-read and read some more, everything that you all have written. You have put a peace in my heart, and I am very excited about exploring Mary.

Veritas41 - You have inspired me to be determined in my pursuit of Mary. I want “the truth about her to take hold in my heart as well as my head.”

JimG - I love how you explained “communion of saints.” It makes perfect sense to me that we should and can talk to those who are in Heaven, and you have confirmed that for me.

LilyM - Your hip hop lingo had me cracking up! I agree, she does deserve props for shiz.

YADA - In all my Protestant years, I don’t think I ever heard the story of Christ giving Mary to John. To hear you describe it to me made such perfect sense, and truthfully brought tears to my eyes. I was taught that Luke 8:19 - 21 is proof that we should not put anymore importance on Mary than anyone else, (because Christ didn’t go running to her, I guess.) Again, I did not believe this myself. But it is so refreshing to hear this scripture from John that you opened my eyes to.

Marilena - I will look into this book, thank you!! I love to read, so I know I will enjoy this book very much.

Andruschak - I am just starting to pray the Rosary, and though it’s taking time to get used to, I am really starting to fall in love with it! My husband’s Grandma gave me her rosary that she has prayed with for years, so I’ve been learning how to pray it!

Sandtigress - I loved your description of your relationship with Mary. It definitely answered my question, and has made me realize that I haven’t even begun to know her yet! Thank you very much.

Puzzleannie - I thank you for your suggestion to read Luke. Though I have been raised with the scriptures, I certainly have never read Luke while thinking about Mary specifically. I will do so now, and am looking forward to it!

I could go on and on with all of you, but I’ve probably made this post too long already, lol. Thank you all so much! Any thing you all want to teach me will always be so appreciated.

Stacie
 
Marilena said:
a foot stool? care to explain?
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Don’t know about the poster’s intent, but my take on that would be that Mary helps us reach her Son; she lifts us higher, and therefore, like a foot stool, she gives us a boost! (Probably a bit of a stretch, but I tried…🙂 )
 
I can’t really add much to what has already been said. I believe with all my heart that Jesus gave us Mary as our Mother. This makes sense of course because we are called upon to be “Christ-like” and “imitators of Christ”. Since He loved His mother and no doubt always honored her, I believe that every Christian is called to do the same. Sadly, because of the need to distance themselves from Catholicism, protestants have all but severed their relationship with Mary.

My relationship with Mary is not exactly the same as it is with Jesus. Jesus is, of course, “elevated” above Mary, as it should be. Of course, that is exactly how Mary wants it… every gift she has received from God is used to bring souls to her Son.

I am not as devoted to her has many Catholics. I don’t know why I haven’t made the time to pray the Rosary daily. I know I need to and every time that I have I have been rewarded in some small way. For instance, when I meditate on the mysteries, I almost always receive a new insight or thought about life, death or resurrection of Our Lord. I highly recommend praying the Rosary, you will find that your relationship with the Lord will only get stronger and stronger.
 
wherever there is a question about our Beloved Mother, I’d want to jump right in :). To me she is my Mother, and I ask for Her intercession. God teaches us to love our parents, thus, it is perfect to love His.

In the past, I was in, say, darkness, but I did not realize it; however, I listened to my biological mother to say 10 Hail Mary per day. I believe through the Virgin Mary, my soul has been saved. I am so thankful to God for His Mercy. He is our only God, and I thankful to Him for giving us the perfect Mother in Heaven. Currently, I do not want to skip praying with the rosary any day.

God bless.
 
a couple of further suggestions for Christians raised in a strong tradition of going directly to Christ in prayer, who have problems with Mary as a mediator: do just that, go before the Blessed Sacrament to Christ in prayer and simply ask him, Lord, how would you wish me to regard your mother?

another scripture for meditation which we hear right after the gospel of the baptism of the Lord, is the wedding feast at Cana, which gives a good picture of the relationship between Mary and her Son. had another great thought which went out the window taking a few brain cells with it.

oh, PP reminded me, one thing we have found through RCIA is that this happens both in prayer to our Heavenly Father, and in prayer to Mary our mother–issues with one’s earthly parents arise, often present obstacles in the path to continuing conversion, and often require deep healing (sometimes to the point of prof. counselling) before that person can move along to a proper relationship with God, and with Mary. This probably may not apply to OP but it is something to keep in mind in apologetics and catechesis.

Jeff Cavins gives a beautiful testimony of how his studies of the Father’s revelation in salvation history, the Our Father, and other scriptures led him to healing the break with his own father (he had left his childhood religion, became a protestant preacher and eventually Catholic). It is part of his conversion story, I have heard it in person a couple of times but he probably has a tape of his testimony.
 
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