Mass no no's

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Parents who let their kids throw toys, pull the hair of the people in front of them, kick the back of the pew in front of them, and run around the church screaming, while making no attempts to stop the kids (yes, I’ve experienced all of these). Most parents and kids are fine, normal kid behavior is fine (crying babies, fidgety toddlers). Parents who make no effort to stop bratty terrors are not fine.

People who chatter at normal volume before/during Mass.

People who spend the whole Mass sneezing, coughing, and wiping their noses with their hands who 1) want to shake my hand, and 2) take big swigs from the communion cup.
 
<< Parents who let their kids throw toys, pull the hair of the people in front of them, kick the back of the pew in front of them, and run around the church screaming, while making no attempts to stop the kids (yes, I’ve experienced all of these). Most parents and kids are fine, normal kid behavior is fine (crying babies, fidgety toddlers). Parents who make no effort to stop bratty terrors are not fine.>>

Oh, you just have a problem with kids at Mass you Mass Cop, you. 😛

<< People who chatter at normal volume before/during Mass.

People who spend the whole Mass sneezing, coughing, and wiping their noses with their hands who 1) want to shake my hand, and 2) take big swigs from the communion cup. >>

I agree with you on all points. The one thing all these examples have in common is how rude and inconsiderate people have become these days.
 
There have been a number of ‘no-nos’ that I’ve seen at my church recently.

Fortunately, it’s still enough of an oddity that it stands out.

“Did you hear about…?”, or “Did you see…?” are still the responses to those things.

What I don’t get is when someone does a “no-no”, and every one else is encouraged to LET IT GO(!!!:eek: !!!)

There is a family at the church that has a small child (a boy, about 6 - 8 years old) that has those sneakers with wheels. Well, the first few times, I never did see him with the adults. *. Finally, last Sunday, I asked him ‘where is your grown up’ - one can’t assume he’s there with his mother/father/grandparent.

He took me to his mother, a woman I recognized from when her older children were coming up. The other kids had all been just fine, imo. When I told her that her son couldn’t roll in church, she proceeded to clarify that he wasn’t wearing a roller skate, but a shoe with a wheel.

I mentioned this to one of our Ministers of Service, who told me, ‘you should just let that go’.

I guess I’m going to be in BIG trouble, because I can’t just let that go.

I am considering finding another church, because if the inmates are allowed to take over the asylum, I don’t need to be there.*
 
Faith1960 said:
You do realize that by saying this below, it’s being judgemental, don’t you?
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Yes.

This whole thread is pretty much just one big list of judgements on the behavior of others durng mass though.
 
PseudoHermit_22 said:
Yes.

This whole thread is pretty much just one big list of judgements on the behavior of others durng mass though.
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This is why I posted the following earlier. I was really hoping this thread would die.

My number #1 no-no at Mass is worrying about what goes around you and allowing it to affect your own worship.
 
Maureen_Fiore said:
Well, as a parent I did tell her to stop and she was showing off in front of her boyfriend. I was annoyed with her behavior from the moment we walked in until this incident happened. I questioned God why do I drag my family to church when I have to be annoyed by their behavior? I had a hard time going up for Communion because I was so upset with her. Later, after I reflected on what had happened I realized that maybe God was answering my prayers. As a parent I have an obligation to bring up my children in the Catholic faith. I cannot give my children a choice as to whether or not they want to attend mass.

What might my problem be???

Have you also realized that you were wrong??
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In what way?

You didn’t correct her behavior, or at least in your initial post you didn’t say that you did. You said you were shocked that someone else did. . That is where you were wrong. That and in apparently being offended that someone else took the initiative to do something that you as her parent had the responsibility to do.

And at the possibility of being rude, I don’t think you did try to correct her behavior and were truly offended that the stranger did. As a Police Officer, I see way too many parents complaining that someone else said something to their children for some misbehavior their kids have done. The fact that you said you were shocked at the strangers act pretty well demonstrates that.

At least you later realized that what the starnger did was not inappropriate.
 
<< My number #1 no-no at Mass is worrying about what goes around you and allowing it to affect your own worship. >>

If I were able to see and hear the Mass and not notice an entire hour of jumping, climbing, waving, bouncing, whispering, singing, swinging things etc. around me, I guess there would be no problem. Unfortunately, I get very distracted when this is going on throughout the entire Mass.
 
<< Yes.

This whole thread is pretty much just one big list of judgements on the behavior of others durng mass though. >.

I agree, which is why it’s titled “Mass no-no’s.” You seemed to be rather critical of other people’s peeves but have a peeve or two of your own, though. 😉
 
PseudoHermit_22 said:
If you really want to know mine, it’s this:

-Seeing a dollar bill in the collection basket.
.
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Eventhough we give in our envelopes, by eight and six year olds will bring a dollar or quarter to give as well. Sometimes, my ex-Protestant hubby will pull spare dollars out of his wallet to throw in. SO, here we are with an envelope with a check, a pile of ones from my hubby and whatever the girls gave from the money they earned.

Maybe that dollar is a bonus!
 
DiscerningDave said:
  1. Holding hands during the Our Father
  2. Blue-jeans
  3. People who feel it is necessary when saying the Creed or Our Father to say it one sentence faster than the rest of the congregation. And usually, they sit it front of me. It is just distracting, but I am glad they are saying it.
  4. Arriving after the procession enters
  5. Leaving before the procession leaves.
  6. EM’s wearing jeans
  7. Cell phones
  8. Crying babies that should be in the cry room
  9. Basically, anything that is disruptive to the mass and draws attention away from the ceremony itself
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You pretty much covered everything for me. I would add though…people who sit at the end of the pew and refuse to move when others enter. I always sit toward the middle because there will always be late arrivers.

:heart:Blyss
 
PseudoHermit_22 said:
For being part of a religion that seriously encourages its adherents to have a lot of children, a lot of you really need to take it easy on the toddlers, in my opinion.

Yes, parents definitely need to do all they can to keep their kids contained and quiet, but there is a realistic expectation for each age and then there is being really unrealistic about it.

A three year old is rarely going to sit still and be completely quiet for the entire mass.

.
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Yes! Thank you! I agree.👍
 
<< You pretty much covered everything for me. I would add though…people who sit at the end of the pew and refuse to move when others enter. I always sit toward the middle because there will always be late arrivers. >>

Oooops. That would be me. I get very anxious and claustrophobic being squished in the middle. Occasionally I’ll move in toward the middle but I’m very anxious there the whole time and then spend a good amount of time during Mass planning how to get out easily if I feel like I’m going to faint or throw up. It’s better for all concerned if I sit on the end where I chose to sit in the first place. 👍
 
There were two very cute little kids, a boy and a girl, probably around 3 and 4 years old who, between the both of them, were playing with the missle, eating something that appeared to be a granola bar, holding or maybe eating candy, having sword fights with some pencils or whatever they had in their hands, just to name a few things.
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Whats even worse than little kids playing with their toys are kids be they brother&sister or brothers and they start hitting each other and the mother or father ignore them. And whats worse than that are parents who start playing peek-a-boo with their little kids during mass… That drives me up the wall.:mad:
My number #1 no-no at Mass is worrying about what goes around you and allowing it to affect your own worship.
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Its hard to ignore them when they are sitting in front of you. This is when the ushers should quietly invite the parents to use the cry room
 
Faith1960 said:
<< My number #1 no-no at Mass is worrying about what goes around you and allowing it to affect your own worship. >>

If I were able to see and hear the Mass and not notice an entire hour of jumping, climbing, waving, bouncing, whispering, singing, swinging things etc. around me, I guess there would be no problem. Unfortunately, I get very distracted when this is going on throughout the entire Mass.
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As you stated, YOU get very distracted. That is something that YOU need to work on. As a single mother of a 2 year old, I spend most of my time in Eucharistic Adoration trying to prevent my daughter from doing anything that may be “distracting” for any other adorer (even trying to teach her to pray) b/c I have had a woman yell at me in Adoration. Granted, my daughter just wants to play with the rosaries, but if one drops it makes noise (which in a quiet chapel distracts others). However, my daughter and I both have the right to adore Jesus too, and I don’t get that opportunity b/c I have to worry more about other people’s personal focus issues than spending time with Jesus. Why do so many complain about the youth not following Jesus and being active Catholics yet the same people are the first to complain about the active Catholics who bring their “noisy” children to Mass weekly?

As for mass, I have learned to ignore my daughter’s talking so that I can get my spiritual food. There are a few mildly to severely disabled children at my parish (one who has even climbed right behind me during the mass many times to take my daughter’s books) and well, I notice them, but they don’t lead me away from being an active participant in the celebration of the Mass.

In the past this was not always the case, but I realized that if I was distracted during the Mass that was MY problem and noone elses. I know many parents who can drown out all other distractions and focus solely on the Mass. That is what those with no-no lists should also strive to do.
 
jbuck919 said:
Some of these no-nos (turning around, making a brief comment to your neighbtor) are based on the teachings of sister Eucharsitica, who had the power to slam you over the back or even in the belly with a yardstick in the old days.
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Oh, I think she might have taught at my school! 😉
 
I don’t know that it is bad venting, but perhaps it is. After all, some of what was psoted here as pet peeves has caused others to be paranoid or offended, so maybe it is not such a big idea.

I have a few things that irritate me at Mass sometimes. I realize that such distractions are my own short-comings, though, and not others. When I find my ire rising, I try to step back and take responsibility for my own impatience and not blame the source. This is easier during Mass than any other time. If only I could have the same grace while driving.
 
<< Whats even worse than little kids playing with their toys are kids be they brother&sister or brothers and they start hitting each other and the mother or father ignore them. >>

I haven’t seen the hitting but have seen and heard other behaviors that the parents ignore, like what sounded like a toy truck or car being run back and forth on the pews (and this sounded like it was several rows back in a different section so I can only feel sorry for the poor people stuck having to sit next to, in front of or behind them) and kids grabbing around mom and dad to mess with their sibling.

And whats worse than that are parents who start playing peek-a-boo with their little kids during mass… That drives me up the wall.:mad:

I haven’t seen that either but have seen zome moms (it’s always the mothers) who encourage the behaviors I do see.
The dads are usually stricter and I don’t recall seeing them encouraging it.

<< Its hard to ignore them when they are sitting in front of you. This is when the ushers should quietly invite the parents to use the cry room. >>

It’s more than hard to ignore, it’s impossible, unless one wears earplugs and closes their eyes all through Mass. From the look I’ve seen on other people’s faces when sitting next to this circus, we’re not the only ones who are very sick and tired of this. 😦
 
<<< I haven’t seen that either but have seen zome moms (it’s always the mothers) who encourage the behaviors I do see.
The dads are usually stricter and I don’t recall seeing them encouraging it. >>>

I’ve seen SOME moms, not “zome moms.” 😃
 
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